


Roommate Wanted

by Geromy



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Asexual Character, Bisexual Female Character, F/F, F/M, Genderqueer Character, Roommates, Trans Male Character, Unrelated Strilondes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-07-23
Updated: 2015-11-17
Packaged: 2017-12-21 01:45:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 26
Words: 87,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/894348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Geromy/pseuds/Geromy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rose needs a roommate for the summer. Dave just needs a place to stay. And against all odds including Rose herself, he manages to pass her maze of tests and she agrees to give him the bedroom. Dave figures living with this girl should be okay now that he's finally "in" but it only gets tougher when he sees that Rose Lalonde is... Really quite the girl. Who tends to make out with a lot of other girls.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [Требуется Сожитель (Roommate Wanted by Geromy)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1162944) by [Mr_Scapegrace](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mr_Scapegrace/pseuds/Mr_Scapegrace)



A distinct and familiar gust of wind blew past as Rose exited the gymnasium, her multi-purpose shoulder bag in one hand as she repositioned it where it belonged. Her thumb glided across the keys on her Blackberry as she took a few steps, halting once she was out of the way of the gym doors to avoid having a distraction related accident.

She had just finished her last final exam of the semester, and she was feeling very, _very_ relieved.

It wasn’t like she was stressed about failing. Literature was by far her best subject, and she was smart to have saved all her psychology related classes for first semester so she could get them out of the way. No, she was just relieved because this meant she could finally settle down, pick up more shifts at work, and study less over the summer months. She had taken a couple summer courses so she could get ahead on her program, but a semester of two was going to be substantially easier to manage than a semester of six.

Once she had informed Jade that she was finished writing she went back on her way, heels catching puddles as she idly tried to step over them. She rewrapped her scarf once more around her neck, sliding her hands into the pockets of her jacket. Yes, this was the weather she was all too familiar with. Rain, wind, a bright sun, and absolutely no desire to enjoy any of it.

With the semester ending there was only one issue left to deal with, which Rose had been putting off during exam weeks. Today would be the day where she finally had to get a handle on it. Or, tomorrow, since after five exams and a short story project, getting drunk sounded like a much more appealing option. Count in the hangover and she might as well leave it a couple days more.

_No Rose, you can’t procrastinate on this, no matter how unappealing it sounds._

Swiping her bus pass she stepped aboard, sitting herself down next to plenty of other students that had finished the exact same exam she had just written. Some of them were totally relaxed, others, still anxious. It was easy to tell which based on the way they either absorbed themselves into their phones or bit their nails or twiddled their thumbs or mingled with others. Rose merely smirked, setting her bag on her lap to pull out her book. She checked her phone too, noticing the screen lit up from Jade’s response. 

JADE HARLEY (2:34 PM): meet you at the liquor store? ;D   
ROSE LALONDE (2:34 PM): Undoubtedly. 

Her phone was hidden away again as she opened to her bookmark. She remained unshaken as it slid down the page and into her lap.

 

It was pages and stops later that she saw the familiar landmark of her favorite music store (they had violin arrangements no one else did), and she stowed her book safely away to ring the bell. Adjusting her bag again she stood, moving toward the door and grabbing the bar next to it to steady herself. The bus slowed, stopped, and the doors hissed open. She offered a quiet thank you before stepping off, hanging left and heading toward the small mall that held its collection of completely unrelated shops and stores including the liquor store, a skateboard shop, and a remarkably classy adult video rental place. Naturally Rose had ventured into that shop plenty.

Moving around the lot to the liquor store, Jade’s motorcycle was already parked out front, a second helmet waiting in the basket as Jade held hers up under her forearm.

Rose’s lips pulled back into a smile, quickly disguising it as a challenging sneer. 

“Oh, so I get a ride home now?” she teased, making a show of combing through her hair. “I’m so glad your generosity extends only a quarter of my trip back. I do love the bus so much.”

Jade had sneered right back, way too comfortable in her skinny jeans and ridiculously clunky leather boots. Rose never understood Jade’s fashion sense. Nor did she try to. She was comfortable in her androgyne, and Rose admired it.

“Yeah, okay,” Jade responded, turning for the door as Rose followed. “And how many dates would you have missed out on if you weren’t on the bus to sweep the person off their feet?" 

“A lot,” Rose admitted, turning straight for the vodka shelves while Jade picked up her case of beer. She yelled across the store as they separated, glad they were the only two current patrons. “But if you picked me up more, I would have just settled for dating you and I wouldn’t have needed them in the first place.”

“Oh so _funny_ ,” Jade groaned. Rose could hear the sarcastic _:P_ in her tone and it made her smile. There was no better roommate than Jade and Rose was never going to change her mind on that.

Jade wandered over with her case, watching as Rose carefully picked out the exact flavors and brands she was interested in. Absolut was good, but not great. Smirnoff was way too cliché. This was an art form and she was not going to get lazy with it.

“So,” Jade started, nudging the toe of her boot into the floor. “Are we at least going to _talk_ about me moving out before we get shit-faced?”

Rose’s heart sunk, and along with it she sunk to her knees to pick up a bottle of Bols from the bottom shelf. She hid her face stubbornly, admiring the way her skin showed through where her nylons had stretched over her knees. “You aren’t moving out, you’re just leaving for the summer.”

“Okay,” Jade sighed, rhythmically bouncing her own knees against her beer case. “Then are we going to talk about that? Rose I know you aren’t a fan of bringing strangers home, but you can’t afford that place on your own. It’s only for four months!”

Rose found herself slightly offended, standing back up and snatching a bottle of Sourpuss before taking off with her purchases toward the counter. Jade followed, head tilted. “You don’t really have time to find a cheaper place, especially if you’re planning on picking up more shifts at the bar. Do you not realize that?”

“Of course I do,” Rose answered, playing up a pompous tone and setting down her bottles one by one. “I merely do not find this issue as urgent as you do. The semester doesn’t start until after a two week break. That’s plenty of time to deal with this at a later date.”

Jade heaved a sigh, her bottles clinking together as her case came down to the counter. “Rose people don’t look for an apartment a few days before their semester starts they look in advance. You’re probably already going to have a tough enough time finding one when you’ve left it this late. I told you to start this before exams started and you didn’t. You can’t keep putting it off. You need a temporary roommate to pay my rent while I’m gone.”

Rose stayed silent, digging around for her wallet and slapping her card down on the counter, along with her ID. The gentleman ringing her through didn’t say a word- just accepted her cards and handed her the machine.

“Why can’t you just. Pay your share while you’re away,” she muttered, losing hope fast with the way this discussion was going. Jade laughed, patting Rose on the head.

“I already have to pay for a plane ticket, and to store my bike, and utilities back home. I can’t afford that and you know it.”

“Then don’t leave,” Rose tried, taking her bag of paper-wrapped bottles with a huge frown. Jade’s purchase went way quicker, and she was already digging for her keys by the time she was ready to answer.

“I gotta. It doesn’t look like Grandpa’s gonna make it through the summer so. I need to pack his things and sell his house and stuff.”

Rose shut her mouth after that, packing her bottles into the basket on Jade’s bike and pulling the spare helmet over her head. She really didn’t want to be selfish about this. She completely understood Jade’s reasoning and sympathized with her situation but. Jade had her pegged. She didn’t want to bring a stranger into the apartment, especially not for more than a night. Even two weeks of time to get to know whoever it was wasn’t going to make her feel better. She doubted much of anything could.

She slung her arms around Jade’s waist as the engine revved and they took off. Rose watched everything they drove past- people, buildings, trees, cars- and didn’t breathe a word. Not even at the few lights they hit. They were back to the complex soon enough, and Jade took her usual spot. Rose slid off, grabbing her bag and bottles and carrying everything inside along with the helmet. Jade followed beer in hand, putting a hand on Rose’s shoulder.

“Just make an ad, alright? I’m sure whoever you’ll find is going to be a perfectly nice person and you’ll have no trouble getting along with them. Hell, they might even be the person who gets you to settle down for more than a week. Wouldn’t that be something?”

Rose smiled, but she really didn’t appreciate the teasing. Anxiety was choking her from the inside and it made her want to scream, gasp out for breath and rip her own throat open. But she had to stay calm. Especially for Jade’s sake. She could under no circumstances make this summer harder on Jade.

“Okay,” she breathed, relaxing a bit when the scent of home washed over. It was certainly comforting. “But you need to help me write it. I have a feeling you’d know what strangers would appreciate aside from doodles of squiddles.”

Hearing that made Jade scoff, sliding her beer up on the kitchen counter.

“Rose, please. What would any potential apartment renter want more on their ad than squiddles?”

Rose visibly relaxed as they both started laughing, and she gave her head a shake as she dropped the bike helmet on the bench next to the door and brought her alcohol over to the counter. She started putting it away, figuring saving it for tonight would be best. Jade on the other hand dove right into her first bottle of beer, her hand curling around the counter’s edge as she leaned up against it and swallowed down a few gulps.

“I don’t even know where to begin with this,” Rose admitted, shedding off her coat and scarf before padding into the living room where her laptop was waiting. She dropped to her knees by the coffee table, opening the screen and letting it wake up. “I mean... What do you even write? Roommate wanted- please no creeps or I might shove you out a window.”

Jade laughed, heading over to sit next to her and sliding a coaster under her bottle. “You can write that if you want. Could help filter out some people who don’t want to be roommates with a potential murderer.”

“Well if they don’t want that, they probably shouldn’t be looking for a roommate in the first place.”

Jade sputtered into her bottle and Rose admired the dribble of beer that slid down her chin. “Alright, touché on that one. Seriously though, I don’t know. Just say it’s a two bedroom one bath with a bus stop right out front to the school and that a girl is seeking a roommate for the next four months. That sounds about right doesn’t it?”

“I suppose,” she mused, mulling it all over. There had to be someway though that she could guarantee someone who wouldn’t cause too much bullshit. Girls only? Probably wouldn’t do much. Maybe it wasn’t about narrowing how many people saw the ad but... narrowing what kind of person could see it. A passive test that would cut people out before interviews or first phone calls.

That’s when it clicked, and just like writing her stories every piece of the ad came totally naturally. A word or two here, a piece of ironic clip art there, and she was loading up the file onto her USB drive. Tomorrow she’d bring it to the university to print off, then she could start putting them up. The old fashioned way. Flyers and tape. No online ads, no QR codes, just tearable tabs with her phone number on them. Yeah, this would work.

“Alright,” Jade spoke up eventually, putting down a couple of hamburgers before having herself a seat. “This is like... My 6th beer and you haven’t even cracked any of your fancy-shmansy mixing booze bottles. Fuck that, go drink. I’m putting on a movie.”

Rose grinned and closed her laptop, moving it away and getting up to her feet. “Alright, alright. Would you like anything while I’m mixing?”

Jade answered with her mouth full, taking a swig of beer to try and wash down some of the hamburger bun that was no doubt stale. “Quit trying to get me drunk you know it just ends in sex.”

Rose had to answer with a snicker, bringing down a martini glass and her shaker, filling the shaker up with ice and starting to mix up her sweet, berry cocktail infusion. Shot of Banana Bols, shot of blueberry vodka, shot of Raspberry Sourpuss, and just a hint of grenadine, all topped with a few splashes of 7Up. That was how you celebrated.

Pouring the mix in her glass she returned to the living room, taking a drink and sliding herself in against Jade’s side. “I’ve never known you to complain about sex, Jade.”

“I’ve never known _you_ to not _suck._ ”

Rose picked up her burger, interrupted by the familiar jingle of 20th Century Fox. 

Two cocktails and three martinis later Jade had finished her beer case, sprawled out on the couch and fallen asleep. Rose was barely conscious herself, eventually opting to turn herself around and rest her head in Jade’s lap. If ever there was anything she was going to miss while Jade was away it was nights like this. Nights where nothing mattered, where responsibility was meaningless- where everything was just _fun_. Those were her absolute favorite times. But without Jade, Rose doubted there would be very many around.

Especially not when she would have a new roommate to keep on their toes. 


	2. Chapter 2

“I’ll get a caramel mocha frappuccino. Two espresso shots, like three and a half pumps of cream and literally three solid inches of whip I’m not joking here. If you wanna be nice you’ll drizzle some chocolate syrup and sprinkle some cinnamon on it.”

Dave never looked up from his wallet as he read off his drink, fingers rifling through crumpled ones. You got what you could running those stupid-ass caricature stands but if it paid for a cup of coffee in the morning while he lost all his savings to a motel, he’d deal with it. He didn’t want to bother looking for an actual job until he knew where he was living, but finding a place to live was proving to be one hell of a fucking hassle. Every ad he looked at was “girls only, must not drink, girls only, no drugs, no smoking, girls only, girls only, girls only.”

He had exhausted every online ad connected to the university’s website, Craigslist was hopeless, and even when he was getting to the end of his wire and checked out the community center, there was nothing there for any human being younger than 75-years-old.

This entire hunt was turning out to be a horrible waste of time, and Dave was wasting away like an animal carcass smack dab in the center of the desert in the middle of August. He had two weeks left before the semester started. He didn’t have a room in res, and his only other option was to go Greek. The thought of which made him shudder. As if he wanted to be stuck bunking in a house full of foul-smelling, womanizing, drunk jocks likely all at school for goddamn football scholarships. He’d probably get beat up for being gay (despite _not_ being) just because he was going into film and that was the last thing he needed.

There was no way in hell he was going to succumb to living in a frat house.

But he didn’t particularly want to move back down south, either. Sure, he loved his brother and living with him was cool, but he still had to spread his wings a little bit. Living in his brother’s shadow started to get really old when he was 18. Once he was 20, he had had e- _fucking_ -nough and opted to start school in the summer instead of even waiting until September. He was ready to get out and he had done just that. 

Instead here he was, sitting in a crummy Starbucks with a crummy old laptop, lapping up crummy whipped cream from a crummy cup that read “Shaggy 2 Dope” on the side and typing up a crummy little screenplay on some crummy free software he had downloaded when he was 14. Going absolutely nowhere without even a place to call home. 

A couple thousand words later his drink was long since finished, and glancing out at the setting sun made his heart feel heavy. Fuck this city, fuck its lack of inexpensive housing, and fuck this entire clichéd coffee shop set up. He stowed his laptop away in his bag, put his cup in the trash where it belonged and made his way to the door.

On his way out the bulletin board caught his eye- some sort of conspiracy ad trying to talk about the existence of aliens and how they may be the true creator of the universe in an even bigger extraterrestrial plot. Sure thing Sir “ectoBiologist” whatever you say. Who _wouldn’t_ call your personal number which no doubt is the same number as your mom (whom you probably still live with) and talk all about aliens with you. Seems one person felt that way though. A single tab from the bottom of the sheet was missing. Hilarious.

Next to that was the usual- trucks for sale, lost dog, missing persons, community events, roommate wanted- Wait, jackpot!

He grabbed the flyer with both hands, not noticing how barbaric that was until he heard the sound of the pushpin fall to the floor. He quickly eyed around to make sure no one had seen, then reached down to pick it up and put the paper back where it belonged and read the flyer properly.

 

Alright, if the ironic use of clip art wasn’t enough to sell Dave, the screencapped from Word without even grammar checking and jpeg artifacts were. This guy had to be Dave’s fucking twin. Hell, Dave wouldn’t have been surprised if his own brother followed him up north and made this ad. It was just so fucking ridiculous and right up the Strider alley. It was a shining beacon of hope, and never before had he torn a tiny strip of paper off of anything faster than he did today.

He left the coffee shop in a hurry, throwing his feet onto the pedals of his bike and taking off into the street. He headed right back for the hotel, practically throwing himself up the stairs and into the door. The room was a disaster except where the maid had changed his sheets, but that was a problem for another day.

He sat up on his bed and brought up his knees, idly toying with his toes as he dialed the numbers into his iPhone and gnawed on his lip. God he hoped this guy was cool. He hoped this guy thought he was cool. Fuck.

“Hello, Jade speaking!!”

Holy shit, it was a girl and she sounded really cute. Fuck, that made it about 10 times worse and 10 times better.

“Uh,” he stammered- why was he calling again? “Hey.”

He heard her laugh a bit on the other end and he had to swallow. “Hi,” she replied, no doubt mocking his stalling.

“Yeah uh. I’m Dave, I saw your flyer about your summer room? I was hoping to come check the place out. Maybe tonight even?”

“The flyer? Oh my gosh, thank goodness. Hold on a minute. I’m actually the one moving out, you’ll have to talk to my roommate. I just picked up her phone because she’s in the bath. I’ll just bring the phone over!” Her voice got quiet and muffled but he could hear the no-doubt shouted “I’m coming in!”

Dave squinted while he tried to make out what the other girl was saying. Jade laughed, water sloshed and there was a quick “here she is!” before he could hear nothing but muffled noises as the phone was passed off.

Then girl number two spoke. Her voice was much deeper, much more enunciated, and much more intimidating. “This is Rose." 

“Hey Rose, this is Dave.”

Shit, was that going to come across as him mocking her?

“I don’t believe I know a Dave.”

Well that was kind of purposefully obtuse. He tried to laugh it off, turning his head and shoving a hand against it for a long rub.

“Right sorry yeah. I’m calling about the room you’re renting. I wanted to come take a look at the place I mean. Your ad was fucking hilarious. Flawless use of shitty clipart.”

He could hear the smile in her voice as the sound of water moving continued. “I’m glad you enjoyed it. Most other notes I’ve received were along the lines of how I need to work on my professionalism. Along with the odd comment doubting my sexuality and the insinuation that I'm a 'shrewd bitch.'”

Dave stalled for a minute- those were sort of some harsh things to hear over a poster. But she didn't seem too upset about it so maybe it wasn't even worth bothering with? “Not a lot of people really get that brand of irony. It’s pretty shitty, but hey, we’ll always have Asylum movies.”

Rose didn’t answer for a few moments, before he heard her mutter: “When would you like to come by?”

Fucking jackpot. Dave felt his heart leap in relief, overjoyed. Whatever weird irony test she had laid out, he totally fucking passed. Not only was that a good sign for him finding a place, it was a good sign that he would probably get along with this girl.

“As soon as possible. However long it takes you to finish your bath and get clothes on. Unless you prefer being naked in which case I’m fine with that too. I just could use your guidance on checking the place out.”

Rose chuckled warmly again and it made Dave feel like he was on fire. He kept it off his face like he usually did, but right now he couldn’t really lie to himself. He was way too ecstatic about finally having an ounce of hope.

“Well,” she started, the sound of the water getting louder as she no doubt stood up from the bath. “You just come straight to the address on the flier and I’ll try and scrounge up at least a nightgown.” 

Address on the flier? Fuck, Dave didn’t even see it let alone write it down. Well that’s no biggie, right?

“Sorry, I’m not actually in front of the flier I just took the number and ran. But if you give me the address now I’ll write it down and—“

“See you soon, Derek.”

The line went dead and Dave felt like his heart had just sunk into his stomach. Did she seriously just hang up on him? She expected him to go all the way back to the café to get the address?

Seriously?

As if he was going to do that. As if it was worth it. Her apartment was probably total shit and...

The only place he found in the past two weeks, god fucking damn it. He couldn’t just let it go. No matter how much the current tenant decided to make it a wild goose chase.

He heaved a loud sigh, glancing behind him at the clock on the bedside table. It was already six. Even if he took his car (which he really didn’t want to do; downtown parking was atrocious) he probably wouldn’t get back to the place on time. He could just go back tomorrow, but goddamn that was another fucking night in this hotel and even more hours that more places would get snatched up and hell, that place might have been one of them.

He laid down on his bed with a loud groan, grabbing a pillow and pulling it over his face. He yelled out into it loudly, fingernails gripping the down and legs kicking wildly at the mattress. Who the hell did this bitch think she was? Was her stupid clip art irony test not the only test he had to fucking pass? What was this, the fucking quest for the holy grail?

He silenced himself as he felt the mattress vibrate, removing the pillow and looking down where his phone was lit up again. He picked it up and—Low and behold, it was her. What? He hit answer with a loud inhale, already prepared. 

“You better fucking start by saying hanging up on me was an accident because if it wasn’t, I’m gonna have quite a fucking bone to pick with you.”

There was a sigh on the other end, but it wasn’t Rose’s voice at all.

“Dave, it’s Jade. Let me preface by saying you should probably not tell Rose that I called.”


	3. Chapter 3

Rose found herself being tickled awake the next morning, the tips of Jade’s hair brushing against her face. At first it was a nuisance to be woken up, but realizing the situation put a smile on her face. She looked up to where Jade’s eyes were sparkling their usual way, bright green and full of energy. Jade was always the early bird. This morning was no different.

Especially this morning.

“Almost time to go,” she whispered, her head ducking down quickly to give Rose’s cheekbone a quick peck. She then threw herself to the side, hair swinging with her as she hopped to the floor and out of the bed. Her t-shirt that had long since been shoved up to her collarbone fell back down, hiding her breasts but barely reaching her butt. Rose turned her head to admire it. Jade was toned with the way she hiked, muscular legs covered in month old stubble and a tight butt covered in her signature kiddish boyshorts. That was Jade, alright.

Rose closed her eyes again as she pointed her toes down, giving her legs and arms a stretch under the blankets. Her hand searched through the sheets for her buttons, pulling the flannel back over her chest and getting herself covered. Not that Jade hadn’t already seen everything there was to see, but Rose did have some tact about how she presented herself around the house.

“Are you sure you have to leave?” She asked, for the millionth time and still in vain. Jade offered a sympathetic smile over her shoulder, typing away at her phone.

“Positive. It’s not going to be so bad without me, you know that. Just. Quit being so negative all the time!” She finished up her message and tossed her phone to the desk, picking up the pair of pants she had laid out the night before. “I know you like to be realistic about things so you don’t get hurt, but you gotta trust me once in awhile!”

Her legs slid into her pants and she pulled off her top, replacing it with a tank top and pulling it down her stomach. Rose was already looking away though, not at all interested in the usual scolding she received from Jade. She’d heard it all before, but never found herself caring about changing. She was managing just fine the way she was. And that was because she had Jade to pour out all the optimism for her.

“Why are you even getting ready so early,” Rose offered, rolling onto her side and pulling a pillow against her chest. “Your flight doesn’t leave until ten and it’s only six.” She hid the bottom of her face as she watched Jade messily dab on lip gloss, tossing the tube in her bag and zipping it up. “Come cuddle with me more.”

Jade slowed her pace and looked back, smirking with a hopeless expression before outright grinning and waltzing over back to the bed. Rose rolled to lay on her back, smiling behind her pillow as Jade climbed on top of her and gave her forehead a wet smooch.

“You big baby. You don’t need me to cuddle with you. You’re 21 years old! You’re a big girl! I believe in yoooou!”

The two of them were reduced to giggles before Jade stood back up, fixing her hair and picking up her bag.

“I just have to run a few errands in town before I leave. Drop off my bike, drop off my essay, all that junk.”

Rose heaved a sigh as she sat up, letting the pillow fall and forcing up a smile. Fuck, this was not easy to hear or watch or experience.

“I’m going to miss you,” she admitted, wiping under her lip where she knew her lipstick had smudged. “You’re more than a roommate, you know that right?” As much as she tried to keep her cool her eyes were getting foggy. Jade kept her head ducked down while she adjusted her glasses, a telling, slow exhale escaping her lips. 

“Of course I know that,” she managed, her voice cracking slightly even through the chipper tone. “We’re best friends! And no amount of months apart is going to make that any different. Four months from now I’m going to be the one laying in that bed while you make tea and it’ll be like nothing was ever different in the first place. I promise!” 

Rose stayed quiet until she gave a nod to her head, pushing up a wide smile and climbing off the mattress. She should really be getting back into her own bed, but she preferred this one. It smelled better.

She opened her arms as she headed over, grabbing Jade up for a hug. Jade was eager to return it, mumbling on about how silly it was for them to be so sad and how it was only a few months and how they’d still chat online everyday and Rose just told her it didn’t matter.

Eventually they managed to pry themselves apart, and Rose walked Jade to the door. She dragged her bag out to the hallway with her helmet in her other hand.

“Promise me you won’t turn away any opportunities, alright? I’m warning you, Rose. Take a chance on something! Have an adventure! Okay?”

Rose just nodded, watching Jade disappear down the hallway and closing the door when she was out of sight. She hit the lock on the door before dropping her head against it, taking one last moment to wallow in self pity before standing up tall, turning herself around and marching straight back into Jade’s bedroom to climb back into bed and wallow in some more self pity.

It was only a bit of wallowing before she was simply falling back asleep, cuddled up against Jade’s pillow with an arm squeezing it close. Yeah, she could probably spend every night like this. That sounded like the best possible course of action.

 

“Hello?”

The hooded mistress lifted her head. The clack of bones indicated the arrival of a customer, the door of her shop clattering against her homemade wind chime. She smiled as he entered, deep violet eyes piercing through him. He appeared to be a normal adventurer at first glance. Not noble or particularly rich. But he could still be used.

“Welcome,” she purred, moving out from behind the counter. Her extended sleeves dangled from her arms, waterfalls of black silk dripping near to the floor. “What brings you to my shop today?”

“Is anybody home?”

The woman paused. Was he ignoring her? She cleared her throat, trying to smile politely. He looked so puzzled, staring right at her like no normal peasant boy should be able to. “I’m right here. And this isn’t a home, it’s a magic shop. Spells, potions...”

“Rose?”

Suddenly a stronger force was weighing her down. She felt a pain shoot up her chest, her entire body stiffening. Rose. Who was Rose? How...? Her vision began to blur as she gripped at her head. She sunk to the floor, eyes squeezing shut until the blackness turned into swirls of purple.

 

Rose’s eyes started fluttering as she woke up, staring at the far wall where Jade’s bulletin board was nearly cleared off aside from a photo of her and her old dog. Elsewhere in the apartment a door slammed shut in the wind of an open window. She closed her eyes in the hopes that she might fall back asleep, but it didn’t work. Admitting defeat she finally crawled out of bed, dragging herself into the shower to wipe off last night’s sweat.

Washed dried and brushed she found herself back in Jade’s room, carefully peeling posters off the wall and rolling them up, stacking them in a storage bin along with photo frames and notebooks. Jade had taken most of her clothing with her so aside from a winter jacket and suit in the closet, the room was already pretty empty. After stripping the bed and vacuuming the floor, the entire bedroom was ready for a new tenant. As much as she didn’t want one.

Rose carried out the dirtied sheets and dropped them in her own hamper, her eyes traveling across the room searching for the lid to it. Her bedroom wasn’t nearly as tidy as Jade’s was, and considering the fact that Jade was a messy person, that was saying something. Eventually though she found it, (along with 20 other articles of dirty clothing that could use a wash) and carried the basket into the hall. Might as well try and make this place seem at the very least _presentable._

She honestly wouldn’t have minded if the guy from the other night called back. If only because having a roommate who would cozy in for a night of _Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus_ and _Nazis from Outer Space_ had to be the best deal she was ever going to find. But there was nothing more effective in bruising a man’s ego than calling him by the wrong name. Rose had gained a lot of power with a lot of people using that method.

Locking her door behind her Rose dragged her basket to the elevator, starting her way down to the bottom floor and to the laundry room. There were only a few washers and driers there sure and it was all coin paying, but it was a nice atmosphere. When working on fanfics Rose had brought her laptop to this laundry room many a time to write the grungy, dark scenes. It was a nice vibe.

Today it was as empty as usual aside from some young guy that was presumably using the washing machine as his own personal massage chair, mouthing hanging open while he shielded his eyes with sunglasses. Rose scoffed a bit when he didn’t move upon her entrance- he must have been asleep sitting up there.

She found herself observing him after she had put her laundry on. A grey hood pulled up over blond hair with the sleeves pushed up on his forearms and the zipper all the way open. He was wearing a vintage _Coca Cola_ shirt that no doubt came from Target, and his 1990’s Nike Slides stuffed overtop white athletic socks were far from appealing. Especially paired with knee length black shorts that showed off dark legs even further covered by black, wiry leg hair.

She’d need to write about this guy sometime soon. What’s his story? A traveling musician? A failed comedian? Or just an odd homosexual that likes to sleep in Laundromats just to steal everyone’s left socks. Yes, that sounded about right.

More than amused she headed back upstairs, swearing to herself that she’d start this story. Give this stranger a backstory that included an abusive father and a nerdy ex-boyfriend, maybe one who obsessed over the occult, or a rom-com enthusiast. Movies he liked genuinely while Coke-Shirt lamented about how awful they were. But they were still in love, right up until his perfect boyfriend climbs back into the closet. Sorry, Coke-Shirt. We’ve all felt what you’re feeling. You can win him over again. Don’t lose hope. 

Of course by the time she arrived back in her apartment the story was already boring her, and she opted instead to send a quick email to her boss about picking up more shifts before moving right into tidying up again. It wasn’t as though Rose actually _cleaned_ of course. Just moved everything into a pile and left the pile until Jade needed something out of it and finally put it all away herself.

She arranged the herbs Jade had been growing in the window seat, filled up the dishwasher, stacked up letters and pay stubs. There was also a rejection letter mixed in with the pile from a query agent that she needed to add to her collection.

After the fifth rejection she decided to stop taking them to heart. She had started a scrapbook of them in 11th grade. She wasn’t about to stop the tradition now. In fact, she should be receiving another one soon. Her last manuscript went out last month to an agent based in Canada. But unfortunately within the entire book there was no mention of moose or beavers, so she wasn’t keeping her fingers crossed.

When she returned to the Laundromat to move over her clothes, Coke-Shirt had seemingly moved. A bit of snooping told her that his clothes were still in the washer—What in the world was that God awful pixelated eyeball that just stared up at her? Of course if he was coming back, she didn’t want to get caught, so her question went unanswered as she slammed the washer shut and moved away from it. She instead marched herself right back to the elevator, adrenaline settling as she relaxed against the back wall.

God, she was hopelessly abnormal when she was alone.


	4. Chapter 4

The irony of the situation really didn’t hit Dave at all until Jade had said the words “Well, I have to go catch my flight.”

Of course she wasn’t there for a date, you obtuse moron. Why would he ever think for one minute crushing on her had any point? He was literally meeting her to take her bedroom at her old apartment.

_“You’ve got the place, I promise. I’ve watched Rose take every call she received from that flyer and not one of them ended nicely. She actually smiled talking to you. She doesn’t offer those up for everyone.”_

That’s what she had said to him over the phone the other night, and he had been eagerly listening as he laid curled up on his hotel bed. He finally found a place. Even if he apparently was going to have a roommate to tiptoe around, who cared? He would probably barely ever be home anyway. He still had to make a living, and attend classes. 

He was ecstatic. Not that it really showed by looking at him, but. It was definitely there. He could feel it like an uncomfortable coiling and tugging in his stomach. Anxiety about a new home but the good kind.

Jade asked him to meet her for coffee before he moved in so she could give him his key and let him know “how this was going to work.” At the time she didn’t elaborate, but when it came time to meeting her, she got down to business with it.

“Rose can be particular,” she had warned, stirring her coffee clockwise while her forearm propped her up on the table. “She isn’t going to be happy that you’re there. She might try and play mind games with you to convince you to give in and move out, but trust me, she isn’t going to hurt you. She just wants to make sure you’re a worthy adversary. If she really, truly dislikes you, she would just leave. But she won’t.”

“Sounds interesting. I’m sure it’s nothing I can’t handle. I grew up with an older brother so I’m used to that kind of bullshit.”

That sounded like a troublesome obstacle to overcome, if he had to admit it. He didn’t want to give up, especially not at the hands of a temper tantruming woman. But he might have to if these mind games were inconvenient enough. He did have a _life_ to deal with.

Jade paused for a second while she put her spoon to the side, biting back what seemed to be a sigh.

“Let me rephrase that... Please, don’t give up on her." 

Dave tried not to laugh off her change of tone, leaning back in his seat. “Oh, okay, that’s a bit different of a deal. I mean. Not in a “what are you going to pay me” way but. You know what’s the secret? I should probably know, right?”

Jade seemed to mull it over. She took a few sips of her drink and chewed on her lip a little and looked at her fingernails. “I’m not sure how to explain without making Rose sound crazy. Because she’s not! She’s totally normal and perfectly fun she’s just... She’s very... obsessive compulsive. She likes things to go according to a plan. And if ever something strays from that plan she needs to be in charge of it. The front runner of the fuck up. Excuse my language.”

Dave scoffed; that was cute. 

“But that’s sort of what this is!” She insisted, sides of her hands flat to the table as her fingers pointed toward him. “You are the deviation from the plan, and if you let her have control, you’re going to be out of that apartment by tomorrow. You need to... I don’t know, challenge her without dominating her. Show her you intend to fight back but you aren’t a threat to her way of life. I’m so sorry this probably makes no sense and is just creepy.” She dropped her head into her hands, fingers tugging at her bangs.

Dave shrugged his shoulders, knocking her leg with his foot in a way that might come across as accidental. “It’s not that creepy,” he answered, picking up a hash brown from his plate and nudging it back to his molars. “You care about your friend and you want to make sure I know how to handle her so she’s not on her own. I’m guessing it happens a lot? Where she shoves people away because they aren’t challenging enough or interesting enough?”

The look of sympathy on Jade’s face almost broke his heart. He hit the nail on the head and from the looks of things, Jade here hadn’t had a single person ever actually know what it’s like and what she goes through. She looked down at her lap, twirling her thumbs. “I can’t remember the last time she had a steady relationship with someone that she didn’t have to push away because they weren’t smart enough for her. I thought one girl was coming close but. She was too nosy about alcohol.”

Woah wait- girl? He sure never assumed this Rose girl was gay but. Hey that explained her weird all-inclusive LGBT friendly poster. 

“I guess it comes down to not being too polite,” he tried, watching her face to gauge for the reaction. “Don’t put up with her shit, but don’t outright tell her off either.”

“Exactly,” Jade answered, exasperation in her tone. She must have been hells of relieved. Dave was glad he could make that happen. “Play along with her and let her know you’re her equal. Rose can be childish and passive aggressive but. That’s just how she gets to know people. Just.” 

That’s when she reached for his hand, grabbing it in both of hers and giving it a squeeze. “I know she’s going to be difficult and I’m sorry for the years of enabling I’ve done but please, _please_ don’t give up on her. I don’t know if she can handle being by herself. She needs some sort of support there for when things go wrong. Someone to take out her worries on. She needs a friend.”

Dave was a bit taken aback, suddenly starting to feel that creepy she was describing before. Not creepy enough that he was going to walk away, but. Creepy enough that he was a little concerned for what exactly was going on between these two. If one of them was gay...

“Relax,” he answered, moving his hand over to pat one of hers where she was still gripping him. “I got this. It’s not that big of a deal. I’m sure you’re just worried because you’re going away. It won’t be nearly as bad as you think. How much damage can one girl do?”

Jade took a deep breath and nodded her head. She then smiled, taking her hands back and wiping her eyes under her glasses. Why, he didn’t know. She wasn’t crying.

“You’re right,” she said decidedly, finishing up her coffee. “I’m just paranoid being so far away. It’s going to be fine. Thank you, Dave. And you’ve got my number and my screenname if anything goes wrong so don’t be a stranger.”

He had to push up some sort of smile. If only to ease her nerves. “I definitely will not be one of those.” 

Then she was up, a 10 dollar bill left on the table for their meals. Before she could make it through the door he called her back, wanting to give making a good impression one more shot.

“By the way,” he started, clearing his throat through the crack in his voice and trying to sound confident. “Sorry for making an ass of myself when I called. I didn’t expect a girl to pick up.”

Something was off about her smile. Her eyes were narrow, like she was angry but didn’t want to show it.

“I’m not a girl,” she stated plainly. “It’s alright though. It’s an easy mistake to make.”

She left before he could even get his foot out of his mouth. His jaw was hanging open, confused and embarrassed. She… _wasn’t_ a girl? What else could she be? Unless… What did they call it? A trans?

He picked at his hashbrowns a little longer while he mulled it over, before he turned to look out the café window, distracted with admiring his car filled to the roof with boxes. He could see Jade at her bike parked right in front of him, sliding her helmet on. Damn, that was cool even by his standards.

When he stood up to leave, he ended up letting out a loud yawn. It was going to be a long fucking day. Especially when he already had to start it at seven in the morning. He barely had any clean laundry so he ended up throwing on whatever bullshit he could find, which looked terrible and probably smelled worse. But as long as it covered him up he shouldn’t be complaining. Even if advertising for Coca Cola was so 2004.

 

It still felt awkward going to the building. Jade gave him the address, even drew him a map that told him which parking space to use.

 

(It wasn’t quite as ironic as Rose’s toothpaste clip-art poster, but it was cute enough to appreciate.)

Still though, looking up at the glass door of the building’s entrance and putting an unfamiliar key in the lock was a weird feeling. Stepping into the elevator was a weird feeling. Hitting the 4 button was a weird feeling. And when he got to the fourth floor, everything just felt wrong. Still though he continued, navigating the hallway until he got to the right apartment. 

Taking a deep breath he lifted a fist, knocking gently on the door. He could hear his heartbeat in his ears, a loud thrum playing along with his pulse. Fuck, this shouldn’t make him so nervous. It was just a girl with control issues. He’d dealt with so, so much worse. There was no reason to be so worried.

After a couple minutes of silence, he was starting to calm down. He gave another knock to the door, pressing his ear up against it. Didn’t sound like anyone was getting up. No one yelled “Be right there!” and he couldn’t even hear running water to indicate a shower. Nope, it was just silent.

He carefully reached into his pocket for the door key. Dear God, please let Rose not be home. Please, please, _please_ let her not be home. The key slid into the lock perfectly, and it turned with ease, and with a click of the knob, the door was slowly moving open.

The place was a fucking mess, first and foremost. It was all open, sure. Bay window in the back left, the seat riddled with soil and newspaper and plants. Really? Why would you ruin a great sitting area with that? Whatever. A couple more windows were along the back wall: one over the kitchen sink, full of dirty dishes and the counter around it covered in paper and letters; one behind the couch, similarly riddled with remotes and controllers and crumbs. The TV in front of it had a stack of dvds out of their cases... It was a fucking nightmare.

“Hello?”

He took a few cautious steps into the carpet, glancing around as he entered. There was another door to the left, and a hallway over to the right. He still couldn’t hear a shower running. But glancing at the coat hooks next to him, it was pretty obvious that someone was either home, or owned way too many coats.

“Is anybody home?”

Still no answer. He supposed it was possible she was downstairs, maybe doing laundry or grabbing something from the vending machine. Went for a jog or ran to Starbucks. Well, one more shot.

“Rose?" 

He listened hard, but there was no response beyond silence. Guess she really wasn’t home. 

He backed his way out of the apartment, closing and locking the door behind him. He didn’t exactly want to move all of his stuff in while she wasn’t around. That probably would be too much shock on someone who was apparently already way too sensitive about having a new roommate. He could wait until she was back so he could properly introduce himself. He didn’t have much to do and he didn’t really want to put up his stand when he was dressed like this but... Well, he did have the key, so he did have access to the Laundromat.

So began laundry day. He poured his hamper out into one of the washers, shoving the door shut with all his weight while he awkwardly tried to slide coins into the slot. He had way too much clothing and did not give enough of a shit to separate any of it. Basically every laundry day went like this. But hey, it got his clothes clean, so why would he bitch about it?

Hopping up on the washer he slid himself back so he was against the wall, bringing up his legs and pulling his phone out. He sent Jade a quick text to brief her on the current situation but when there was no response, it was apparent that she had already gotten on the plane.

With a slow exhale he leaned his head back, closing his eyes and relaxing with the vibration below him. He ended up yawning again and before he knew it, he was falling asleep. He wasn’t sure what he was dreaming about. Darkness, red and blue pillars, panic, fear, a countdown. The only sense of security being a sturdy red rock he was standing on and the company of someone he didn’t know, but somehow knew? 

His eyes slowly opened the moment the clock reached zero, realizing how his mouth was hanging open and the corners of his lips were glazed in drool. He inhaled slowly as he lifted his head. It couldn’t have been a long nap- maybe 10 minutes at most. His washer was still going. Someone had put their laundry on too in the time he was asleep. Fuck, that was embarrassing. 

He should go check up on Rose. But he was still nervous about it. Nervous enough that he decided going to Starbucks to write some more would be a better option. He abandoned his washing machine, returned to his car, dug his laptop bag out of the trunk and headed down the sidewalk. He had to come to a Starbucks eventually.

Which he did, and he got plenty of writing done. But by the time his fuse was reaching its end, he found himself four hours later. It was lunch time, and he was left at an impasse of what he should do for it. Inviting Rose out would be nice. Maybe if he dropped the ball on her out in public she’d be less likely to have a fit about it. But would that be taking too much control like Jade had warned him? Making her feel trapped?

Well, he could always ask.

 

DAVE STRIDER [12:13PM]: hey toothpaste  
DAVE STRIDER [12:13PM]: what do you say we have lunch together   
DAVE STRIDER [12:13PM]: no funny business  
DAVE STRIDER [12:14PM]: i just have to know your fucking secret   
DAVE STRIDER [12:14PM]: the secret being “why the fuck did she choose toothpaste”  
DAVE STRIDER [12:15PM]: dont leave me hanging rose i gotta know  
DAVE STRIDER [12:15PM]: this has been eating at me for days  
DAVE STRIDER [12:16PM]: im like the fucking green guy on spongebob  
DAVE STRIDER [12:16PM]: gotta get the formula  
DAVE STRIDER [12:17PM]: the formula for perfect irony  
DAVE STRIDER [12:17PM]: this is some colonel sanders level shit right here   
DAVE STRIDER [12:18PM]: why the fuck is that pronounced kernel  
DAVE STRIDER [12:18PM]: should be like call oh nell  
DAVE STRIDER [12:18PM]: call o’neil  
DAVE STRIDER [12:18PM]: shaquille o’neil  
DAVE STRIDER [12:18PM]: i cracked the code  
DAVE STRIDER [12:20PM]: so lunch y/n?????  
ROSE LALONDE [12:21PM]: If I say yes will you stop texting me.  
DAVE STRIDER [12:22PM]: no promises  
ROSE LALONDE [12:24PM]: Where would you like to meet.  
DAVE STRIDER [12:24PM]: i was thinking your place  
DAVE STRIDER [12:25PM]: ill bring chinese take out  
ROSE LALONDE [12:25PM]: You are not coming here for lunch.  
DAVE STRIDER [12:26PM]: too late im already on my way  
ROSE LALONDE [12:27PM]: How would you even know where to come?  
DAVE STRIDER [12:28PM]: you told me to go back for the flyer i went back for the flyer  
ROSE LALONDE [12:29PM]: Had you have actually gone back for the flyer you would know as well as I do that the flyer didn’t have an address on it.  
DAVE STRIDER [12:30PM]: so you lied to me  
DAVE STRIDER [12:30PM]: damn thats harsh  
ROSE LALONDE [12:31PM]: That’s who I am. A big old rotten bitch.   
DAVE STRIDER [12:33PM]: you arent a bitch  
DAVE STRIDER [12:34PM]: you just like specific types of people   
DAVE STRIDER [12:34PM]: nothing wrong with that  
DAVE STRIDER [12:35PM]: hold on im on my way upstairs   
ROSE LALONDE [12:36PM]: What?  
ROSE LALONDE [12:36PM]: Dave what are you talking about.   
DAVE STRIDER [12:37PM]: knock knock

 

Of course, he didn’t actually bother knocking. He balanced his take out bag on his knee with his shoulder bag still slung across his chest, sliding his key in the door and opening it up. He headed in without a care, glancing around the room. Sure enough Rose was seated on the couch- had it gotten cleaner in here?- looking up from her Blackberry with a stare of utter disbelief. Dave played up a smirk, making a show of tossing his keys ceremoniously into the key bowl next to the door.

“What’s up, roomie.”


	5. Chapter 5

Rose was not happy. In fact, if she had to take a guess, she would say this was probably the most unhappy she had ever been in her entire life. Not only was some stranger holding the key to her home, it was goddamn Coke Shirt, the guy who’s first impression was literally “poorly dressed sleeping bum.” 

“I beg your _unbelievable_ pardon,” she said flatly, trying to keep her cool as she set her phone to the side. “I don’t believe we’ve met, let alone spoken about you _living_ here.” 

But Dave was suave in the way he moved. He entered without permission, moving across the room to put his take-out bag on the kitchen table and starting to dig stuff out of it. Was this honestly happening?

“We sort of have,” he refuted, spinning on his heel toward the counters and starting to nose through drawers. “I’m Dave, remember? Called a few days ago. I made the arrangements with Jade because she said something about how you were totally in love with me the moment you heard how cool and manly my voice was and that you swore off women forever so I should probably live with you so you don’t die alone.”

A fork twirled around his fingers as he retrieved it. Jesus, he moved like some strange samurai dancer. It was unnatural and stupid and intriguing. She couldn’t avoid the way her face flushed as she watched him. She was determined to keep her cool though, so despite wanting to jump to her feet and scream, she maintained her composure and narrowed her eyes.

“I said nothing of the sort. I said you sounded nice and reasonably intelligent.”

The way Dave paused with his back turned to her put her on red alert, her own back straightening, her head ducking, and an impulsive inhale expanding her chest. But she got her control back, licking her bottom lip quickly and keeping her eyes on him. She couldn’t let him have the upper hand, here. And getting emotional was definitely giving him the upper hand. If she really wanted to get rid of him, she would have to make sure he knew that she wasn’t bothered by his presence in the slightest.

But then he turned around to face her. His eyes were still hidden by those god-awful sunglasses, but his lips had pulled back into a smirk. How did a boy dressed like that get lips that pink and freckles that clean in the first place.

“You said that about me? Damn. All I heard was that you smiled while we were on the phone.” Fuck, that definitely gave him an advantage. But Rose wasn’t going to give up that quickly.

“I’m polite on impulse and by nature. I’ve made a habit of always smiling during conversations with prospective clients, even if I have nothing visual to offer. I wouldn’t flatter yourself with that.”

She finally managed to stand, nonchalantly brushing her sleeves down her arms. She really wasn’t sure what she should do, though. Somehow, she didn’t feel safe walking by him, even if he was reasonably normal. Her only other option was to retreat back into her room, which would definitely be weak. So instead she approached, cautiously, but stayed at the other end of the table from him, fingers gripping around the back of one of the chairs as she struggled to keep eye contact.

“Prospective... Clients,” was his response, as he slid over a takeout box to her end of the table and tossed a package of chopsticks. “You mean potential roommates and friends are clients to you?”

Rose gave her head a stern swoop to move her hair out of her face, not reaching for his food and refusing to take a seat. “You weren’t a potential roommate or a potential friend. I had no intention of speaking to you again. So you were a client.”

Dave apparently had no trouble looking right at her, opening up his own box and starting to rifle through it with his fork. “How was I supposed to be a client if you never spoke to me again? Kinda defeats the purpose? So either you’re really shitty at actually dealing with clients, or you liked that I knew the Asylum. Speaking of which.”

In the midst of her disbelief she was shown a DVD case, a familiar cover staring back at her. Had he actually bought _Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus_ for two dollars at the Chinese market?

“Figured we could start with the classics then work our way down. You better not have been fucking with me with the irony thing. Because if you genuinely believed that toothpaste clip art was going to find you a roommate that also liked clipart, you were sorely mistaken." 

Rose was flabbergasted. Not only did he flip that into a complete 180 on her, he was actually pulling off being a bearable person. Was that even possible? She didn’t have any snark left in her. She stayed silent as he put his case down and started to eat, gesturing with a nod of his head for her to join him.

Slowly she took a seat, peeling back the lid on the cover and tearing apart the package for her chopsticks. This was stupidly surreal. Not only had she been bested, she was actually... _Giving in._ She had to make sure this didn’t become a habit. She couldn’t let this continue. No way.

She ate in silence as Dave rattled on. He talked about some old woman at the market that was slow with her purchase but had a really hilarious shirt on, he talked about his first experience with Chinese food, he just talked. And talked. And _talked_. After a while Rose had finally gained her composure, pushing her food aside and sitting forward slightly.

“Why don’t you use chopsticks?” She asked, watching the way he pulled the fork prongs between his lips. “Seems like something you would do in a seemingly ironic fashion.”

Dave put down his fork and lifted up his hand, holding it out for her and pointing to a small scar under his ring finger.

“Doesn’t bend. Can’t hold the things. My brother and I tended to fuck around with swords growing up since we were stupid and really fucking cool and this is one of the things that happened.”

Rose hesitated, her gaze flashing away for a moment. “One of?”

Dave didn’t seem to catch on to her letting her guard down, just prattled on about broken lamps and the time he had to get stitches and a bird he managed to skewer. He was a good story teller. But she couldn’t bring herself to enjoy any of the tales, her anxiety still bubbling in the back of her brain like a cauldron.

“So,” he said eventually, sitting back in his seat and moving his hands behind his head. “Now that we’ve established that I am going to be living here, is there anything we need to talk about? Do you shower mornings or nights? You wanna make a grocery pool and we can shop together with the budget? Will I be needing to give you rides anywhere? I have a car.”

Rose really didn’t want to listen to this. She didn’t want to hear it, she didn’t want to think about it, she certainly didn’t want to discuss it. Fuck. Fuck Dave, fuck this entire thing, and fuck Jade for leaving in the first place.

“I. Don’t need rides from you. I have a perfectly fine bus pass. I’ll buy my own groceries, you can buy yours. I’ll make my own meals and supply my own alcohol. I shower in the mornings because I like being clean first thing.”

Dave was condescending to say the least about his reaction. Hands up defensively, avoiding eye contact, clearly trying to nudge something out from between his teeth with his tongue.

“That’s cool. I can’t buy you booze anyway. I’m only twenty.”

Rose paused, slowly raising her gaze to look at him. She couldn’t help herself as she started to grin, matching his look of condescension. “You’re... Only twenty?" 

Now he was sweating, swallowing a bit and sinking lowering in his seat. “Yeah? So what.”

“When’s the last time you drank, Dave?” She leaned forward, weaving her fingers together and dropping her chin down on her hands. Oh, this was interesting.

“Like... I don’t know, a few months ago?"

“So New Years. While you were presumably back home with your brother.”

“Oh come on, who cares when I last drank. Getting drunk isn’t even cool. It’s just messy and uncomfortable and it hurts in the morning. What I’m saying is it’s basically anal sex. That’s what it is.”

Rose only grinned wider. “I’m assuming you’ve had a lot of that to know how much it hurts.” 

The only noise he was making was embarrassed sputtering, probably pretty damn thankful for his hidden eyes now. Rose was back on top, closing her eyes in pride and resting back.

“I have not! I like _women._  And _only_  women. I don’t know how much anal sex hurts.” Standing up from the table, Rose collected their trays to throw out, dropping his fork into the sink with all the rest of the dishes waiting there. Oh, this was too much fun now.

“Only liking women has nothing to do with it. I’ve penetrated plenty of men before. You never know, you might like it if you give it a shot.”

“Nope, nope, all done talking about this. Excellent to meet you, Rose, you’re a real joy. Please stay away from my ass.”

He kept himself firmly seated. Rose had to admire the dedication. “Well if you change your mind, you know where to find me.”

Dave continued with his huffing and puffing as Rose gave the dishes a lazy rinse, still not in the mood to actually wash them. Eventually though he spoke up, with an awkward and quiet, “I thought you were _gay_ anyway why would you want to sleep with me.”

Rose scoffed as she moved back into the living room, returning to her seat and picking up her phone. “Who told you I was gay?”

He looked like he was mulling it over, eventually deciding on, “Well Jade said you had an ex-girlfriend I just assumed.”

“I have plenty of ex-girlfriends,” she answered, putting her phone aside and replacing it with her laptop. “I also have plenty of ex-boyfriends. Please don’t tell me you honestly believe the B in the LGBT acronym stands for bacon.”

It seemed to click with him. That was good enough for her. He got up from his seat and waltz over, hands in his pockets. “Well yeah sure. Lettuce guacamole bacon and tomato my favorite sandwich.”

She couldn’t hold back her snort, giving her head a shake as she read through the reply from her boss. Seems like she would now be doing night shift five days a week instead of three. Good enough for her.

“So uh,” he started, pulling off his sweater and tossing it next to her on the couch. God his outfit was fucking terrible. At least he had a load of laundry downstairs. “We gonna move me in, or are you going to call the cops and have me arrested.”

Rose considered it quickly. It seemed they were now in the position where if she told him to get lost, he would. Some sincere quiet moment where she could let her guard down and not feel like she was trapped in some game. She felt sort of. Safe. Playing the get rid of him game with this guy might actually be decently fun. Maybe he wouldn’t give up so quickly like everyone else always did. 

“You can stay,” she said finally, quietly and almost to herself. “Why don’t you put your laundry in the dryer while I change into something more appropriate for moving boxes.”

And by that of course she meant that she couldn’t possibly leave the building and risk being seen in her laundry day clothes.

“Oh yeah,” he said, seemingly only now remembering he had put laundry on in the first place. “I’ll go do that while you get... ...Changed.”

She glanced over her shoulder when he stalled, having started her way back to her room. “Something wrong?”

“How did you know I had laundry on?” he asked, a single eyebrow peaking above those glasses. Damn, those were bushy. “You aren’t psychic are you because I think that it should be written in some sort of disclosure agreement that you aren’t allowed to use magic powers against roommates.”

Rose had to admire his imagination. She smiled a bit to herself as she turned around, continuing to her door. “No powers. I just put mine on while you were asleep on the washing machine.” She didn’t wait around for his reaction. She could already gauge that it would be embarrassed and dumbfounded. That was always a given with people she one-upped. Especially, it seemed, with this guy.

Disappearing into her room she dumped her hamper out on her bed, tossing clean laundry to the floor as she dismissed it. Eventually she had thrown aside a complete outfit, and slid into it along with pushing her hair up into a small ponytail. When she left her room the door was hanging open, and Dave was carrying in his first of likely many boxes.

“So,” he asked, an exasperated exhale leaving him as he dropped the box on the floor. He certainly didn’t work out much, did he? “Which room is mine, exactly?" 

“I would hazard to call it yours,” she replied, carefully, surveying his response as she got closer to him. His mouth was flat, but he gave a nod to his head as if he was expecting that response. Damn, did Jade fill him in on her get-rid-of-them game? “But, it’s the second door down the hall there. Come on.”

She moved past him and toward Jade’s bedroom, hesitating for a moment before nudging the door open. It wasn’t as if she was scared of walking in there. She had remade the bed after the laundry was done and cleared the room out- she knew what it looked like. But she still hadn’t truly _adjusted_ to what it looked like yet. Sure enough her heart felt heavy when the door swung open. The walls were barren, the bed was made like Jade’s hardly ever was, her desk had been cleared off aside from a pencil cup of basic supplies, the carpet was cleared off, even her bookshelf was mostly empty aside from a couple of Squiddles on the top shelf sitting next to a few nuclear physics textbooks that Rose couldn’t reach, let alone carry.

She stood aside so Dave could carry in his box, wincing a bit as he unceremoniously dropped it on the floor. “Not so bad,” was his verdict, looking around and grazing his fingers on the sheets as if testing the thread count. “Needs some personal touches, but I got all that in here.” His toes pressed against his box as he kicked it. Rose was beginning to feel sick to her stomach.

“Yes. Well. You’re more than welcome to _vandalize_ this room as much as you please. Have at it.” She made sure to couple her warning with a sneer, moving out of the room much more calmly. If this boy didn’t show some respect for the space she was giving him, she was going to make his life a living hell. She turned round when she noticed he wasn’t following her, speaking up so her voice carried. “Dave, we should bring everything up before you unpack. That way I can at least start dinner while you do.”

Dave made sure to hit the light on his way out- good- and almost tripped as he tried to dodge his box at the same time. What a sight. “Oh, so now you're going to make me meals?”

Rose just smirked, tilting her head a bit to observe him. She would cook for him, obviously. She wasn’t accustomed to cooking for one anyway, and he _did_ already take care of one meal for her. But. Why let him know he’s got a free ride when she could make it difficult on him instead?

“I didn’t say anything about making you meals,” she answered flatly, turning around again and moving toward the door. Check.

“Yeah, but you didn’t say anything about not making them either. I’d say there’s still some hope. I’m willing to bet you’re just trying to psych me out with all this lone wolf crap to see if I buy it or not. Meanwhile I’m going to make my own shitty mac and cheese and you’re going to have a steak that you just throw out with a snooty little, “oh, well I never said I _wasn’t_ going to make you anything” and a smirk. You just correct me if I’m wrong.”

She stalled in the doorway, gaze flashing toward him quickly before she moved out of the apartment. She considered a response, but she found herself unable to come up with one.

Checkmate.


	6. Chapter 6

So, Rose was definitely as much of a handful as Jade had warned him. Although, she wasn’t quite as good at it as he thought she was going to be. Banter with her was pretty easy. Showing her up was easy. And from the way she was reacting every time he showed her up, she wasn’t feeling threatened. Just challenged. Which is exactly what Jade advised him to do. Yeah it was tedious and it was a lot of work, but it wasn’t difficult.

He was curious about Rose. The reasons behind her attitude and why she acted the way she did and what she was really like once you passed her weird tests and she took her guard down. He wanted to imagine them just watching a movie together, where she was just relaxed and laughing and real with no bitchy retorts or pretending to be too good for fun. Just legitimately enjoying herself. Was that a thing he could dig his way to if he tried? If he stopped playing along, would there be a way to get her to be real? Or would she just get bored and find a way to kick him out like Jade had warned.

Decidedly, it was too early to tell. He put those thoughts to rest for the time being, focusing on his castle of boxes he was now surrounded by in his new bedroom. It was definitely empty in there. The bedspread was way too girly for his taste and the walls were almost lonely with plain white paint and not so much as a photo hanging up. The closet was remarkably roomy, too; nothing but one storage bin marked “J” sitting at the bottom of it. He probably wouldn’t even need this much room, if he had to guess.

Once he got started with his unpacking though, it was a different story. His photo equipment took up the entire desk as he would have assumed. He only needed one shelf on the bookcase for his books, but with his camera, some of his formaldehyde jars from back home, and stacks upon stacks of records, it was full. The closet filled up with clothes once his dryer was done, the walls were covered in all his posters from back home, and he propped a few of his swords up on the corner. Probably wouldn’t be needing them, but, they were still nice to have around.

All that was left was his sound equipment. He really didn’t want to leave it in the living room. Mixing in front of people just made him self-conscious and he could only expect it would be even worse with someone like Rose who would probably criticize every scratch trying to be “funny” with her stupid games. But there wasn’t room for it in the bedroom, either. He couldn’t put the photo equipment in the living room since it would be impossible to make that room pitch black. Fuck, this sucked. He didn’t want to just not make music, but by the looks of things, he wasn’t going to have much of an option.

He set his laptop up at the foot of his bed- he likely wouldn’t be needing his desk for it anyway- and woke it up. Pesterchum opened the moment his wifi was set up, a new request from gardenGnostic waiting to be accepted. He did so happily and hey, she was even online.

 

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 05:56PM --

TG: hey stranger  
GG: hello  
GG: wait is this dave?? :o  
TG: sure is im glad you remember me  
GG: well im not about to forget you!!!  
GG: we just talked like less than 12 hours ago! :P   
GG: wait are you already with rose??  
GG: oh god please tell me youre ok  
TG: yeah everythings fine  
TG: i dunno i like her  
TG: her attempts at riling me up are kinda cute  
TG: shes really bad at it  
TG: i feel like she might be slacking on purpose??  
TG: i just aint feeling the disdain  
GG: well have you been fighting back at all?  
TG: yeah  
TG: haha like i made a crack about how if she says  
TG: ‘i never said i was going to make you food’  
TG: that means she was going to she just didnt say so  
TG: so if i made myself food  
TG: she would have also made me food  
TG: and would have made a show of throwing it out  
TG: just to make me look stupid  
TG: she wouldnt even talk to me after that hahaha  
GG: hmmmmmmmmmm.....  
TG: whats hmm  
TG: is that a good hmm or a bad hmm  
GG: hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm  
TG: come on dont leave me hanging here  
GG: hmmmmmmmmmmm!!!!!!!  
TG: stop fucking saying hmm  
GG: I think you are doing really well from the sounds of things!!  
TG: well yeah i could have told you that  
GG: just remember she is a person with feelings too, ok??  
TG: yeah ok  
TG: i was actually wondering about that  
TG: like how much do i have to do for her to stop toying around  
TG: and just like being my friend  
GG: well thats.... a bit more complicated :/  
GG: rose has it in her head that no one wants to be her friend because you know shes spent so long playing around like this  
GG: and everyone just gets tired of it  
GG: so if you want her to accept you as a friend you have to  
GG: i dunno prove to her that you really do want to be her friend!!!  
GG: and that starts with not giving up on her and acting like a friend  
GG: treating her like shes your friend even through her games will show her that you do want to be her friend and that she doesnt have to keep testing you  
GG: eventually she wont anymore!!  
GG: but dave that probably wont even begin to happen for months so  
GG: dont lose hope ok!!! just focus on yourself and let that happen on its own  
TG: i guess that makes sense  
TG: im just not really sure how to do that you know like  
TG: if i ignore her games shell get bored??  
TG: but in order to befriend her i have to not engage  
GG: oh you can still engage  
GG: just dont start things unless she starts them first you know??  
GG: always be friendly to her until shes snooty  
GG: itll piss her off because at first shell think its like a part of the game  
GG: because shes so insincere all the time she just assumes everyone else is too  
GG: but shell give in eventually!!!  
TG: ok cool that makes total sense and does the exact opposite of make her look crazy  
GG: :P  
TG: but i think I understand  
GG: good!!!  
GG: im kind of curious though...  
GG: what made you decide you wanted to be her friend? i thought you just needed a place to stay   
TG: well  
TG: i did  
TG: but  
TG: you said she needed a friend  
TG: and the whole reason i called for the room was because she seemed cool  
TG: so why wouldnt i want to be???  
GG: :)  
TG: what  
GG: nothing 8)  
TG: no what  
GG: nothing!!  
TG: then why are you smiling  
GG: 8):)8):)  
TG: im never iming you again  
GG: ):  
TG: goddamn it  
TG: sounds like i gotta go anyway rose apparently made dinner while i was unpacking my stuff  
GG: :oo okaaaay  
GG: goodbye dave!!  
GG: good luck!  
TG: later

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 06:22PM --

 

That was probably more information about Rose’s instability than Dave ever needed to understand. From the looks of things, she was royally fucked up. Did she have a shitty homelife growing up or what? Sure, everyone has their flaws and those neat little ways it all tangled together but. When it came to Rose something seemed genuinely _wrong._

And despite barely knowing the girl he found himself worried about it. It was beyond him how anyone could live their life the way she apparently did.

He turned into the kitchen just as Rose was pulling her thumb from her mouth. She was stirring something on the stovetop, seemingly giving it a taste before she reached over to turn off burners.

“Well, it’s not steak,” he said, offering a lopsided smirk as he moved closer. He reached upward to push up his sunglasses, since it was finally dark enough outside that he could even stand it. She seemed surprised to be looking at his eyes for once, momentarily speechless before she looked back at her pots. 

“You said macaroni and cheese,” she told him, lifting the pot up from the stove and carrying it over to where she had laid out two plates. “I was just trying to be accommodating.”

He watched as she set the plates up, curiosity brimming. It was clearly not boxed Kraft stuff she had made. Strings of cheese were stretching as she spooned noodles onto a pile in the middle of the plate. Those strings settled over top the pile she had made and encased it as they hardened. He was pretty dumbfounded as he watched. She moved onto her next pot where she had been steaming diced broccoli and cauliflower, which was next to get piled overtop of the pasta just enough to spill over. After that was apparently pork, which she had already sliced. Piece by piece she arranged them out, encircling her current creation and containing it together. The meat was drizzled with some sort of apple puree, and after dropping a dot on the plate, she popped the spoon in her mouth to lick clean and expertly tossed it into the sink.

She then picked both up and turned around, apparently caught off guard by the fact that he was watching her. She tried to laugh it off, ducking her head and moving around him to arrange the plates at the table. Oddly enough she placed them so they were actually sitting together instead of at opposite ends this time. 

“I’m confused,” he said, reaching back to pull cutlery out of the same drawer from earlier to give her a hand. She took it from him and arranged it, moving back to the fridge to pour glasses of water. “Jade told me your name was Lalonde, not fucking Ramsay. What the fuck gives.”

Rose seemed flustered, but in a good way for once. She put down the water, fixed up her hair, removed her apron, all while keeping her gaze locked to her feet. “It’s not that amazing,” she insisted, pulling out her chair to sit down. “I just like making things look nice sometimes.”

Dave took his own seat with a snort, wasting no time in digging right in because as much as he hated to admit it, it looked fucking delicious and he was _glad_ he wasn’t stuck cooking for himself. “Okay, I’m glad we cleared that up because this place was a fucking disaster when I first stopped by.”

He half expected her to get offended. But oddly enough she just grinned a bit and flashed him a quick glance. “I’m bad at picking up after myself day to day. That doesn’t mean I don’t like certain projects.”

He nodded his head, chewing a few more times before speaking. “Fair enough. But holy shit, if you cook everyday I will be in charge of cleaning. It would be a small price to pay to eat like this instead of goddamn Ichiban noodles everyday.”

She didn’t look up from her plate, but she did smile. 

“That sounds like a lovely arrangement. I’m going to be working night shift Tuesday to Saturday, so if you don’t mind eating at five, I’d be happy to let you know of any specifics involved with the tidying.”

Specifics? That sounded complicated and OCD. Oh well, he should have expected that.

“Eating at five sounds good to me. Where you working night shift at? Grocery store or something?” Sounded like a boring job. He couldn’t actually imagine Rose working somewhere like there. She’d get fired way too fast for her mouth. 

“I mix drinks, actually,” she replied, swallowing her last bite. “It’s a brewhouse slash sports bar. Six to two. I really love the energy there, though. Especially around 11 when things are just starting to shift from jocks to nightlife. Listening to old men drunkenly tell me their life stories while hot shots try and hit on me straight out of their big wig corporate jobs where they think they have such promising futures.”

Dave found himself studying her face as she spoke. She seemed so genuinely _happy_ with it all. She really had a knack for analyzing and studying people, didn’t she? But that could be troublesome. People didn’t always fit into nice columns. He didn’t want to find out how she responded when she found people who broke out of her expectations for them. That could end up messy if she wasn’t careful.

“But, yes. Next week I start working five shifts a week so you likely won’t see much of me after hours. Mondays and Thursdays I’ll be out for the mornings too, since I have class.”

Yeesh, that was ambitious. Sure, he was planning on going to a couple classes too, but five shifts a week at the same time? Talk about wearing yourself out.

“As long as you don’t overwork yourself, I guess,” he replied, nonchalantly digging back into his meal. Fuck it was good. He was going to be living like a goddamn king. “I’m gonna be calling in sick on your behalf if I see you’re getting too tired.”

Rose stalled. Her lips pursed and she put down her fork, hands falling limp next to her plate. He looked up at her quizzically but her head was turned, away from his line of sight.

“Why... Would you even care? You barely know me.”

She still wasn’t looking at him. This was weird. Did he really say something that wrong? Or was this that thing Jade was talking about. She doesn’t think he can be nice to her and genuinely want to be her friend. Right, got it.

“Sure, not now I don’t,” he answered, resting back in his seat and dropping a few more macaroni noodles in his mouth. “But I will soon. And hell we could be friends soon, too. That’d be cool. I mean, if you’re cool with that. I’m not gonna sit here and tie you down to my friendship chair or push you down some friendship stairs or anything." 

She didn’t answer that one. Just cut another slice of her pork in half and moved it in her mouth.

“Have you finished unpacking?”

Well that was sure a subject change.

“As much as I can. I don’t really have enough space for my turntables and mixing equipment but. I guess if I really want it I’ll have to switch it out with my photography stuff. No big deal.”

That seemingly caught her attention while she sipped from her glass of water. When she put it back down he could see the smudge of lipstick around the brim. Did she really put more on just to have dinner?

“What kind of photography stuff?” She asked, leaning forward in her seat. Her arms crossed over on the table, propping herself up.

“I got a portable black room,” he answered, trying to keep the pompous bragging out of his tone; something that was basically impossible. He was proud of his toys. “Red light, enlargers, developing trays; all that stuff. Just cover the window in some tin foil and boom, making photos. Had the same camera since I was like 13. Only ever took selfies back then, though. I’ve sort of grown up from that now.”

He sort of got lost in his own thoughts then, sure that Rose had to be tuning out.

“I don’t know I like. Capturing people. I like being about to take a shot of one aspect of their life. Simplifying them to one moment in time as if that photo could ever say anything about them at all. It’s totally pointless and it’s fascinating. I’d like to make an album of one model some day. If I take enough shots, I might be able to catch enough of those singular moments to really get every aspect of them on film. That just sounds incredible.”

Completely embarrassed Dave lifted his head, quickly stuffing his mouth full with the rest of his meal. Fuck, he needed to not talk about that kind of shit in front of people.

“That’s really admirable.”

He slowly lifted his gaze, swallowing what he could before letting out a muffled “huh.”

Rose was glancing over at the window sill where the herbs were growing. Most of them seemed decently healthy aside from one of the end that only had two leaves left on it.

“You don’t just take photos, you have a reason for doing it and you have a message you want to express and specific purpose behind your work. Not only that, you can put it into words. That’s just really admirable to me.”

Holy shit, he’d done the unthinkable. He actually got sincerity out of Rose Lalonde. Not just sincerity, either. A compliment. An honest to God, non-backhanded compliment. If his face wasn’t flushing so horribly he might actually celebrate. Figures the one thing that breaks his blush-less facade was his art.

“It’s pretty whatever,” he dismissed, getting up from his seat to drop his plate in the sink. After a bit of consideration he took it out, stacking all the dishes to the side and filling the sink with water. He _did_ say he was going to clean.

“So what’s the story with your music, then?” She asked, still at the table.

He answered with a shrug, squirting dish soap into the sink and watching the bubbles swirl around the water stream.

“I just like it. It’s fun to create something people can dance to and that can inspire them.”

“You should set up your turntables out here,” she suggested, getting up from her seat and bringing her plate over to the sink. He looked over to see if she was serious, but her expression seemed genuinely encouraging. “We can tidy up the herbs a bit and you can have the seat to put your things on. There’s plenty of space in front of it for tables. Take chairs, we can take a trip to Ikea if you need. You shouldn’t give up any of your art or be limited to one at a time.”

Dave kept his gaze down as he scrubbed. He really wanted to feel encouraged by what she was saying but it just made him feel so trapped and discouraged and mostly embarrassed. He didn’t want to set up in the living room, he didn’t want anyone to hear him or see him while he did it. Of course... If she was working night shifts...

“Sure, that sounds great. Thanks.”

He offered her a small smile and she flashed him one, too. Then she was moving to the other side of him, picking up the dishes he had stacked up and starting to dry them and put them away. 

“I hope you don’t think I’m pressuring you or anything,” she offered, shutting drawers and opening cupboards. “I just. I know art. It’s a big part of my life and... I guess I’m glad you understand it, too.”

This was beginning to get interesting. He tried to listen without being nosy, glancing up at her every other moment without staring. She was drying the same pan on a continuous loop, seemingly not realizing it was already dry.

“Don’t get me wrong when I say I love Jade to death but she’s a very mathematical mind. She does her best to understand and listen and sympathize but her passion is just elsewhere. It’s not a bad thing she’s just. Well, she grows herbs and messes with electronics. She’ll riff guitar for fun and doodle sometimes but it’s not really the same. Hearing you talk about your photos though that. That was it. That was everything I’ve ever wanted someone to understand.”

She seemed to snap out of a trance after that. Turning away from him to put away her pan and leaving the kitchen entirely. Apparently she wasn’t really paying attention to how much she was giving away. And even if she had put up that wall all of a sudden, Dave still felt like the foundation under it was significantly weaker now.

After the dishes were done he dragged out his last few boxes to set up his turntables by the window like Rose told him to. He folded the newspaper on the seat up properly, lined the herbs up along the very sill of the window, making sure to handle with care the one that was almost dead. He piled up some records, hooked up his tables and his soundboards by stealing some of the chairs from the kitchen. Looks like he would need to get some furniture for these. No biggie. He was mostly just glad he could set them up at all.

At some point when he was setting up, Rose came out of her room in her pajamas. They were completely different than her grubby laundry day sweats- small and skimpy and thin. He looked up at her with a smirk, a bit sweaty from the lifting and cable messes that he had had more than a couple temper tantrums over already.

“Do you play?” He asked her, innocently at first, but the flush that suddenly pooled on her face was telling.

“Violin,” she answered, quietly as she tried to scurry past him. Did she not realize what she was wearing or what?

“You should do a mix with me sometime,” he called after her. 

She stopped just short of the hallway, stalling there for a minute before giving her head a shake.

“I don’t play for people.” There was a pause before she continued walking. “Sorry.”

At first glance that sounded like a plain statement that he was expected to respect and move on from. But the tone oozed of “this is your challenge. Good luck.”


	7. Chapter 7

\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 10:21PM –

TT: I’m not happy with you.  
TT: If my unhappiness with you was measured on a scale between one and ten, it would be minimum 15.  
GG: sigh  
TT: Is that really all you can say for yourself?  
GG: rooooose im sorry if i put you in a weird spot  
TT: That’s a bit of an understatement.  
TT: Welcoming a stranger into my home because he already has a key?  
TT: Don’t you think you should have at least discussed it with me?  
GG: there wasnt any time to discuss it. you put this off for months :|  
TT: That doesn’t mean you could take care of it behind my back.  
GG: rose  
GG: i love you okay and i just wanted to make sure you were going to be okay  
GG: i didn’t want you to have to worry about money or anything while i was away  
GG: besides you know that you liked dave the moment he called!!!  
GG: hes also really cute so you should probably be thanking me!!  
TT: You’re right. Denying me free will was totally justified because you think he’s good looking.  
GG: oh stop being so dramatic  
GG: rose he likes you just fine and if you dont automatically build up a barrier you  might start liking him too  
TT: I don’t intend on opening up.  
GG: ok then dont open up! but can you at least not go out of your way to try and get him to leave? give him a chance  
GG: i talked to him earlier and hes really nice and he wants to get to know you  
GG: and you KNOW thats tough for people to do even when you arent making it worse because youre just a complex person  
GG: if he genuinely wants to be your friend you should at least try  
TT: I don’t think you’re lying but I still have doubts about the sincerity of his statements.  
TT: However, for the sake of simplicity, I’ll go easy on him.  
GG: thank you!!!!  
TT: Not that he won’t need to deal with the basics.  
TT: He did say he was going to be in charge of household cleaning.  
GG: :| rose  
TT: What? I can’t let him completely off the hook.  
GG: uuuuugggghhhhhhhhhhhhh  
GG: at least admit that hes cute ;D  
TT: Even if he was cute I wouldn’t admit it. You should have seen the outfit he was wearing when he waltzed in here.  
GG: haha yeah youre right about that  
GG: but aside from that?  
GG: eh?  
TT: I like his freckles.  
GG: ehhhhhhh??  
TT: I suppose his overall appearance is passable.  
GG: you completely think hes cute  
TT: No I don’t.  
GG: i bet you have a crush on him  
TT: Crushes are for children.  
GG: just keep it out of my bed alright  
TT: I’m going to sleep.  
GG: haha aww dont be like that!!!!  
GG: roooose :(  
GG: <3?  
TT: Sigh.  
TT: <3  
GG: <3!!!!

\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 10:44 PM --

 

Rose wasn’t very happy with how unapologetic Jade seemed, but from the looks of things, it couldn’t be helped. Still, Jade was right in saying that Dave honestly didn’t seem _that_ bad. A little rough around the edges sure, but overall, fine. Rose meant what she said when she promised she’d go easy on him. After all, he didn’t deserve total abuse. But he wasn’t getting a free ride, either. He was still a stranger to her and that wasn’t going to change until extensive testing was done on him. Whoops, _to_ him.

Tomorrow she’d begin those tests. They’d have to be slightly modified since she really didn’t want to get _rid_ of him anymore. Just see what he was like and test his boundaries. But that was going to be easy. It always was.

She started off simple after her morning shower. Simple being, she left her clothes thrown about the floor, panties on the doorknob, bra hanging from the hand towel hook, and her towel sopping wet in the corner. Dave _did_ say he was going to be in charge of cleaning. Rose was already planning on spending the day out writing before she had to work, so she wouldn’t even be home to fight with him over it.

After doing her makeup she left it all open on the counter top. Her eyeshadow palette and contouring kit left out of their boxes, eyebrow pencil out, eyeliner out, lipstick out. She made sure it took up as much space as possible before pulling her hairbrush out of the basket, sorting out her hair and sliding on her headband. Perfect.

She left the apartment with her laptop tucked under her arm. Dave was still sleeping after an early start and move yesterday, so she left him a note that said nothing more than “Good luck with your job hunt.”

She had no idea if he was looking for work or not. But he never mentioned having one already, and no matter what his circumstances were, that note was going to seem bitchy regardless. Point proven and mission accomplished, as far as she was concerned.

Settling down in the coffee shop was nice. It had already been weeks since she had last been, putting her focus on exams and studying properly. But now that those were over she could settle in to her usual seat, quietly sipping on her Chai Tea while she worked on her novel. She even had a new idea for it, after that dream that she had. She never really considered writing a serious romance before, but something about the dynamic that adventurer had with her witch was intriguing.

She could only hope she would be able to do it justice, when it was all said and done.

Trying to introduce him was a struggle. She had far and few male characters by default aside from aging wizards, so getting in the mindset of a young male was difficult. After an hour she was weighed down by discouragement, bitterly finishing her drink and closing the lid of her laptop.

That sure put a damper on her plans. She watched people pass outside the window, idly nibbling on the nail of her pinky finger. What could she do about this character? And almost more importantly, what was she supposed to do for the rest of the day?

Her contemplation turned into a decision, and despite the way it made her teeth grind and grit in frustration, she headed back to the apartment. There was still no sign of Dave being up. She tore off her note and crumpled it up, sending it flying into the trash. She could go back to sleep for awhile and wait for him, but that would be too easy. Instead she turned on the television, finding herself a morning talk show to turn up obnoxiously loud. Yes, Maury would do nicely.

Naturally she wasn’t all that into it, and the first 15 minutes were absolute torture. She was rolling her eyes, laying her face in her palm- this was miserable.

But, it was effective. Dave’s door creaked open and he padded out, his hair a bedheaded mess, bare feet, t-shirt and boxers, with a big fluffy blanket she was unfamiliar with pulled around his shoulders.  Shit, she almost felt bad. He actually resembled a newborn kitten with the way his eyes were shut as he stumbled.

“Good morning,” she offered cheerfully, hitting mute on the television remote. Sweet freedom. Sweet sweet fucking freedom. “Sorry I didn’t bring you any coffee. I wasn’t sure what you drank.”

Dave almost tried to smile, lifting a blanketed fist and rubbing at his eye with it. “Caramel mocha frappes,” he answered, voice rumbly and gravely in sleep. He opened his eyes ever so slightly, a severe squint being the best he could manage. He moved into the kitchen, picking up where he had left his sunglasses the night before and sliding them on his face.

“Wait,” she interrupted, amusement bubbling. “Are you... Hungover? Don’t tell me you broke into my cabinet.”

“Har har,” he answered, still groggy as he waddled over to the couch to sit next to her. “No I’m not hungover. My eyes are just really sensitive to light. Have been since I was a baby. My brother had the same problem so I’m assuming it’s hereditary.”

Now she sort of felt bad for her joke. And all the snide inner monologue comments she made yesterday. She didn’t bother apologizing, though. Wouldn’t be worth it.

“What are you watching?”

His half-asleep voice was actually really cute.

“Maury of course. What else should one watch on a Saturday morning?” Her smile was a little too sincere for her liking. Especially when he seemed to smile back. At first it was just to himself as he faced forward, but eventually he turned his head.

“Superhero cartoons,” was his answer. She had to laugh. Half-asleep Dave was adorable. “So what do you have going on today?”

Rose sat back, organizing her thoughts. What was her plan again? Oh right.

“Well, I already spent my morning writing at the café,” she started, with the intention of continuing. Dave had other plans, though.

“No shit,” he exclaimed, not in a sarcastic way but in a quizzical way. Though his inflection was still rather muted in exhaustion. “Writing in coffee shops is basically all I’ve done for the past two weeks. Looks like we got something in common.”

Rose stalled, a weird weight suddenly dropping through her head. Was that... Excitement?

“You didn’t tell me you wrote,” she answered, desperately wishing she still had tea to hide behind. She didn’t want to look eager or happy about this. It shouldn’t mean anything to her, after all.

“I don’t usually,” he answered, the sleep in his voice starting to wear off. “But I started a screenplay last month based on some characters I made up when I was a kid.”

Okay, Rose had to admit defeat. Jade was right. Dave _was_ really cute. Just. In a boyish way, not in a guy-I-wish-would-notice-me way.

“A movie, huh. Can’t say I’ve ventured there before.” She could always give it a shot, though? Maybe it would go over better than her million and one failed novel attempts.

“You just write books?” He asked, giving his nose a wipe before lifting his blanket off his shoulders. He was so fucking _thin_.

“Yes,” she answered, sort of tempted to take that blanket from him so she could disappear in it. She knew what question was coming next. “I’m boring like that." 

“You’re not boring,” he refuted, giving his shoulders a casual shrug. Oh no, you don’t get to blow off complimenting Rose Lalonde, mister. “The usual doesn’t have to be boring. What are your books about?”

Not the question she was expecting. Fair enough. You win again, Strider. 

“I write about magic,” she answered, somewhat unsure why she was bothering. It’s not like Dave was actually interested... Right? “Witches and wizards and sorcerers, good and evil. And before you say anything, no, it’s not like Harry Potter.”

Dave closed his mouth. He was about to ask it. He was about it ask it just like everyone else had ever. Glad he knew better than to push his luck. At least he didn’t ask if she was published. That was the real taboo. The question everyone always asked first. She hated it. Only query agents were allowed to remind her that she wasn't good enough. They were the only people she could take it from gracefully. Probably because they had the education required to make that call.

“Sounds cool,” he tried instead, yawning and resting his head on the back of the couch. Poor guy probably could have used more sleep. Sucks to be him. “You should let me read one sometime.”

That was an instant response from Rose, a breathy laugh as she got up to her feet with a chant of “No, no, no, no.” She shook her head, crossed her arms, and faced away from him. “That’s not happening. If my books aren’t good enough to be published, they aren’t good enough for you. Or for anyone else.”

“That’s not true,” he answered, lazily, as if he didn’t honestly care about cheering her up. But of course he didn’t. “I mean, I’m sure you’ve heard it all before and I can’t change what you’ve decided to believe but. That’s really not true.”

“You’re right,” she snapped, her tone more than the usual amount of snooty. “I have heard it before, and you aren’t going to change my mind. I’m allowed to try and reach my own standards that I have for myself.”

“You are allowed to do that yeah, all I’m saying is you’d probably be a lot less bitter if you didn’t make your standards for yourself unrealistically high.”

Now she was raising her voice, frustration bubbling up. Who the hell did he think he was? He wasn’t a writer, he wasn’t a publisher, he wasn’t an query agent, he had no right to tell her where her standards should be.

“Getting published isn’t unrealistic. Thousands upon thousands of authors have been published. It’s a plenty realistic goal. What would you even know? What, you write a movie script on a whim and suddenly you’re an expert in the entire business?”

Dave stood up with a loud exhale, keeping his head down. It didn’t really look like he was used to getting involved in this sort of conflict. Well, good. He could fucking cry about it, the prick.

“I don’t want to fight with you, Rose,” he said, keeping up a stern tone. “I just don’t want to see you beating yourself up because some rich guy in New York says you should be.”

Fuck, this entire argument was infuriating. Rose knew well that she was pink in the face, and she took a moment to take a deep breath before even considering a response.

“Rich men in New York hold my life goals in their hands. I don’t see the harm in listening to their advice.”

Dave just held up his hands, muttering out a quiet “okay” before dropping them back down to his sides. He turned around to snatch up his blanket, dragging it through to the hallway. Rose could hear his backhanded “sorry I said anything” and puffed out a less than impressed exhale.

She could have dug deep with that. Told him that maybe the reason he’s been such a failure this far in his life is because he never pushed himself to succeed and accepted a gold star from anyone willing to hand it over as success. That’s the reason he wasn’t good enough to start his photo album, the reason no one listened to his music, the reason he would never see his name in the credits of any film.

But that would have been way too far. That would have been something he could have moved out over. And that’s really not what she wanted. They had different opinions on something. That was it. And that’s where she would leave it.

She left him alone for the morning, well aware that he was probably brooding the same amount she was. Somehow not hearing anything from him was making her anxious. She heard the shower running but even after he left he didn’t say anything. He didn’t comment on the mess she had left, and when she glanced in, she found he had actually tidied it up. There was a hamper she didn’t recognize stowed away in the corner, and peering in she found all her laundry piled at the bottom underneath his shirt and boxers from this morning. This must have been his. Was he really going to give it up just because of her?

He had cleaned off the countertop, too, putting her hair brush back in the basket and stacking up her makeup in the corner. Nothing was in its box- she could only assume he didn’t actually know how that worked- but it was all neatly arranged and out of the way. A new toothbrush had joined the holder to the left, and underneath her blow dryer was an electric razor he must have plugged in.

With a sigh she walked out of the room, admitting defeat and moving down the hall to knock on his door. It took a minute while he got up, and he opened the door with his waist wrapped in a towel and his sunglasses already on under sopping wet hair.

“Hey,” was the first thing he managed to say, apparently not at all swayed by having a chest covered in water droplets from where his hair was dripping down on it. Rose had to remind herself to keep her eyes on his, though she did take a second to close them while she pinched the bridge of her nose in draining pride.

“If you don’t have anything planned already for today,” she started, shoulders heaving in defeat. “We could do that Ikea trip today. Grab anything else you might need. ...Such as a new laundry hamper.”

She had to avoid eye contact, there. Damn, she so hated acknowledging her games directly. It was passive aggression for a reason. 

“Yeah, okay,” was his answer, glancing back in his room. She tried to peek inside, slightly curious. The state of someone’s room said a lot about their personality, after all. And getting to know the real Dave would involve a trip in there eventually. “I’ll get ready to go.”

“I’ll make lunch," she offered, taking a step back. “Anything you’re craving?”

Dave seemed to honestly consider it, before turning his head directly to face her with a blank expression and a flat mouth.

“Tuna.”

“Tuna?”

“Tuna.”

“Okay, tuna.”

That was easily enough. She had a couple cans stock piled. Mix it up with some mayonnaise and celery and dump it on the last two hamburger buns with some cheese and that was done.

She diligently worked to get the meal done by the time he was dried and dressed. He eventually came out into the kitchen in a much better outfit than Coke Shirt, complete with actual jeans instead of awkward shorts. Thank God. His hair was still a little wet, but she couldn’t imagine a guy like Dave getting too anal over something like that.

“How’s it coming?” He asked, taking a seat at the table. His phone was out in his hands and he was flipping it around idly, letting out a yawn.

“I was just about to take them out of the oven.”

He seemed surprised, leaning back in his seat to try and look. “Wait, the oven?”

“Yes,” she answered, amusement brimming. The oven door opened further from where she had left it slightly ajar, broiling her tuna melts on the top shelf. The cheese was completely melted, dripping down onto the baking sheet. The uncovered edges where the tuna was visible was browned, the bun was crispy, and she called that done. “Haven’t you had a tuna melt before? I’m fairly certain they have them at Johnny Rockets.”

“I’ll rocket your Johnny,” was his reply, sitting up straight when she dropped his two pieces in front of him. Rose smirked as she set down her own plate, sliding into the seat adjacent from him with a can of soda in either hand. He took his while she opened hers, and after a sip each, they went straight to eating. 

“I’m pretty sure he’s about as straight as they come,” she answered, blowing gently at her cheese before daring to take a bite. “But you’re welcome to try.”

“Trying is for quitters,” Dave insisted, diving right in and animatedly chewing with a wide open mouth as he fanned his face. It was obviously too hot, but he just swallowed it down like that. “I’ll fucking succeed.”

“You’ll succeed in fucking.”

“Damn straight.”

“I thought you were ‘definitely only into women please don’t peg me’? What happened to that?”

“That’s still a thing,” he insisted, though it came with an unconvincing shrug. He was clearly still apprehensive. Not that she wasn’t used to that. Most men she knew were raised to be defensive about their sexuality. “But if it meant showing you up I would probably screw a dude.” 

She couldn’t help but smile hearing that. She even laughed a bit, dropping her head into her hands. “I see I’ve already corrupted you into being more like me. Excellent.”

“I’m sure we’ll start seeing me influencing you, too, if we wait long enough.”

Somehow his statement felt different. He had a serious tone to match his blank expression, swallowing his last bite of tuna melt.

“You’ll end up playing your violin for me and letting me read one of your books and I’ll let you look at my photos and spin something for you.”

Rose was quiet for a few moments, eventually standing with a polite smile and taking both of their plates. She actually managed to get them into the dishwasher instead of just dropping them in the sink like usual. She ignored his comments, though, instead putting her hands on her hips. 

“If you’re ready to leave, we should get going. I hope you know that you’re driving.”

Dave paused as a small smirk happened across his face. He stood, slinging his arms into his hoodie sleeves like only guys could ever seem to do. “Yeah, I know. Not about to carry a table back on a fucking bus. Wouldn’t even be worth buying it’d just get smashed up and... Peed on.”

Rose practically snorted behind her hand, giving him an “are you serious” stare before more laughter bubbled up. Not only was that his sense of humor, it was hers. Pathetic. He was seemingly amused at her laughing, though, breaking out into a grin.

“I’m fucking serious homeless people are like dogs where I’m from they will just piss wherever they want and you can’t even blame them? Like holy shit the guy doesn’t even have a toilet cause the system screwed him so bad why the hell would you make his life any worse by getting mad at him for taking a piss? He’s living off the little joys.”

“Would you just get your shoes on and get outside already. That is the most preposterous thing I’ve ever heard.”

Dave was obviously not buying it, though, just grinning wider as he made his way to the door. “Maybe that’s why so many of them have dogs. Seeing that dog piss on everything probably makes them feel less self conscious.”

_“Dave."_

“Alright alright, I’m coming. You can’t deny I have a point though.”

“No, I certainly can’t.”


	8. Chapter 8

Admittedly, Dave hadn’t actually been to an Ikea before. Since this was the first place away from home he had lived in, he never needed to furniture shop. Hell, even his brother just made tables out of scrap wood and cinderblocks. Furniture was far and few between where Dave was from. Which made the idea of a furniture store as vast and insane as this one hard to believe.

Rose was very straightforward about her trip; she picked a cart, grabbed a bag to “separate” their stuff from one another, and started on her way. She was picking up little things: baskets and book ends and lightbulbs and organizational drawer inserts. Dave was following behind awestruck, eventually finding himself a new hamper to put in their cart. And it was collapsible? Awesome.

“So did you just furnish your entire apartment here? I mean jesus, have you seen this place? How many different ways can you even set up a bedroom? Apparently 46. I did not know that.”

Rose seemed amused with him. Which he had to be thankful for, considering that they had already fought once today. He really didn’t mean to provoke her with his comment. But, Rose ‘temperamental’ Lalonde had to be accommodated, even if she wasn’t understood.

“Actually, the only thing we got from here was our table and chairs and the television stand. The desks and bookshelves were all included when we first rented the place.”

Dave nodded attentively, rifling through do-hickeys and whats-a-whos-its until his half of the cart was as full as Rose’s. So much of this stuff was useful. Really useful, in fact. Ostentatious and ridiculous, but useful. These could go in his drawers and this could hang off the windowsill and this would fit in the closet. It was perfect.

They managed to happen upon offices and desks before the cart was overflowing, and Dave started to peek around at his options. He definitely needed something slightly elevated. Average desk height was too low to spin on. Surface area of course had to be at least the size of the tables, but he wasn’t about to argue with something that could also hold a few pop cans at the same time.

Rose eventually disappeared around a corner while Dave kept looking, determined to find the perfect one. It would be even better if it had some sort of overhead but not-too-high shelving he could put his soundboards on. All things considered, he was still left with too many options, as opposed to too few.

He managed to pick one out eventually, hovering around it and standing in front of it, trying to imagine all of his stuff set up here. The desk even had storage below that he could use for his records which was a pretty nice bonus.

He could spin on this. Fingers pressed to the vinyl, drawing it back, forcing it forward. Expertly flipping through buttons. Record, sample, loop play. He could hear it: familiar beats, basic tunes, accompanied by a custom violin sample and overlaid with a sicknasty melody by none other than Rose Lalonde herself. He wondered how she sounded, what style she played in, but mostly he imagined her expression. Closed eyes, off in her own world while she spoke only with her bow, drawing it back with a tilt of her head, looking up only to make sure she still had an audience, but barely, just under her lashes, sultry and subtle as her arm drew back again and her fingers danced over the strings. 

“Is that the one you picked out? You look sort of odd hanging over it like that.”

Dave’s shoulders rolled back as he stood up straight. What the hell was he just daydreaming about. He cleared his throat, hiding his hands safely away in his pockets.

“Yeah, this will work fine. It’s not too big do you think?" 

Rose gave a thoughtful tilt to her head but otherwise just smiled.

“No, it should fit fine. Do you know what color you’re looking at for it?”

Oh fuck, he had to choose a color? Sure enough he grabbed the label and there were color swatches attached to it. Black-brown, light brown, and white stain. Haha, white stain. 

“I dunno,” he started, trying to keep his immature grin off his face. “What would match the table?” He held the swatches out for her and she circumnavigated her cart to take it from him. A finger curled in her hair as she looked them all over, idly toying with the strands. Dave watched that movement until she started talking again.

“I’d suggest the darker color. It’s neutral and not too light to be tacky.”

Dave had no idea how any of those things were related, but he was all for it if she liked it.

“Ok, cool. So what now. Do I call down some poor sucker who has to go trolley one of these out of the back for me?”

He was taken aback when Rose seemed to smirk, pointing toward a stand off near the aisle. Upon further inspection Dave discovered he was supposed to write down the item number. Okay then. After doing that he put the slip of paper in his pocket and returned the pencil to the box he got it from. Rose was already on her way out of the area, and he jogged a bit to catch up with her.

“So what, I bring this to the till like at grocery stores? Then some poor sucker comes and gets it down for me.”

“This is so amusing.”

Dave wasn’t even sure what to expect after hearing that. What the fuck was this place and why was it apparently so complicated?

Entering the warehouse, it all started to fall into place. Fuck, he had to load this thing onto a cart himself? “Goddamn it, why didn’t you warn me it was fucking self carry out? This sucks.”

“Don’t be so melodramatic,” Rose answered, still gripping onto her cart like a housewife.  That sure was hypocritical coming from her. “Just read your paper and we’ll find the right shelf." 

He did as he was told, mumbling and grumbling the entire time about what bullshit this was. Navigating the aisles was easy enough, and soon they had found the right one. Halfway down was the stack of boxes he was looking for. Dave was a bit dumbfounded though- how tiny was this box? How the hell did they squeeze all of that in there?

“What the fuck is this, some sort of ventriloquist desk? There is something way off on the space to size ratio here. That box is going to be dense as fuck.”

Rose stepped up to the plate first, finally backing away from her cart and moving to take one end of the box. “The word you’re looking for is contortionist, not ventriloquist. Ventriloquism involves the illusion of inanimate objects, namely puppets, being given the power of speech.”

Dave was whimpering when he took the other end. “Trust me, I know all about fucking ventriloquism. My brother does it for a living. Well. One of his livings, anyway.”

He was correct in assuming the box was going to be dense, but together it was easy enough to get it loaded onto the bottom rack of the cart. 

“You’re pushing that now,” Rose breathed, pushing up her bangs with a hand on her forehead. Oh ho, miss princess didn’t much like heavy lifting, did she? “Ventriloquism doesn’t sound like a very noble profession. But it is an artform so I have to respect it. Where does he perform?” 

Dave grabbed onto the cart’s handle and started pushing, letting out exaggerated huffs as he did. “Mostly at children’s parties. He spins at clubs and does shit online too though so between it all he makes a lot.”

“I’m assuming the puppet isn’t the focus at the clubs or the internet?”

Dave had to stall on that one. Did he _really_ know Rose well enough for her to know that his brother owned a branch of an enterprise solely built on puppet pornography?

“No,” he answered, decidedly more willing to lie to her than to share that tidbit of his past. At least not this early. “Cal’s just the man at home. No out of sorts escapades for him.”

Rose almost looked skeptical when he first looked over at her. But she just smiled, turning away and finding a lineup to wait in. Sure wasn’t hard- there had to be like 40 of them. It was a long wait though. Especially considering how long their own order took to get through, with all the useless junk Rose had picked up.

Dave’s trunk was slowly filled up, and soon enough they were back on their way home. It was quiet for the most part aside from the radio playing. Dave was drumming on the steering wheel boredly. Rose seemed quite happy on her phone for the most part. She did put it away after awhile though.

“You know, I’m not sure why you would feel the need to lie to me,” Rose said suddenly, glancing out the passenger window with her hands folded neatly in her lap. “I know being embarrassed of one’s family is common and I know the feeling all too well myself, but. It’s a silly thing to be ashamed of, I suppose.”

Dave had to smirk. What was she even talking about? He kept his hands on his steering wheel even as he shot her a glance. “What are you talking about? I didn’t lie to you about anything. Especially not about my family. Have we even talked about my family?”

Rose turned to look at him, sitting up straighter. “Yes, we have. We discussed your brother not 20 minutes ago. You said his work with puppets didn’t spill over into his online work. That was a lie.”

Oh Jesus Lord in Heaven what had he gotten himself into now. Did she fucking _know_ about those websites? More importantly, _how_ did she know about those websites?

“That wasn’t a lie. What makes you think it was a lie?” Rose wasn’t budging.

“Dave, if you honestly think I wouldn’t Google the family name of someone I intend on living with, you’re sorely mistaken.”

Goddamn it. Dave let out a sigh, thankful that they had least pulled up at a red light so he could look her in the eye. He just felt sort of guilty now. He shouldn’t have lied and he knew it.

“Alright, alright, you caught me. I lied about my brother’s sites. His entire business is puppet porn. I was surrounded by it my entire life and I’ve been trying to block it out now that I’m finally free. Is that what you want to hear?”

Rose turned forward and closed her eyes in that snooty way she did, adjusting her arms so they were folded across her chest. “An apology would have been nice.” 

Was she seriously--? Was she honest to God bothering him for an apology after all the bullshit she’s caused since he first called? He hadn’t heard anything close to an apology from her ever, yet she expected one over this- one little lie that came with an entire fucking backstory and subplot of reasoning?

“I’m sorry,” he breathed, swallowing down his bitter disdain and desire to lash out about what a hypocrite she was. Be nice, be kind, be friendly, and she’ll be genuine. She’ll learn to trust you.

Once he said it though she was smiling, turning to look at him so fast her hair had lifted from her face. Her smile was wide and her eyes were bright and holy shit she actually seemed happy and thankful for one basically-sarcastic sorry?

“Thank you,” she responded, her tone just bordering appreciative. He was a bit dumbfounded that it wasn’t some sarcastic brush off he was getting. Maybe he was getting through to her after all?

The smile stuck with her and it was almost infectious. He pulled into his designated parking spot five minutes after and she was still shining with that same expression. As she wandered to the back of the car it seemed to just intensify.

“I really don’t know why you would feel that ashamed in the first place,” she yelled over to him, waiting as he made his way to the trunk to help her out. “I rather enjoyed looking at those sites. I was disappointed when they were his and not yours.”

“Oh yeah,” Dave grunted, starting to stack his arms with bags and reaching up to close the trunk. They’d have to come back down for the desk. “Nothing makes me love my brother’s fetishes quite like growing up around them and being tormented with them my entire life. You don’t even want to know how many fucking mornings I woke up in a pile of those shitty dolls. Who _knows_ where the fuck those noses have been? They’re certainly all over my face now, aren’t they.”

Rose was amused to say the least. She chuckled to herself as they stood in the elevator, though she didn’t start asking again until they were safely in the apartment and away from any sort of eavesdroppers.

“So it was his fetish too, not just something he did for money? That’s nice. It’s great to make money off of something you’re passionate about.”

Dave blew up his bangs as he dropped his bags, looking over his shoulder to shoot her a glare.

“Remind me to never introduce you two ever. I don’t think I could handle that much mockery in one go.”

He was just joking. She seemed to understand that, based on the little titter that came out of her. Good. Better than accidentally relighting the passive aggressive fuel that was apparently her entire life.

“I don’t mean to mock you,” she said, in a fake offended tone that was clearly the exact mockery he had been referring to. “I suppose I would just have to walk in your shoes to understand what could possibly be so bad about some phallic puppets. I imagine they would just be like inanimate pets.”

“That is just about the most wrong thing I ever heard get said,” he sighed, giving a shake to his head. Rose answered with a challenging smirk, moving back toward the front door. “Come on, Pinocchio, let’s go get your desk." 

Oh no, oh fuck no that was not happening. She had started out the door, and he rushed out behind her.

“I swear to God if you ever call me that again I’m going to hide every tube of lipstick you own. Do you understand that when I was born that’s really what he wanted to name me? This isn’t a joke, you’re giving me flashbacks. I’m triggered. Respect my boundaries, man.” 

Rose was practically snorting as she covered her face, only lowering her hand for a dark smirk and a quiet, “Don’t tell me you’re going to take my lipstick so you can look more like Cal.”

“AaaaauauuuuughhhhhHHH _HHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_ ”

The afternoon was quiet after they brought the desk upstairs. Rose went right to making dinner- honey glazed ham and scalloped potatoes, fuck yeah- while Dave went right to work in trying to build the stupid thing. It was actual literal bullshit to put together, in all honesty. By the time Rose’s meal was finished Dave hadn’t even gotten to the point where it was fucking standing yet.

“Why the hell did you bring me to that place,” he lamented, head rested hopelessly on the table while he shoveled potato into his mouth. “Everything is awful and it’s all because of Ikea. I’ve never felt more emasculated in my entire life. Shoving a dildo up my ass would be less emasculating than building this fucking desk is.”

“If you feel that way I can certainly arrange it.”

He had to shoot her a glare, but she had her eyes closed as she sipped espresso from her demitasse. He wanted to make fun of her tiny cup, but it wasn’t worth it. Screws and pieces _A_ through _ZZZZZZZZZZZ_ were taking away all his energy.

“So you work tonight then,” he said instead, this time nudging a cube of ham to the back of his mouth.

“Yes,” she answered, exhaling through it while she brought her cup down and returned it to the saucer. “I’ll be back around three. I’ll do my best not to wake you.” 

“I don’t care,” he whined, head flopping to rest on the other cheek. “I’ll be building this stupid desk until then anyway so I’ll be awake.” 

She chuckled as she stood up from the table. She put her plate in the dishwasher and disappeared into her room.

He felt a bit lonely after she had left. Just him and the ticking of a clock, a half finished plate of food and a four percent finished desk. Great.

He finished his meal first and foremost, putting his plate away and washing up the rest of the pans she had used. By the time he sat down next to his desk again, Rose had come out of her room. She had changed her outfit for work, clearly. Black skinny jeans, barely covering a black pair of shoes. Black t-shirt, black necktie, dark make up, and the same sporty ponytail from the day he’d moved in. Yeah, that seemed about right for working behind a bar.

Dave watched her curiously as she fumbled with her clutch, pulling out her bus pass and slipping it between her lips. Man that thing had probably seen more lipstick than his face had.

“Do you want a ride or something?” He offered, spinning his screwdriver in his hand. She seemed almost startled to hear him, as if she’d actually fucking forgotten that he lived there. 

“Oh, no, that’s alright,” she answered, flashing him a smile. “It’s not a very far bus ride.” She was a bit more hurried when she stumbled for the door, pausing just before closing it and throwing back a quick, “See you tomorrow.”

“Yeah,” was his initial response, but looking back at all the work he still had to do, he had his doubts that he could get this done before she was off shift. Fucking Swedish bastards.

Despite all odds, he did manage to finish the desk. Not only that, it had only taken four hours and he was already setting up his equipment. It was always nice to set up his tables for the first time. The wires were always clean and organized, and breaking into the bag of color-coded twist ties he had bought, he started to clear them up off the floor and get them organized in a way that they would _hopefully_ stay.

The desk‘s platforms were perfect for his soundboards, and stack by stack he slowly moved his records out to put below. He minded the plants on the windowsill when he slumped down to the seat, widely yawning. Mixing something right now sounded nice in theory, but fuck was he exhausted.

He hit one of the buttons on his soundboard to start up his secret song, starting his clean up by stuffing all the plastic into the cardboard box it had all come out of. He dropped leftover screws into the bottom of one of the drawers, knowing full well that there was a one percent chance he would ever actually need them for anything.

“ _I don’t wanna close my eyes,_ ” he sang, giving a dramatic spin on his heel as he backed his way toward the front door. “ _I don’t wanna fall asleep ‘cause I’ll miss you babe._ ” 

Stacking the box up against the wall he moved back to his desk, tidying up his tools and putting them safely away in their case. They joined the screws in the drawers, and he slammed it shut. 

“ _And I don’t wanna miss a thing._ ”

Now that his set up was finished he could feel his old passion hitting him hard, though just the thought of spinning put him off. Instead, he opted to get his camera off of his bookshelf. He had about half of a roll left in it, the other half having been used on documenting his drive up from Texas.

Surveying the living room he couldn’t really find much worth taking photos of. He snapped a few of Jade’s plants, leaving out the practically dead one. He dragged a chair over to get an eagle eye view of his turntables. A shot of his mess of wires, and a selfie for old times sake. He’d gone through as much as he could of this room, setting his camera down on the coffee table and laying back on the couch.

The song from earlier resonated enough with him that he ended up putting on _Blades of Glory_. He barely got 20 minutes in before he fell asleep on the couch, sunglasses tilted up into his hair and one arm hanging toward the floor. He was dreaming about money- so, so much money that he had gotten cheating the stock market. Shimmering briefcases and piles of bills and coins and gold.

“Dave,” he heard suddenly, taken aback as some girl with black hair chopped off at the shoulders landed in front of him, wearing a huge grin and bright red sunglasses that reflected his image back to him. Was that blood down his throat? “Dave, wake up. You really don’t want to sleep here.”

He jolted awake with a start, a hand shooting up to his neck to grab at it. He pulled it away fast, relief washing over him when it came back clean. He wasn’t dead. What a stupid thing to be dreaming about. More like what a stupid thing to actually be scared about. Now that he realized where he was, he felt like a fucking idiot.

A hand moved to his eyes to give them a rub, and he sat up. Rose was positioned slightly behind him, her hand hovering over his shoulder where she had no doubt jerked it back with how fast he woke up.

“I’m awake,” he lied, gesturing toward the TV. “Just watching a movie.”

Rose scoffed a bit, resting her hand on the top if his head and giving it a condescending stroke.

“Dave that’s a Netflix end of film screen. I could only assume that movie ended hours ago." 

“Oh yeah.”

He sat still for a few moments while he tried to wake up, eyes groggily opening and closing.

“I see you managed to get your desk built. Looks very fancy and expensive with all that equipment on there.”

Dave smirked a bit to himself, bringing up his knees to rest his arms on as he put his head back down. Fuck, he was tired.

“You should play with me sometime,” he said, lifting his head to look up at her. She offered a smile, patting his shoulder before stepping back.

“Alright, I will. I promise. But not tonight. Get some rest in your bed. And please don’t wake me early tomorrow.”

He responded with a silent nod as she walked away. She paused in the front hall to arrange some of her things. He carefully eyed her as he reached for his camera, winding to the next exposure and snapping a photo of her with her back turned.

“Hey, Rose,” he called, eye pressed to the viewfinder. As soon she turned around he took another shot, and when he brought the camera down, he caught sight of the speckle of red in her cheeks.

“Right, well,” she muttered indignantly, walking past him and disappearing into her room. He reached for the remote to turn the television off, a little smirk tugging at his lips. Now he could develop this roll of film. And maybe, if the shots turned out, he would have a subject for that photo album of his.

He finally stood to go to bed, checking the lock on the front door on his way by and moving into his room. He found it hard to believe that Rose genuinely got home at three AM, but there it was, right on the clock. He climbed into bed and dropped his head, finding himself asleep almost instantly.


	9. Chapter 9

By the time the break from school was coming to a close, Rose had found herself in a familiar and constant rhythm. Not just around the house, but with Dave being around, too. As it turned out, he had no idea how university worked, and had far beyond missed the deadline for signing up for classes. She wasn’t even sure he _could_ do a summer semester as a first year. So instead, he had found a barista job by the first week of her classes, and even though he started at 6AM and was done shifts by 10, he took advantage of his lack of classes and stayed late writing his screenplay. Rose had considered joining him after she woke up- she really, honestly did and the desire to do it ate at her every day, but she never went. There was still something in the back of her mind warning her to be cautious and trying to remind her that putting too much of herself out there like that was dangerous. It was always dangerous.

He would come home eventually, and they’d put on a stupid movie while Rose made dinner, (while he buzzed around her with that camera of his, for some reason) and he would work on his turntables all night after she had left for work. Sundays and Wednesdays were the nights Rose didn’t work, and those were the nights where things were the most nerve- wracking for her. Dave never touched his music when she was home. When he wasn’t taking an inordinate amount of candid photos of her, he’d lock himself in his room with a crude scribbled out sign that said “Darkroom in Use” stuck on the door. Or he’d sit next to her on the couch with a sketchbook while she knitted something or worked on her novel. Those nights were quiet, and Rose felt anxious and pressured to keep composed and look smart. He always seemed so relaxed- she envied him.

It was the last Friday before classes began plus her first Friday off, and Rose had a solid plan to use those hours to catch up with her reading and do her laundry. She woke up at 10 as per her usual, enjoying first a scalding hot shower. She had to sigh as she stared at her soaking wet reflection. She really missed Jade, most of all. She missed when they would brush their teeth together and when Jade would offer to blow dry her hair for her. She missed laying in a pile with her for hours at night and feeling her lips and tongue and hearing those heavenly sounds she made.

But today she blow dried her own hair. She watched her own eyes while brushing her teeth. She pleasured herself the old fashioned way, without any company or the warmth of someone else. She could start bringing people home again, now that Jade was gone. But that was always so much work. She did it before to get Jade’s attention- to let her know she was alright with that casual type of thing. And it worked just fine. She didn’t really have that option now. She didn’t trust Dave nearly enough. There was no real goal aside from meaningless sex- and when there’s no hidden agenda, was it really worth doing?

Once she was dressed, Rose made her way to the bottom floor and into the Laundromat. She sorted out her colors from her whites and started two separate loads, leaving the basket in the corner and heading back upstairs. She only stayed long enough to pick up her book, carrying it back down with her. She hopped up onto the counter next to the sink, shimmied against the wall, stretched out her legs and let out a comfortable exhale. Yes, this was the best way to spend an afternoon. The whir of a washing machine, the smell of fabric softener, and a nice enclosed space that wasn’t too hot or too cold, too bright or too dark.

When she opened her book the marker slipped to her lap, and she let it remain there, like she always did. She surrendered herself to the familiar fantasy, eyes glazing over as she slipped into that world.

 

When she came back upstairs with a clean basket of clothes, Dave was home and sprawled out on the couch with an ice cream bar in his mouth. He looked up when the door opened. Something about the way his expression hardened made him look panicked, and he was quick to throw himself up into a sitting position and spin around to get his feet on the floor.

“Ah--” he started, quickly realizing his mouth was still full before pulling out the ice cream along with a loud slurp of where it was melting. “You’re back.”

She had to raise an eyebrow. Everything he was doing was suspect. He could tell she was suspicious too, with the way his face flushed and that boyish grin he played up.

“What did you break?” She asked, instinctively glancing around at the apartment behind him. Everything seemed fine. Maybe he was just being an idiot. She started to drag her laundry basket to her bedroom as he got up from his seat, holding out his popsicle and using it to gesture.

“I didn’t break anything! I just wasn’t sure where you were. I got home from the shop and poof, no Lalonde in sight. Thought I might have to file a missing person’s report. Put up some posters you know. Paste your face on milk cartons. Did they ever actually do that or was that just like, a movie trope?” 

She pushed the door to her bedroom open and started inside, putting her hamper back where it belonged and opening the lid. Her book went back into her bag first, then she started pulling out the clothes. Dave was slowly wandering in behind her, taking a bite out of his ice cream. 

“I assure you, if ever I truly go missing, you won’t see me for twelve hours at least.”

“Well technically I haven’t seen you since like five thirty last night so. It’s already been twelve.” He took a long look around, taking another bite. “You’re kind of a slob.” 

She was taken slightly aback at his statement, standing up straighter and taking a look around. It’s true that her room was a bit of a mess. She never bothered to put away knitting projects when they were finished, and notebooks full of tidbits regarding her novels were thrown on the floor next to her desk as she finished with them. Still, she never expected someone to be so blatant about it. 

“So what?” she responded, snooting at him like she usually did. “I believe chaos is just a sign of a developed mind, honestly. If I can focus in this, I’m clearly intelligent. Besides, I’m more than positive if we walk into your room right now, it would be plenty messy just like mine is. You can’t deny that for even a second, Dave Stri--”

“Let’s go out tonight.”

Rose’s smile faded and her movements paused, slowly turning her head up to look at him. She was surprised when she found herself faced with the lens of his camera, hearing the now-familiar click as he took a shot with one hand.

His face was flushing again, his usual flat mouth wavering ever so slightly at the corners. He almost seemed nervous, with the way his adam’s apple bobbed with a gulp.

“What?”

“For dinner. You and me. And I mean, maybe a movie too, if you want. Just, out you know.”

Now Rose was flushing too, shooting her gaze back to her laundry as she stacked it up. Realizing she was finished with that step she bustled to remember where her closet was, head swimming in anxiety. Was he serious right now? Was this honest to God what she thought it was?

“What’s the occasion?” She finally asked, turning back to him while she busied herself with laundry stocking. Her face was absolutely on fire, and the whole time he spoke her eyes were off to the side, listening carefully for any sort of flub up in his tone or his words that might give away whatever the hell he was planning. 

“No occasion,” was his first answer, before he stalled and reconsidered. “I mean, sort of an occasion? I just mean. Classes start soon and I feel like we’ve made a lot of progress and stuff in the past couple weeks with our whole. Getting along stuff and everything so. We could celebrate that? A toast to friendship?”

There it was. That was the answer. She managed to relax hearing that, shoulders slumping before she had a chance to realize they were hiked up with nerves. A toast to friendship sounded fair. Very fair, actually.

“Alright,” she finally answered, turning around to face him head on. He seemed relieved, his mouth hanging open where it was quivering before. “That sounds nice. Does leaving at six sound alright?”

Dave grinned a little bit, giving his head a nod before he spun around on his heel, waltzing out with his lips pressed back into his ice cream. Another loud slurp followed.

“It’s a date!”

But it wasn’t really, right?

  

Dave was in his room for the rest of the day. His darkroom sign wasn’t up, so she knocked to let him know that lunch was ready. When he opened his door she could just see the state of his desk, covered in scattered photos, with all his photo equipment spread out to cover the entire surface. Good thing he wasn’t in school- he would have nowhere to study.

He came out to eat, binging on Rose’s veggie platter while she brought over her freshly boiled hot dogs.

“And here I thought you’d only be making healthy food. That’s a taste of home if I ever saw one.”

Rose set the plate in front of him along with condiments, quickly moving back for her own plate and a small bowl of chips to go with it. It was like most of their lunches were. Dave talked and talked about the food and about home. As the days went by Rose had grown more accustomed to hearing his tangents, actually memorizing things about his past. It was nice to hear those bits of his life. Sometimes it made her wish she could open up to him like he always did. But from the sounds of things, his life before now was much easier than hers was.

“So where do you want to go tonight?” He finally asked, sliding a carrot into his mouth with a loud crunch, ranch dressing glazing his lips as he did. “I don’t really know this city yet. Or what you really like to eat. I’d peg you as an Italian girl but I can’t be sure.”

That was a bit surprising- he actually got it right. The question was, was she actually going to give him the satisfaction of a job well done? Yeah, she’d pulled enough crap on him. Besides, this was a more serious topic.

“You’d be right,” she told him, enjoying a last chip and resting forward with her elbows on the table. “I was raised on Italian food. I like it a lot.”

Much to her surprise he didn’t congratulate himself or rub it in her face. He gave an impressed pout, nodded his head, then sat back from the table and got to his feet. He didn’t leave without snatching another piece of broccoli though, once again giving it a generous dip in the dressing.

“Alright, I’ll find an Italian place.”

He moved toward his room then, and with a bit of shock on her face, Rose watched his back.

“You’re just going to find a place? No consulting me or anything?” 

“Or anything,” he echoed, turning around and starting to walk backwards. “Can you trust me for one night? I’m not gonna get you killed by food poisoning. You can completely trust me.”

Rose was hesitant. She really hated that word, much less living it. Trust. Rose Lalonde didn’t trust. Not anymore. People weren’t trustworthy. That was a fact she had long since accepted.

She tried to think up a response. Something witty and backhanded that would put him in his place. But his door was shut before she had the chance, and instead she was left alone, wallowing with her own pathetic nerves. Maybe agreeing to this dinner wasn’t the greatest idea.

 

As 6PM closed in, Rose was saying that to herself more and more. She had done her makeup- three times in fact- she remembered deodorant, she put on a nice dress, she dug out a pair of actual shoes, she put something somewhat decorative in her hair as opposed to an ordinary headband. She looked nice. And no matter how many times she managed to psych herself into believing things were going to be disastrous, she knew they were going to be just fine. No, she couldn’t know that, because she couldn’t trust Dave. The thoughts jumped back and forth and jumbled her up. She slid into her desk chair, breath jagged in panic. There had to be a way to calm down.

Opening her pesterchum she scrolled to a familiar contact, opening up a chat window with him and typing out nothing but the words, “How does one prepare for a date?”

There wasn’t an answer. And soon the numbers on her clock had flipped to 18:00. She took a deep breath when she stood up, tensing up when she heard Dave’s voice from down the hall. 

“You ready to go?”

No, absolutely not. No way in heaven nor hell was she ready to go.

“Yes,” she answered despite herself, giving one final look over in the mirror before retreating into the living room. Dave was at the door with his eyes focused on his shirt’s cuffs. He had actually bothered to throw on a dress shirt, even matched it with a deep red tie and pants that weren’t jeans. He looked like a proper adult. And after he had figured out his cuffs and was draping his way into his sports jacket, he looked like a celebrity ripped straight out of a magazine.

Rose stumbled slightly as she walked over, really, really hoping he hadn’t noticed. Which apparently he didn’t. His gaze moved toward her and he seemed to stand up straighter, playing up a relaxed smile. Damn, he had to be wearing those stupid sunglasses again. The one time she would have liked a more detailed grasp of his expression.

“You look clean,” was her comment, a teasing smirk crossing her face as she avoided eye contact. She grabbed her clutch on the side table, fingering through jackets until she found one that was suitable. She owned too many. She did find one eventually, slipping her arms into the sleeves and making sure it sat right on her hips and shoulders.

“You look beautiful. Like, gorgeous, really.”

Pausing in place, Rose’s gaze fell to the floor. A familiar dread slammed down on her like a gavel, making her heart ache to her stomach and her throat run dry. She tried to swallow, but it just hurt. She felt close to shaking, thankful for the warmth of her coat. She slouched slightly as she moved to curl into herself and her arms folded over her chest. She wasn’t just nervous now. She was terrified. 

What the hell was he playing at, and why. What the fuck was that supposed to mean. Was she overdressed? Did she look unattractive in this? Was black a bad color for a date?

Gritting her teeth she forced a smile, eyes thinning as she shot him a glare.

“Thank you.”

He seemed to notice the change in her demeanor, but he ignored it, opting to open the door for her with a jingle of his keys.

“I picked the perfect place, just you wait and see.”

Rose felt another shiver, gripping her arms tighter to herself. She felt as though she was on the verge of tears, heat pooling in her cheeks. Her voice wavered as she spoke, trying to carry her voice far enough to actually be audible. 

“Sure.”

 

It was quiet car ride, all things considered. Rose faced the passenger window and focused on her breathing, in and out, slow and careful. Her eyes stayed open even as they dried. Blinking just brought her back, to terrible memories that she never wanted to relive. Feelings she didn’t want to relive. Most of all though, the pain she didn’t want to relive.

The restaurant Dave dragged her to wasn’t nearly as special as he had made it seem. She had been here plenty of times before. The menu hardly changed, so just walking through the doors was enough time for her to know what she wanted.

“It’s just too bad I can’t have a fancy glass of wine with dinner tonight, huh? We could get totally shitfaced and order spaghetti out the ass then go back to the apartment and just nurse food babies until we puked. That would be the fucking bomb.”

Rose could hardly muster up a smile. Her stomach was already aching without his bullshit, and she kept her eyes glued to anything that wasn’t him. He couldn’t have stayed oblivious forever, though, and upon sitting down and watching Rose order her meal instantly, he was finally speaking up.

“Are you feeling okay? You look like you’re about to pass out or something.” 

“I’m fine,” she snapped, eyes focused on the retreating waiter. “Please, just think of what you want to eat.”

“Whatever you say,” he responded quietly, his tone brimming in annoyed snotty douchebag. Rose almost wanted to yell at him, but he wasn’t worth it. Not right now. Not when she felt so extraordinarily terrible and unsafe. “I’m guessing you’ve been here before?”

Panicked, Rose looked over, a sharp inhale apparently alerting Dave. He looked up casually from his menu, idly flipping a page of it.

“You already knew what you wanted to eat, I mean. Like. That was literally instant.”

She tried to relax. She really did. She offered a nod, dropping her gaze. She was still struggling to breathe, closing her eyes and bearing the images just long enough to try and relax.

“Sorry,” was the next thing he said, sitting back in his seat and flipping his menu closed and flat. “Guess I kind of messed that up. I should have just asked instead of trying to be some hero about it.”

It wasn’t working. She just felt worse. Her stomach churned as she dropped her head in one hand. Why the hell was he being so nice. What was he trying to prove? That she was some shrewd bitch and he didn’t deserve her attitude? That was an obvious answer. That’s exactly what he was trying to say with this sudden date and these sudden compliments.

Well, she’d have to amp up that shrewd bitch for him, wouldn’t she.

“I’m kind of glad you actually agreed to this whole thing,” Dave said, letting a few moments of silence pass by. He might have been catching on to Rose’s attitude. Though to her, he had to have been an idiot to not have noticed it until now. And she knew better. Dave wasn’t an idiot. He was doing this on purpose. He was provoking her on purpose.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

Surprised to receive a response Dave looked up from where he was fiddling with his napkin, clearing his throat and taking his hands back to keep from fidgeting.

“I guess Jade sort of psyched me out when she offered me the room. Like there were all these rules I had to follow or else you were going to hate me. I’ve been scared of messing it up. Past couple weeks have gone pretty smoothly though, so I thought hey, maybe it really is okay now. But it still sort of felt like something was just lurking around the corner, you know.”

Rose’s tongue pressed into her cheek, throat clicking with a subtle eyeroll. There was something lurking alright. It being behind the corner, though? Debatable.

“But now that you’re here and we’re hanging out and stuff, it just feels way more calm. Like I don’t need to tiptoe anymore out of fear of hurting you or bugging you. We can just be friends and shit. I mean. That’s how I feel at least." 

The sincerity in his gaze was laughable. A tiny smile, fogged eyes, a facial expression Rose knew all too well as the practical poster-child of manipulation. 

“I appreciate the sentiment,” she said finally, sitting back in her seat and crossing one leg over the other. She started admiring her nails, making sure he was well aware how little she really cared about his friendship epiphany. “But I’m really not interested in being friends with you.”

That broke Dave’s expression. And as expected, it didn’t make him sad. He looked angry. Angry that she called him out on his lie- on his bullshit facade. His eyebrow jerked up and his eyes thinned and his lips curled into a heavy frown. Good.

“I beg-- and why not exactly?”

Rose hummed thoughtfully as her head tilted, uncurling fingers as every point passed by, counting them off.

“You’re antisocial, for starters. You stay locked in your room most of the day and whenever you do come out, you sit in silence. Or you just avoid the apartment all together. Your games of one-upmanship are not only immature, they’re weak. Really now, cleaning up my messes without so much as a word about it just to show me up on how I am, as you so eloquently put it, “a total slob.” You’re closed off, likely self-deprecating, you don’t share any of your work with me despite how highly you speak of it, and even when you called for that room, your first comment was that my taste was “shitty.” Is that sufficient?”

Dave stayed relatively calm. But why wouldn’t he? They were in a restaurant, afterall. More than the perfect place for Rose to unload. A place where he couldn’t fight back lest he make a scene. And Rose knew from the way Dave constantly hid away that he wouldn’t risk something like that. He cared too much about his reputation to dare show his flaws to an audience- no matter how small.

“You know what,” he said eventually, quiet, face to his lap. He gave a nod of his head and reached to the table, picking up his sunglasses and unfolding the arms. He sat them on top of his head while he stood up, his other hand diving into his pocket and pulling out his car keys. “I’m not even going to argue with this. No matter how misconstrued, and hypocritical the things you say about me are, you can just think them. I’m out.”

Her eyes stayed glued to his back as he walked away and headed for the door. He wasn’t serious. He wasn’t honestly serious? He was going to walk out on her and leave her here? Seemingly that’s exactly what he was going to do. Minutes passed and there was no sign of him. 

Dave Strider had given up. 

Carefully she stood, fingering through her clutch and resting down a 50 dollar bill. She certainly had no desire to eat here after that commotion. She had no desire to eat here in the first place. She was nice enough to explain the situation to the hostess to pass on, but didn’t stay longer than that.

Even more thankful for that jacket than before she started down the sidewalk, rubbing her arms as she made her way for the bus stop.

Traveling home, she tried to stay optimistic. Not only had she won, she had done it in the most satisfying way possible. She did it where he couldn’t argue, or fight her, or even deny that she was right. She forced him to listen, forced him to understand, and forced him to face exactly who he was. She was relieved. So damn relieved. She won the game. No matter how much he tried to throw at her, she came out on top. He wasn’t the one to contain her. She just gave him the boot.

So why, despite all of that, was she carrying around such a heavy heart and painful feeling of dread?

 

When she entered the apartment- take out in hand- that feeling was tenfold. It sunk through her chest and buried into the pit of her stomach. Dave had a cardboard box sitting on the kitchen table. His turntables were disassembled.

He really was leaving.

She felt herself panicking all over again. This wasn’t what she wanted. She didn’t want him to give up, and she certainly didn’t want to be left alone. She just wanted him to cool it with the compliments with all the hidden meanings and ulterior motives.

Somehow that feeling lessened when he came down the hallway, his camera in hand as he carefully wrapped the strap of it around the lens. He ignored her presence when he moved into the kitchen, carefully setting the camera in the box.

“You... You’re leaving?” She choked, fumbling with coat buttons. Why wasn’t this making her feel successful?

“Yeah, I am,” he answered, keeping his back to her as he started unpacking his box and rearranging it. “I’m real sorry, Rose, but I can’t do this anymore. I have college to prepare for and a job to focus on, not to mention all the projects I have going. I need to actually be able to do those things and have a fucking life. I can’t put all my time into babysitting you and trying not to upset you when all you’re doing is working against me and searching for whatever semblance of an issue you can find.”

She held her tongue. It was definitely his turn to talk. That was obvious. She wasn’t really sure why it wasn’t obvious before.

“When I told you that I liked to take photos and I made music, that was me being genuine. And your response was genuine. That was us sharing an interest and understanding each other. I get that sarcastic banter can be fun, but it stops being fun when you start acting like it’s all that matters. You take it so seriously and act like everything has some hidden meaning, but it doesn’t. Sometimes people are real with each other.”

“I just thought-” 

“What exactly? That I only asked you to dinner so I could make you think I liked you and laugh about it behind your back?” Dave turned around, leaving his things unpacked and laid out across the table. “Rose, you know me. Not like you know Jade, not like my brother knows me, sure, but you know stuff about me. You know I like really terrible shark movies and I’m too insecure to play my music for people and I’m scared of puppets. Do you really think someone who has nightmares about Sesame Street could ever for one second devise a plan like you apparently thought I did?”

She found herself laughing at that, lifting a hand up to wipe her face. There weren’t any tears yet but she could feel them. Her eyes were stinging and her throat was burning.

“I like you, Rose. Your sarcastic banter and the way you get flustered when I compliment your food or how you scurry away when I ask you to play your music. I have no reason to try and trick you into feeling safe. I just want you to feel safe. But you seriously need to fucking realize that the harder you try to find the worst in people, the more of it you’re going to see. And not because you were right all along. Just because you’re making stuff up to the point where people don’t want to bother trying to prove you wrong anymore.”

 

The apartment fell silent aside from the hum of the refrigerator. Dave turned away after a couple moments, sighing to himself. He really didn’t feel all that great about snapping at Rose. After all he knew that she was like this, he was specifically warned and he was specifically given the job of not messing with it. This was messing with it.

When he looked back at her though, she didn’t seem angry. She was perfectly still, her coat hanging open and her hands gripping tightly to the purse she had brought to dinner. He couldn’t see her eyes where her bangs were hanging over them, her gaze cast downward.

He had to say something. He didn’t want to imagine what a trainwreck like Rose was probably constructing in her head right now. She was constantly filling in blanks for herself and this was one of those times when he couldn’t let her do that. Not when things were this unstable.

“Look do you want me to stay or what. Because I’d like to. I like it here. You’re a good roommate and you’re fun to talk to and spend time with. But I get it if you’d rather I leave. I did sort of just yell at you and abandon you in a restaurant. I’d have it coming if you told me to get lost.”

“I don’t understand.”

Dave shut himself up, just observing while Rose reached for her face. Fuck, he made her cry. This was definitely game over.

“Should we maybe sit down and actually talk about it without the guessing games?”

She nodded.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note an autoplay warning if you choose to click the second link!

Twenty minutes later they were seated on the couch. Rose needed to calm down, according to her. She was bordering on hysterics- he could tell- and he wasn’t about to push his luck with something like that. So he put his things away while she made herself tea, and after putting the television on low volume as background noise, they sat together wrapped in blankets.

“So what exactly is hard for you to understand,” he tried, keeping his gaze off of her. Fuck if he wanted to turn around all the progress they’d gotten through, so he’d have to watch his step. He really wanted to believe that Rose was going to cooperate and try not to turn every thing he said into an ulterior motive dramathon. But he’d also gotten a pretty good whiff of it already tonight.

“It’s hard for me to understand why... You would want to be so nice to me, if not to take advantage of it, and rip it out from under me.”

He felt his shoulders lower as he propped his head up attentively. That wasn’t a sentiment you heard very often. 

“I’m gonna say because you’re a human being with feelings and part of feeling happy is being treated with respect.”

“But why would you care if I was happy?”

“Why wouldn’t I care?”

That one she had to stall on, staring into her tea.

“Well, switch it around,” he suggested, lolling his head to the side a bit. “Why do you want others to feel happy? Why do you hold the door open for people or tell them they look good.”

“I think it must be how I was raised.”

Sounds about right.

“Well yeah, most of us get raised to treat others well.”

“No, that’s not what I mean.”

He watched her carefully. Her eyes were still glued downward.

“Perhaps ‘how I was raised’ isn’t quite the right term. Something like ‘the environment I was brought up in’ might be more appropriate.”

Now he was treading in dangerous waters. He lowered his voice and stayed still, making sure her space stayed her space.

“What about the environment you were brought up in?”

That was when she looked up, somehow smiling despite her words. Past the smile though, her eyes were glossy and the way she paled made it apparent just how broken she was actually feeling.

“It made me believe there was no such thing as doing something nice for others.”

Dave stayed quiet while she spoke, keeping his eyes on her face while hers darted around. She looked at her lap, at the TV, at her hands, but never at him. Her voice was strained, clearly feeling overwhelmed, but despite what he would expect from her, she continued.

“My mother and I, we didn’t talk much when I was growing up. Not like you would expect a mother and daughter to. She was very successful, very rich. Still is. A scientist.”

He answered with a nod to indicate he was listening.

“She wasn’t a bad mother. She never put me down or yelled. But it always felt like she never actually wanted me around. She treated me like a guest instead of a daughter. And instead of getting to know me or _treating_ me like her daughter she just. Bought me a lot of things. She threw money around like crazy to try and make me smile. Because she didn’t know of any other way to do it. I don’t know, I’m guessing she might have had me young and didn’t really know how to handle it.”

Dave’s eyebrows stitched together, trying to fill in his questions about her with the story she was telling. Were her experiences with her mother and the way she second guessed everyone really related at all?

“So that’s what I always thought of it as. If you buy me presents, I assume it’s because you don’t know how to make me happy. If you compliment me you’re just trying to make yourself look like you care so I fall for it. If you say thank you... It’s because it’s the most generic thing you can say.”

“Some people are going to be like that,” he finally said, turning his eyes away from her just as she was looking up at him. “But you have to give them a chance to show that they aren’t before you counter attack.”

“I know,” she admitted. He wasn’t surprised. Rose was emotional and presumptuous but she wasn’t stupid. She was far from stupid and Dave knew as well as she did that there was no way after this long she wasn’t aware that her bad habits weren’t truths to live by. “I did that once.”

Dave adjusted himself in his seat. Rose’s eyes were glued to the television again, a small smile creeping across her lips as she sipped her tea.

“My last girlfriend. Jade coached me into putting my guard down and I actually managed it. We dated for awhile actually. It was a lot of progress for me. I tended to just sleep around when I first started college.”

He started picking at his nails idly as she spoke. He found his jaw was clenching a bit. This must have been the girl Jade had mentioned before. The one sensitive to booze.

“She was beautiful,” Rose continued, turning in her seat to bring her legs up on the couch. Her toes brushed against his leg and he looked up to look at them. Of course the nails were painted black. “Elegant and charming. She took herself a bit too seriously, though. She had a few goofy moments that I tended to seize and she opened up rather well, actually. So did I.”

“I loved spending time with her. She would sew and I would knit and we would just bask in the fact that neither of us ever needed men. Embarrassing her was fun. Teasing her was fun.”

“Guessing you’re still pretty into her,” he muttered, eyes on his fingers.

“No,” she answered simply, shrugging her shoulders. He looked up with a tilt of his head, just catching her fingers gliding up to push her hair behind her ear. “It’s been nearly a year. I don’t really think about her anymore.”

“Jade mentioned an ex-girlfriend that dumped you over your drinking. Same one?” Rose scoffed.

“Yes and no.”

“Yes _and_ no?”

“Yes, she’s talking about the same girlfriend I am. But that isn’t why she dumped me. That’s just what I told everyone. I was humiliated by the real reason.”

“That being?”

An offended laugh came from her, but when he looked up she had a smile on her face. She picked up one of the throw pillows and swung it over, slapping Dave on the shoulder. It made him grin, his hair floating up with the breeze.

“Why should I tell you if I haven’t told anyone else?”

“Because I just told you that I ate my boogers until I was 14.”

“Are you serious?”

“Why would I lie about something like that?”

Rose gave a shake to her head as her grin faded into a smaller smile. Now she was admiring her hands. Her voice was starting to strain again.

“She actually uh. Had a really Christian mother. She dumped me when her family found out about us. Went back into the closet, called me a devil’s temptress. Even now I’m not really sure if she meant it or if she was just trying to make me hate her for my own good. It killed me so I just... Lied. And I haven’t really opened up to anyone since.”

Dave wasn’t really sure how that whole thing worked, seeing as he had never even been interested in the same sex, but he did sympathize. Everyone had opened up to someone that ended up being a regret. It was practically a rite of passage.

“So that’s why you’re so wary of me? You expect me to up and leave like she did? Or to manipulate you? It’s not really about the whole everyone’s leaving because of your games thing.”

“Has Jade been shrinking me behind my back? That bitch.” The joking was clear in her tone. Her toes curled as she used one foot to scratch the other. “I’d say it was both. I mean, if I didn’t assume everyone was going to leave, I wouldn’t play the game in the first place.”

From what Dave could tell, the Lalonde riddle was beginning to come undone. She seemed significantly more relaxed even as she spilled her life story. Looking at her now, his eyes darted to the box where he had left his camera. Going to get it now might break the flow they had going. She was joking around like usual and she wasn’t playing the pompous stuck up bitch like she usually did. It was refreshing.

“You seemed kind of disappointed when you thought I was going to leave.”

There was a long pause. Rose stared at the floor for a moment before she looked over at him, blinking slowly. “I was disappointed. Even throughout my situation at dinner, I thought you were different. More honest and up front. I thought you would find a way to counter and we’d banter more.”

“So,” he started, giving his hands a clap. His feet lifted onto the couch, crossed over, and he wrapped his hands around his ankles. “What’s next then? Let’s get it out in the open. We got another four months together, we might as well stop the games.”

She answered with an agreeing nod, slowly smiling. “I’d like if you stayed. I feel comfortable with you.”

“I can do that,” he answered, nodding his head. “I’ll even keep cleaning up after you, if you promise to never again take it as some passive aggressive dig at you. I don’t care if you’re messy. It’s a character trait I have no reason to get all up in arms about it. That’d be like you coming home wearing 50 pairs of sunglasses just to make a dig at my eye problems.”

Now she was full on laughing, tossing her head back with it. “Okay, I promise, I will let you clean up after me in peace. And keep cooking you meals.”

“And look I’m not going to ask you to trust me with all your might or whatever, I get you gotta sort of relearn some stuff and that shit takes time, but please at least consciously consider just telling me what’s on your mind next time you’re upset about something or got a problem with me. This moment on we are officially friends, okay?”

He held out his hand. There was still a nervous fear in her eyes but she reached for it, taking it in hers and giving it a shake.

“Alright.”

“We are entrenched in this bitch. After.”

“After?”

He dropped her hand and got up from the couch, pointing behind her toward her bedroom door.

“Go get your violin. We’re jamming to seal this deal.”

“I thought you didn’t play for people?” She teased, though she did turn to get to her feet.

“Neither do you. We’re both going out of our comfort zone. Sign of trust and all that shit.”

He really would have said gay shit but that sounded insensitive after she opened her heart about a shitty ex-girlfriend.

“Alright,” she agreed, walking past the TV and heading toward her room. “But you best not chicken out on me, Dave Strider.”

He played up a smirk. He was nervous. Hells of nervous. He hadn’t finished an actual song in weeks. He did have one that was just missing one rad solo that none of his virtual instruments seemed to do justice. Maybe he could pose that challenge to her after a bit of practice.

 

He set up his station while he waited for Rose. She eventually came out violin in one hand and bow in the other, still in her gown from dinner. She looked like she was getting ready to perform for an audience. Maybe this felt the same to her?

“So where do we start?”

“I’ll mix something for you to test the waters with. Just give me something to sample. Eight bars. Riff something for a background beat.”

Slowly and hesitantly she approached, stepping toe-heel like a ballet dancer. She found a spot and stood still, glancing up at him with a quiet, “Here?”

“Yeah that’s fine,” he assured her, setting himself up to sample. “Go ahead, I’m ready.”

With a deep inhale she moved her violin and rested it against her neck, eyes steady in thought as her fingers found their place. She lifted her bow three separate times before she touched it to the strings, starting surprisingly upbeat and rhythmic.

After he had sampled her riff he gave a nod, playing it back to himself and listening through his headphones. She had put her instrument to her sides as she watched him, as if she was waiting on hearing about a music scholarship. She really didn’t play for people often did she?

“Check it out.” He offered a second pair of headphones to her. They were clunkier, older, not nearly as high tech as his current ones. But they were still good enough to get the job done. Even if they looked a bit silly on her head. “I’m gonna keep recording, so feel free to jump in anytime with something else. I can mix around you.”

He played back her sample. She listened to it a few times as it repeated, closing her eyes and counting the beats. When it started for the fourth time she prepared her violin again, waiting until the end of the sample and starting again to play. This time her tune was slow, gentle, somewhat melancholy. It was mesmerizing how well it contrasted. Dave listened as she continued through a few more bars, and after a minute, he had it.

Another button pressed started one of his drum samples, backing up her melody. One by one he added elements, eventually closing his eyes and pulling back one of his discs to start scratching. She stopped playing after a bit as he worked, ending her part of their song. She watched him carefully, eyes wide in wonder.

He added a few of his stock tunes. Scratched through them, kept up the drums, all with her sample playing through the background.

Abruptly he stopped all the parts at once, letting the stock play a couple more times before fading out. Rose waited patiently as Dave listened to it all again. Then, warily, he moved to play back the entire track.

She seemed just as nervous as him. He was so fucking anxious, wandering backward until he was backing up against the window seat. He flopped down onto it and kept his eyes off of her. She looked absolutely ridiculous with both ears of the headphones on instead of just one like he usually wore them.

[He hit play](https://homestuck.bandcamp.com/track/derse-dreamers). She closed her eyes while she listened. Her fingers danced idly, likely along with her chords. At one point she paused, eyes opening suddenly. He nervously took a glance, thumb slipping into his mouth to chew his nail. She seemed... Pleased?

Eventually she smiled, balancing her violin and bow in one hand so she could lift the other and hold the headphone closer to her face. She really did like it then? Fuck, that made his stomach leap in excitement. He never remembered being this nervous about people looking at his photos. Why was this so different?

After a few minutes she pulled the headphones down around her neck, offering up another smile. She seemed calmer than she was when they were talking. He probably shouldn’t have been surprised by that, what with the effect of music and how much time had passed.

“That was incredible,” she said finally. His heart leaped. “I can’t believe you could make something so wonderful just from me playing a few riffs.”

Fuck. Dave could feel his face turning into a tomato and it made him want to punch something. But he forced up a smile, bashfully accepting the compliment with a shy and quiet, “Thanks. But I mean, you sort of had a lot to do with it, too, so... Don’t give me all the credit.”

Rose dug her free hand into the fabric of her skirt and offered a curtsy.

“I don’t play as often as I should,” she said, looking down to admire her violin. “My desire sort of dulled down after my broken heart finished healing.”

Dave watched her face for a few moments, turning to glance at his records before looking back up at her. “Help me finish a song.”

She seemed surprised. “What?”

“I have a song,” he started, standing up and moving back over to his tables. He hit the button it was assigned to, letting it play through her headphones. She brought one of the ears up as the song started. “There’s room for a solo, I just know it, but nothing I put out is any good. You should do it.”

“Dave I couldn’t do that,” she stuttered, trying to pull her headphones off. But he held up a hand.

“Just listen and decide after.”

She seemed to agree, giving a slight nod and closing her eyes. She pulled the headphones up properly. Dave’s nerves were going wild watching her listen. This was probably one of his tracks nearest completion, closer than anyone before it, and he was sort of dumbfounded and mad at himself that he was letting someone listen to it. But if he wanted Rose to open up, he had to give something in return. This was his sacrifice.

Rose pulled the headphones down as the song ended, mulling it over for a moment before finally deciding on, “Play it again and try recording.”

Dave did as he was told, restarting his song and hitting record for her. Half the song went before before she adjusted her violin, putting her bow to the strings.

The tune started with a long note this time, unraveling into a desperate and hopeful tune. Dave sat up as he listened, watching her every move while she played. Her eyes were closed as she focused on the music, lips quivering in concentration. Her face was flushing, her body was turning slowly, dress fluttering around her legs and her hair near perfect in its usual bob aside from the few strays that swayed against her.

The melody was short as a solo should be but she continued, a quick back and forth rhythm joining into his original fade out. It seemed to be the same tune he had laid down, just an extra layer of it. She played through to the end before she pulled her bow back away from strings. She brought her headphones back down, gesturing for him to listen.

She was red in the face, chest rising and falling quickly. From the looks of things, that gave her quite the adrenaline rush. He was mesmerized with her face. He hadn’t seen her that passionate about anything. Not even when she was giving him that spiel about art. He had just witnessed Rose Lalonde in her absolute truest form.

And it had to have been the most gorgeous thing he’d ever seen.

“Tell me if that’s any good.”

“It was good,” he refuted quickly, pulling his headphones up as he stammered. “I don’t think I’ve heard anything more emotional in my life. That was gorgeous. Incredible. How did you even come up with that?”

She flushed all over again before she smirked weakly at him. “Just see if it fits your vision. This is your song. The last thing I want would be to ruin it.”

That was fair enough. Keeping his eyes on the buttons of his soundboard he put the headphones over his ears, [playing the new track](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B6e2XacZSIs).

It was the same song it always had been at first. The quick, burst of a start, gentle and looming ringing, worrying guitar riff with accompanying piano. The rhythm was pure music, a harmony of strings leading into where he had always just been a flat blank. But then with a burst of life her violin started. It dragged against his harmony, contrasting like he had always dreamed. His esophagus clenched, a shiver crawling up his spine as he listened. It was exactly as he had always dreamed it was going to be. To a T. It was perfect.

By the time he finished the song he was shaking, arms covered in goosebumps. He had to force out a weak laugh, putting the headphones onto his soundboard. He moved toward the table, letting himself pull his camera out of the box he had been packing. He took it back to the living room, and snapped a photo of Rose, violin still in hand. She must be used to it by now, by the way she smiled easily and quirked an eyebrow up at him.

He finally managed to look her in the eye, hands gripping tight to his camera. She looked so hopeful. Eyes wide, smile just breaking the surface, a hand buried into the skirt of her dress from the nerves.

“That’s it. That’s exactly what I was looking for.” 


	11. Chapter 11

“You want a refill?”

Rose’s fingers kept traveling over her laptop keys. She had finally gained a full grasp on the novel she had started weeks ago. After ages of struggling with this new character, she finally found her voice and she was nearly finished the entire book. Even between work and classes, she was writing every free moment she had. The story of the witch and her visitor was coming together well. 

“Sorry, what?”

She finally paused at the end of her sentence, looking up at Dave where his fingers balanced an empty cup between them and gave it an informative shake. 

“Another tea. Or are you done for the day?”

Idly she turned her head away, glancing at the back of his laptop where he had left it open on the table they were sharing. Sometime two weeks ago Rose started doubling up her writing time with his and ever since they wrote together every day. Rose worked on her novel, Dave worked on his screenplay. The afternoons were almost entirely silent and never once had they ever shared their work with each other.

“Sure, I think I can do one more.”

He seemed to light up as he gave a nod and flashed a smirk, smoothly sliding his way back behind the counter to refill her drink. After their jam session something felt different. Rose figured it had to be the way she finally opened herself up to him and told him why she was the way she was. Sure, they had hit a couple snags, but somehow the way he was understanding and sympathetic as he just reassured her even when she was angry with him didn’t come across as condescending and she found it easy to listen to his logic and calm down.

Mostly though, Dave seemed different. He was still as nice as he always was, still as sarcastic and talkative and occasionally moronic, but he was out of his room more, he talked more, he even smiled more. He was just pleasant. Simple and pleasant. She enjoyed his company, even if he near constantly had his camera in her face. She liked writing with him and watching movies with him and telling him how she was feeling whenever he would take the time to ask.

He came back with two cups in hand. He set one down next to his computer, offering the other directly to her. She gave a thanks when she took it, flashing a smile and settling back in her seat.

“You know,” she started, pausing for a drink, “I think you may be the reason this story has been going so much easier for me.”

He grunted when he flopped back into his seat, rocking himself forward to grab his drink before scooting towards the table to arrange himself behind his laptop again. “How do you figure that?”

“It’s not as though I’ve had many male influences in my life. When I was working on this story last month, all my trouble was in introducing a male character. Probably one of the first I’ve ever written. At least, as a young hero instead of an aged guide. I’m beginning to think you’re the reason I was able to do it. I hope he’s not too much like you.”

Dave lit up, laughing to himself with a sip of his drink. “I hope he’s exactly like me. I hope he mixes medieval music and likes ironic plays. I hope he’s named Da’lyvaien and he turns out to be the greatest swordsman in all of Europe along with being a master magician.”

Rose snorted into the back of her hand, setting her drink to the side and pulling her computer back into her lap. “Oh, yes. And he’s easily defeated when he enters a magic village and its main attraction is a ventriloquist booth.”

“That isn’t funny.”

She laughed anyway, feeling his eyes on her even through his sunglasses. “In fact, I’m rewriting this entire book and it’s just going to be that. Da’lyvaien’s mission to overcome his deep-seated fear of talking puppets. Only done of course by making love to one.”

“I swear to God.”

Her laughter died down as she offered sympathy, reading back to herself the last paragraph she wrote. Maybe she didn’t have any more in her today. She tipped her screen down as she worked more on her drink, turning to watch while Dave diligently tapped at his keyboard.

Dave was much more into his work when he wrote. He always slouched and loomed over his computer, working hard without pause. Rose was casual and calm, more about details than speed. She supposed that was the difference in the mediums.

“You never gave me much detail about that screenplay of yours,” she told him, eyeing his face as it didn’t falter from his concentration.

“Sure I did,” he refuted, barely pausing the strides of his fingers. “It’s based on characters I made when I was a kid. That’s it.”

“That can’t be it. What happens? What are they like?”

Dave gave a sigh, smirking over helplessly as he admitted defeat.

“If you must know, it’s just a dude and his friend. They get in a fight because Jeff fu— screwed his friend’s mom and they have to rekindle their broship through a series of challenges given to them by a friendly pair of motivational black guys, only to rise up against them together which turns out to be the true test all along.”

Rose had to take a moment to digest that. It sounded like any usual movie meant for the rapid consumption of stoners and teenage boys. And with some consideration, it sounded exactly like something Dave would write- at least in an ironic fashion.

“That sounds like something I could enjoy if I tried,” she admitted, offering a shrug. “Maybe only because you wrote it, though.”

He seemed to flush a bit, smirking to himself when he got back to writing. “I call it Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff The Moive.”

“Wait, what?”

They exchanged glances, Rose’s eyes thinning. “Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff. You mean those shitty webcomics from 2006? The whole ‘I warned you about stairs’ meme?”

Dave flushed even more, immediately sitting back in his chair and covering his face with both hands.

“Yeah... That was me.”

She started laughing all over again, sitting back in her own seat and resting her head back. “You’ve got to be kidding me! I was obsessed with that stuff when I was 13. I’ve been rooming with the author for a month? Let me just go back in time and let past me know this is going to happen so she can prepare her fanfics.”

“Do not fuck with time travel,” he warned. “Please do not tell me that you actually wrote fanfiction. Because if you did, I want to read it.”

“I’m sure fanfiction dot net deleted it a long time ago. Besides, you don’t want to read something I wrote when I was 13. Unless you have a fetish for comma splices.”

“I absolutely do have a fetish for comma splices.”

Things dialed down as he got back to work. Rose managed to pump out a couple more paragraphs between distracting herself with sipping from her drink and people-watching. She watched as Dave slowly started decelerating, finishing off his drink and eventually sitting back to relax.

“So how about I read something from recently?”

Instinctively she answered with a scoff, panicked to close her laptop as quick as possible, as if he could actually read it from the opposite side of the table. 

“No, you know how I felt on that. Not until I’m published.”

He shrugged his shoulders. Apparently he was actually going respect it this time. Probably because he could actually sympathize considering the state of his music. At least, when it came to most people.

“Then... Something early? Doesn’t need to be fanfic early. It’s just fair, you know? You know my comics.”

With a stare of desperation she finally breathed out a smirk, rolling her eyes. She completely closed her laptop, leaning over the arm of her seat to slide it back into her bag.

“Fine. I’ll let you read the first novel I ever completed. Back when I didn’t know how queries and agents worked and I actually spent a week’s allowance on printing it entirely off in the library on beautiful cardstock and an assload of unnecessary shipping to get the envelope out.”

Dave had a chuckle to himself but otherwise didn’t comment. He followed suit with putting away his things, finishing off his drink in a few gulps. She found herself staring at his adam’s apple as it bobbed, embarrassment flooding as she looked away. The past couple of weeks she had been doing that a lot- some part of her gaze locking itself on him and staying there until she was too far gone to get away with it. It probably started about the time that Dave started getting comfortable enough to not run back to his room to get dressed right after his shower. She’d seen his be-toweled backside a couple times in the past few days.

She really wasn’t complaining.

They headed out to his car once they were organized. Rose made herself comfortable in the front seat, commenting on some poorly dressed tourists they drove by. Dave laughed and started telling his own story about their lives. A couple that had been together since they were six, didn’t have a care in the world about anything but each other and lived day to day, living their dream of traveling America and buying a pair of crocs from every official retailer in the country. She told him that should be his next movie plot. He wholeheartedly agreed.

  

When they got back, Dave dumped his bag on the couch and took a seat. 

“What would they even be named? Cheryl and Jacques? Those sound like good names. Jacques can be a military man and Cheryl his nurse wife.”

Rose scoffed from the other room, digging up on the top of her bookshelf to find her promised manuscript. “I think you’re era jumping here a little bit,” she called, grunting as something fell on her head. “I’m pretty sure nobody wore crocs during World War II.”

“You’re _pretty sure_ or you’re _sure_? Because those are two different things.”

She didn’t offer an answer, just smiling to herself as she brought out the book. It was held together with a binder clip, still shoved in its original envelope, torn open at the top. She’d removed the rejection letter ages ago to put in her collection, but she figured that wasn’t important to him. Once she was back in the living room she tossed it in his lap, smirking at the way he played up an exasperated grunt from the force of it.

“Goddamn, is this a novel or the final seven volumes of the Bible?”

“Both,” she answered, flopping down next to him and crossing her legs. She leaned in a bit closer, fingering through her bangs. “Now shut up and read if you’re so interested in reading it.”

He lifted up the first few pages, folding them over to the back once he had found the start of chapter one. “So is this one of those wizard things or something different?”

An embarrassed laugh was all she could manage at first, turning away from him with a slight lean. Dear God, she really did write too much about them. “No it’s the same as all the others.” There was a pause when he snickered, eyes scanning across pages as he read. “Don’t you fucking laugh, you’re writing about characters you’ve been writing about for seven years so you’re no better.”

He only laughed harder. “Touché.”

A few pages in and Rose got bored of watching him read. She brought her things back to her room and tidied up a bit, even finding a place to put her violin that was out in the open as opposed to stored away where she would never see it. She wandered through the apartment with thing after thing, and the entire time Dave was seated on the couch, reading away.

Being Rose’s first book it was short compared to most. Dave was making good time, well over half finished by the time she had started preparing dinner.

“So wait, is Zazzerpan the old one or is Frigglish the old one. Also what the fuck kind of names are these.”

Rose laughed when she dropped veggies into a pan, enjoying the sound as they started to sizzle. “If I had to guess, I would say it switched back and forth as I wrote. It’s not as though continuity was a strong suit of mine when I was 13-years-old.”

That seemed to get his attention; she could hear the way his voice had raised to speak over her cooking. “Wait, you wrote this when you were 13? Jesus, and there I was making shitty MS Paint comics about Jeff and Bro. It could have been Sweet Zazzerpan and Hella Frigglish all this time.”

A hand slapped over her mouth as she snorted, breaking out into rather spirited laughter. “Seeing my characters in your art style would be a dream come true.”

Dave had to laugh too, even though when she looked back at him, he was still diligently reading. “Uhhhh Frigglish, what happened to your GAINT NECK COCK?” His fingers poked the air as he positioned the words in his imagination. “Tick tick tick tick. Oh you gave it to that rockelocking pimpuhpuh. Intoducing the new friend........... Calmasis!”

“Jesus _Christ._ ”

Somehow it felt totally relaxing to have Dave mocking her past self’s hard work. And not just because she mocked his comics her entire life, either. She just didn’t feel insulted. She felt like she could laugh with his criticisms because he made them in such a lighthearted way there wasn’t any point in being upset by it. He was different than the waves of hate mail she would get online. The exact opposite of the mother who would skim a few pages and leave it at that with nothing but a “very cool”. He was someone that she actually had come to trust in the time they had been together and she trusted everything that he was saying now.

 

He didn’t put the manuscript down until it was time to eat, at which time he left it propped open on his current page and slid himself into his seat. He had his fucking camera with him again.

“You know that book actually isn’t that bad,” he offered, fork dipping into his stir fry. “I mean, the writing is pretty god awful since you were like five, but you didn’t have that bad of a plot going on. I bet those characters would be amazing if you worked with them now.”

She tried to laugh off his compliments, avoiding eye contact while she ate. Though she could hear the click of his camera’s shutter. “Yeah, sure, regular underdeveloped and awkward messes, but now with better physical descriptions.”

Dave had a bit of a smile, but he was insistent. She could feel his gaze on her as his toes nudged at her shin. “I’m serious. You let me read what you’re working on now and I guarantee you it’ll be as good as I’m saying it is. I’m psychic like that. Better yet, I’m from the future. I’m one of your biggest fans and I time traveled back to this century to infiltrate your personal life and live my dream of being your inspiration.”

Rose rolled her eyes. In all honesty she loved Dave’s bullshit, even if it was cliché and occasionally frustrating. Somehow she was never doubtful that if she asked him to stop, he would in a heartbeat. That’s what made it so easy to enjoy.

“I’m almost finished with the book I’m writing now. You give me three weeks for edits and to send it off to an agent and if they give it the go ahead, you can be the first to read it.”

He was unimpressed, chewing with a defeated shrug of his shoulders.

“What do you think of it?”

The question caught her off guard. What did she think of her own work? Had she even considered something like that before? Usually her opinion was guided only by the opinions of others. Glancing up at him she tried to think about it. What did she think about her own book, using only what she knew to decide?

“It’s... Probably the best thing I’ve written in my life,” she decided, dropping her head slightly to the side. “I’ve upped the character diversity and I’ve done a decent job writing them, if I were to compare them to similar characters that I’ve read. This is the first time I’ve written a male hero that’s truly believable and I’ve significantly upped the involvement of the gender fluidity of the side character. I mean, Calmasis was completely agender but it was never really commented upon. It was just sort of there because I wasn’t really sure what I was doing at the time. I’m...Proud of myself. And considering the improvement I’ve done, it makes me eager to take it a few steps further the next time around. To push myself to do even more.”

Yeah, that was about right. And that wasn’t even getting into how much more involved this plot was compared to others, or how much her writing in general had improved. She really was happy with this book.

“See,” he answered, and she felt his toes against her legs again. “You don’t need publishers to tell you what you’ve done is brilliant. How you feel is what’s most important. That sounded like a really cheesy comic book line but you know, it’s still true.”

Weeks ago, hearing that statement come out of his mouth again would have infuriated her. She would have snapped and complained and insulted him. But now it just made her smile. He was right, after all. She spent way too much time focusing and worrying about what everyone else was thinking that she never bothered to stop and consider how she felt. How could she be an artist if she didn’t care about what she was doing?

He didn’t wait for an answer before he got up from the table. He put away his plate, tidied up the counters, then returned right back to the couch to continue reading. She watched him for a minute in admiration before smiling, standing from the table to clear her own plate. Tonight she did the dishes, dismissing his protests.

She left him alone to finish, opting to return to her room. She pulled out her violin and practiced, recreating the solo she had played for him the night they played together. It didn’t sound the same without his additions, but she still felt comfortable surrounded by the sound. It was like a soft blanket, keeping her warm with the memory of that night.

 

When Dave knocked on her door she was curled up on her bed, changed into her pajama shorts with her knees propped up and her text book open against her thighs. His knock was pretty quiet- cautious, in case she had already fallen asleep.

“Come in.”

Sheepishly he slid through the door, giving a nonchalant wave of the manuscript in his hand.

“I’m finished.”

She gestured to her desk, where the envelope was still resting. He moved in the room slowly, trying not to be obvious as he snuck glances around the room. Rose’s ankles crossed a bit tighter, suddenly a bit self conscious of just how much of her legs were showing.

“Was it everything you have always dreamed of?” She asked, closing her textbook on one of her fingers to give him her full attention. He was awkwardly trying to slide the paper stack back into its sleeve, turning it every which direction while he did.

“Yeah, actually. I’m glad you didn’t go with some crummy happy ever after ending. That dream shit is so fucking bad, too. This ending was actually satisfying. Like, it was terrible and frustrating but it was really good. You’ve got a knack for a good story. All that’s left is filling it with some good characters and executing it well. And we both know you’ve probably got that covered by now.”

She offered a shrug, flushing slightly while she snuck a glance at him. His sunglasses were hanging off the collar of his shirt now that it was night time. There was something about the way the tan on his cheeks curved around where those glasses always rested that was endearing. It was probably the most embarrassing way to ever get a farmer‘s tan, but somehow it suited him. Like he was always blushing under his freckles.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said, finally getting the book back in the bag and resting it on her desk. She offered a goodnight as he started to leave, reopening her textbook to find where she left off.

“Oh and.” He paused in the doorway, playing off his pride. “Thanks for letting me read that. I know it was probably tough for you.”

There was a moment of silence before she smiled up at him, extending her legs ever so slightly and letting him take a glance at the backs of her thighs.

“Actually, it wasn’t as tough as it usually is.”

He left with a smirk, (but not before snapping another photo), carefully closing the door behind him. After a moment of stalling Rose bit her bottom lip, once again folding her book closed on her thumb and picking up her cell phone.

 

ROSE LALONDE [09:46 PM]: Jade, remember how you said forever ago that Dave was cute?  
ROSE LALONDE [09:47 PM]: And I told you how preposterous that was, and how finding boys cute was childish?  
ROSE LALONDE [09:47 PM]: I believe this is my official notice of admitted defeat.   
JADE HARLEY [10:10 PM]: aw man!!  
ROSE LALONDE [10:12 PM]: What?  
JADE HARLEY [10:13 PM]: if you get a boyfriend im going to actually have to start going on dates!!!! that sucks!!! 


	12. Chapter 12

His work day had only just begun and already his eyes were trained on the shop door. In just a few hours Rose Lalonde would be walking through that door with her computer bag over her shoulder, ready for her Earl Grey and four hours of writing. It was a tradition, and he’d grown fond of doing it every day.

Honestly, he’d just grown fond of being anywhere near her no matter what they were doing.

As her attitude improved, he found himself liking her more. Not in the “he was changing her to be more like he wanted” kind of way, but in that he was just so proud of her for being able to see a flaw in her personality and be able to admit it and actively work toward changing it. They could still snark back and forth, they could still make fun of eachother, but she was getting less defensive, less excitable, and there hadn’t been a repeat of what happened at the restaurant. She really was improving. And the best part of that was, despite his interference, he knew she was improving for herself.

She still had moments of paranoia, but when he called her out on it she didn’t try and deny it or act like she was too good to be worried about this or that. She admitted it so he could refute what she thought and they moved on together. It was an easy, relaxing rhythm. And watching the way she relaxed upon his reassurance and the way she would slowly move her gaze and smile to herself made something in him feel so fucking _happy_. Because _she_ was happy. Not on edge, or just waiting for the next incident to come around.

She was just happy.

Work was the same old. He mixed drinks, flirted with girls, embarrassed himself in front of girls, burned himself on steamed milk and had some douchebag accuse him of being a douchebag because he wore his sunglasses inside. It was chill, it was fun, it made money. He really didn’t have any complaints.

When 11AM started closing in though, he was starting to get anxious. Rose hadn’t texted, she still wasn’t here, and Dave was almost off shift. She’d never missed an afternoon with him before now. As stupid as he figured it was, he found himself a bit worried about her.

He hadn’t seen her since last night, as usual. She left before six the night before and slept in past six this morning. He tried to remember if he had seen her shoes, her purse, before he left this morning. But nothing was coming to mind.

He couldn’t text her while he was on shift. He worried his bottom lip while his eyes stared down the clock. Lunch rush was looming closer. Thankfully he never had to work it, which was good because it looked like fucking hell to do.

The hour switched over and Dave glided his way around back, hanging up his visor and pulling his bag down from the hook. His hand dived into his pocket, barely set up to walk before he was already texting.

 

DAVE STRIDER [11:00 AM]: you playing hookie  
DAVE STRIDER [11:00 AM]: hooky????  
DAVE STRIDER [11:01 AM]: hockey  
DAVE STRIDER [11:01 AM]: earth to mr gretzky  
DAVE STRIDER [11:02 AM]: no seriously where are you  
DAVE STRIDER [11:03 AM]: i know you dont have class today rose its wednesday   
DAVE STRIDER [11:03 AM]: you cant fool me give it up this is the police  
DAVE STRIDER [11:04 AM]: come on at least answer so i know youre alive  
ROSE LALONDE [11:04 AM]: She’s still asleep.  
DAVE STRIDER [11:05 AM]: oh shit an alternate personality  
DAVE STRIDER [11:05 AM]: hello not rose how are you  
ROSE LALONDE [11:06 AM]: Wow, you’re really annoying!! Congrats!!  
ROSE LALONDE [11:06 AM]: Just stop texting her okay?? She’ll get back to you when she’s awake.  
DAVE STRIDER [11:07 AM]: ok so who is this then  
DAVE STRIDER [11:07 AM]: theres no way jade is back already  
ROSE LALONDE [11:08 AM]: I’m nobody. I was just on my way out the door when I heard her purse buzzing like a goddamn vibrator. Thought I could get a second round with it, hahahaha.  
DAVE STRIDER [11:09 AM]: ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

 

What the hell? Did Rose spend the night with someone? That... Was sort of discouraging. An uncomfortable weight sunk in his stomach and he found it suddenly impossible to hold up the usual snarky grin he wore when him and Rose texted.

 

DAVE STRIDER [11:11 AM]: well  
DAVE STRIDER [11:11 AM]: just tell her i missed her today i guess??   
ROSE LALONDE [11:12 AM]: Yeah, sure. Have fun doing whatever.   
DAVE STRIDER [11:13 AM]: yeah ok

 

Except it wasn’t fun in the slightest. He sunk into his usual seat at their usual table, opening his laptop and opening dunkasssquirrel.docx. He stared at his dialogue, all his scene changes. But his throat felt dry and his chest felt uncomfortably strained and he had hit a complete wall.

“Is anyone sitting here?”

He looked up hearing the voice, a sharp exhale escaping him. Some short girl with bright green eyes and chopped off black hair had a hand draped over the other chair. He tried to smile, giving his head a shake.

“Nah, go ahead.”

The girl set down her stuff and joined him, but didn’t say a word to him. If anything it just broke his concentration more. Not only did he not know where to put his ideas, he didn’t know where to put his thoughts. They were incoherent and jumbled and all he knew was _it hurts, something hurts, this isn’t right, I don’t like this_ but not a single reason behind any of it.

 

It hadn’t even been an hour before he was packing up his stuff. He felt lost and bitter and angry. He didn’t thank the woman who opened the door for him. Driving home he missed a stop sign, waking him from that mood for only a couple minutes before he was back to spacing out. 

He pulled into the usual parking spot. He pulled his bag from the passenger seat in the same practiced rhythm. Going inside he passed some stringy-haired blonde with blue eyes and weirdly long fingers. He avoided eye contact. 

When he got into the apartment, Rose was standing in the kitchen in a shirt too big for her that hung down past her butt. She was fiddling with the Tassimo, her hair an absolute mess. She really did just have a one night stand with someone, didn’t she? Great. Fun. Cool.

“Morning,” he greeted, tossing his keys aside. He pulled his bag off his shoulder, leaving it propped up against the wall by her shoes.

“Oh,” she answered, a bit of shock in her voice as she looked back at him. Her face was bright and flushed, but she seemed so pleased you could see the smile just in her eyes. He didn’t even want to take a photo of her right now. “Good morning! I wasn’t expecting you back. I thought you’d be writing like usual.”

“Yeah well,” he started, snagging an apple from the fruit bowl and shoving it in his mouth. Hopefully it would prevent him from saying something stupid. “It was kind of lonely without you.”

The expression on Rose’s face made it clear that she thought she had just gotten away with something. That tiny sly grin and that small amount of tooth she showed for it. He could see the lipstick smeared down her chin and over her jaw. Blue kiss marks that he was certain would be down along her neck, too.

“So your bar doesn’t have a rule about bringing home customers?"

The look on her face subsided, but she still had a smug air arou d her. “As long as they’re coherent, they don’t really care.”

“Cool.”

Idly he tossed around his snack, thumbing at his lips where they were slick with the juice. He felt so angry. Angry that she’d skipped out on him, angry that she didn’t at least call, angry that she was so fucking unapologetic. But why the hell should she be apologetic? At what point did he ever inform her that he may or may not be developing some sort of romantic feelings? Of course he never told her, because he wasn’t even _sure_ yet.

Besides, what was he? A fucking middle schooler? He didn’t have a crush. If he wanted to be with her he’d ask her out on a date like an adult. He hadn’t done that yet, so he had absolutely no right to decide who she was allowed to sleep with. And hell, even if she was sleeping with people, that doesn’t mean she would be unable to go on a date. Maybe she just liked sex? He certainly wasn’t giving her any, so was it really out of line to let her have it when she wanted until he was in a position to do it?

So it was decided. He had nothing to be worried about. He was still slightly disappointed that he missed writing with her since spending time with her was about the best thing he did every day. There was nothing wrong with that. That was a perfectly valid feeling of disappointed with no entitled undertones about it. Good and fine.

He put the thought to bed and loosened up, easing a smile and sliding his way onto the kitchen counter next to Rose while she got started on lunch.

“So how was it, anyway?”

Rose ended up smirking, almost snickering to herself. As much as it made his heart sink he was still happy to see it.

“Lovely, actually. After so many weeks in a dry spell it was a dream come true. I think I’ve been spoiled having Jade around.”

Woah woah. Rose and Jade... Slept together? He didn’t get a vibe like that from Jade at all when he met her. He hesitated to ask for verification- it really wasn’t his business. If he asked now it might just look like he wanted to fantasize about them or something.

“She was feisty,” Rose continued, turning over a grilled cheese. “A messy blonde in blue jeans with an affinity for biting."

“Sounds right up your alley,” he offered, forcing up a smirk himself while he stared blankly at the empty kitchen table. Honestly he didn’t have a single fucking clue what sounded “right up Rose’s alley.” He’d be lying to himself if he said he’d never imagined her in a more sensual light- pale and flushed and topless, sheets draped over her lap and legs, stroking his face, nails biting in his back- yeah he’d thought about that. But that was his imagination. There wasn’t a doubt in his mind that if he’d ever saw her naked she wouldn’t already have a strap-on in hand and an eyebrow cocked.

“Too bad she left before I was awake,” she added, her jaw widening with a yawn. “Plate, please.”

With a frown he hopped off the counter, retrieving a plate from the cupboard and holding it out for her. After she cut the sandwich in half with her spatula she dropped the two halves onto his plate, quickly starting to make a second one.

“Yeah she uh. Said that you were still asleep when she texted me.”

Rose stalled for a minute, keeping her back to him while he hopped back up on the counter. Nope, he was just going to sit with her until she was ready to sit somewhere else.

“I didn’t realize she did.”

He nodded, taking a bite from the sandwich and exhaling around it to try and cool it off. “Yeah. I was texting you to found out where you were. She answered.”

Somehow that smug confident air she was showing earlier seemed to fade off. There was a distinct frown on her face while she prodded at the frying pan.

“Sorry,” she said quietly, taking a moment with her head ducked before laughing a clearly forced laugh. “I didn’t realize. I hope you weren’t worried.”

“Nah,” he lied, giving her a suspicious eye over. What was she thinking? “I figured you had something going on.”

Rose was quiet for the rest of the afternoon. It was obvious she was up to something. She kept spacing out, surprised to find that Dave was talking to her. It was a red flag and Dave knew he should be trying to weasel his way in- figure out what her problem was and make sure it wasn’t more paranoid plotting or overthinking.

But he never said a word. Something in his mind told him it was fine, it was no big deal, let Rose figure something out for herself for once instead of babysitting her. Just this one time, let her deal with it. It could be a test. He said whatever he could to rationalize it, carefully avoiding the fact that he just didn’t want to hear about her being with someone else.

So he let her continue. Afternoon turned into night time. Rose made dinner then started work on her homework. In the morning she went to class and Dave went to work. He wrote alone again. This time he didn’t bother texting her. He was almost scared of hearing the same news he heard yesterday. It was the absolute last thing he wanted. 

He tried to waste as much time as he could before he went home. Anything to avoid a repeat of yesterday. He didn’t want to see Rose covered in lipstick marks or see bruises on her neck. Hedidn’t blame her for looking like that, not in the slightest, but he didn’t want to witness it. Just because... Because why? Just because he was jealous? Was he jealous?

Lunch rush had ended and aside from one other patron and the café was empty. Even his coworkers had started to slack off, tossing around the morning’s muffins and squatting to the floor for a break from standing. He had to smirk. What a bunch of kids.

He looked down at his laptop when it started ringing, the familiar drops and swoops of Skype’s ringer coming through his earbuds as his music faded off. His brother was seriously calling him? Not like he bothered in the past month. What was so urgent _now_?

He answered with video enabled, tilting his screen to avoid the blowout from the café shop window behind him. As soon as the call loaded and he saw the tips of Bro’s shoes while he leaned all the way back in his desk chair, he found himself relaxing. Man, he almost missed his brother.

“If you’re looking for money, I swear to God,” he teased, trying to look casual to the other person in the shop while he essentially talked to himself. He propped his head up in one of his hands, a finger slipping into his mouth so he could bite at the nail.

“Love you too, you little prick.”

They shared a laugh. Dave just stared at him, comfortable and relaxed seeing his face. Usually contact with Bro made his anxiety worse. But after all this time, it seemed to be exactly what he needed.

“You haven’t called once, man, what the fuck. What’s been going on? Figured you had to be alive if there ain’t been cops knockin’ the door down.” Bro was idly tossing around what looked like a peach. Cal was behind him on the futon, leaning over the armrest and staring directly into the camera. That was unnerving.

“Nothing’s been going on.” Dave shrugged, taking a glance around the still-empty room. Damn, he was oddly paranoid. “I found an apartment and I’ve been working.”

“I thought you were going to school. You could a’ worked here.”

“I am going to school, I just don’t start until the fall. I wanted a head start on tuition and shit. I know I could have worked in Houston but I didn’t want to. I need to branch out a little bit, man. Cut me some slack.”

“You don’t need slack,” Bro refuted, bringing his feet off the desk and leaning forward. “You need good comp’ny. You living with anyone or what?”

“Yeah,” he answered simply, his collar suddenly tight. Did he really want to tell Bro about Rose? It’s not like Bro hadn’t already proven himself to be the type to constantly mock any and all people Dave ever talked to for being love interests. So what if he hadn’t dated many people before and hadn’t had sex yet? He was happy.

“Who is it? Best not be some sugar daddy from Craigslist."

God damn it.

“It’s a girl, Bro. Her name is Rose she’s doing a double major in fiction and psychology.”

“Psychology? Isn’t that what all dumb girls take because they think it’s a bird course and they want to be all deep about how the human mind works?”

“Your sexism is as subtle as ever, Big Man.”

“I’m not sexist Little Man I just think it’s funny that all the same types of people take psychology. I’m the king of feminism and you know it.”

“Not helping your case.”

Man, talking to Bro was easy. He never had to think over anything Bro said or worry how he was coming across. There was no fretting over reputation or looking cool. That all ended when Dave was 15 and thank God it did. They had had a huge long talk about their family and suddenly he didn’t feel distant anymore. Bro stopped being that guy Dave lived with and started being his brother. 

“So where is she?” Bro said suddenly, leaning forward in his seat and starting to rifle through papers on his desk.

“Where’s who?”

“The girl you’re living with. What, am I not allowed to meet her? Am I going to jeopardize your chances or something? Yeah, I could see that. I’m pretty popular with girls. Too bad for them.”

Dave rolled his eyes.

“She’s probably back at the apartment getting ready for work. She’s a bartender.”

“Huh,” he responded, pausing in his movements before nodding to himself. “Cool. She ever get drunk around the house?”

Dave actually had to consider that for a minute. “Not really, honestly. Like she has a martini once in awhile while she does her homework or writes but I actually haven’t seen her noticeably drunk yet.”

Bro snickered to himself, “Yet.”

For whatever reason Dave felt himself flush, turning his head away from the camera to hide it. “Well yeah, she was excited about forcing me to drink underage so I’m sure it’ll happen eventually. There’s just been a lot going on first to deal with.”

“A lot going on?” Figures Bro would snag onto that hook line and sinker. “What kind of a lot?”

“None of your business,” Dave insisted, quieting his voice when another customer came in. “She’s just got personal stuff and I’m helping her with it because I’m a good pal.”

“Don’t go falling for her,” Bro warned. “That shit always happens when you’re part of someone’s growth.”

Dave hesitated to respond. He wasn’t falling for Rose. And even if he was what would be so bad about that? She was intelligent and independent and funny and they got along great. What difference would it make?

“I’m not going to fall for her,” he answered hesitantly. Bro seemed to hear the waver in his tone, a slight smirk crossing his lips.

“Sure thing, Kiddo.”

Dave managed to steer his brother off the Rose topic for awhile, getting him to listen about work and school for awhile. Told him how his screenplay was coming along, that he was already looking at producers to arrange meetings. Sure, it meant a roadtrip to LA but that actually didn’t sound too bad. Especially if he somehow managed to convince Rose to come with him. That might actually be really fun.

“So am I ever going to meet her?” He asked eventually, suddenly positioning Cal in his lap after he came out of nowhere. God fucking damn it. “Think I should know your girlfriend before I’m giving you away at the wedding.”

Dave pinched the bridge of his nose, a weak laugh escaping him.

“That is so not how weddings work. If anything you’d be giving her away.” Did Rose even have a father figure? She sure never mentioned one. She mentioned not having male influences, so it was possible she didn’t. “But okay, fine, if we ever start dating I promise you can meet her. I’ll even bring her down to visit. Will that satisfy you?”

“Sure will, Little Bro.” If that grin on his face was any indication, he wasn’t lying, either. “I gotta get back to work alright. But holy shit, fucking call me sometime don’t be such an anti-social little asshole. I wanna know what’s going on with you alright?”

He offered up an apologetic smile, carefully scratching behind his ear. “Yeah, alright.”

“I love you, Kid. Bad enough you up and left me alone you don’t gotta leave me in the dust too.”

“I love you too, but holy shit go easy on the guilt tripping, will you. You’re a grown ass man. Shouldn’t you just be happy you have a bedroom to bring drunk twinks back to instead of a couch?”

That made Bro laugh, wagging a finger at his webcam.

“Okay A, twinks love the “you aren’t important enough for the bed” type of abuse, are you fucking serious? And B, have you ever seriously seen me with a twink? Like honestly, think about this for a minute. When have I ever brought home a twink.”

Dave’s head fell back as he started laughing, bringing up his knee against his chest. “Dude, I barely fucking know what that word _means_ how the hell should I know if I’ve seen you with one.”

Bro’s response was nothing besides a breathy “fucking straight people.” It made Dave laugh again, hiding behind his hand bashfully. So maybe he missed Bro a little bit.

“Alright, I’m going. Good luck with your girlfriend, good luck in school. Don’t do drugs on weekdays.”

With a shake of his head Dave gave a wave, hanging up before this got more sentimental. Fuck, his glasses were already foggy. Bastard.

He packed up his stuff after finishing the last scene he was writing. He felt refreshed and energized after talking with his brother. He felt a lot more comfortable, he wasn’t focused on Rose, or worrying about her getting snatched up. After all, if she did, she did, if she didn’t, she didn’t. It made no difference to him at all.

He got himself settled in his car, putting on the air conditioning before grabbing out his phone.

 

DAVE STRIDER [04:33 PM] dont start dinner im treating you

 

At least Rose would always appreciate ironically gifted fast food meals.

 

DAVE STRIDER [04:34 PM] did you stay the night with someone again btw   
DAVE STRIDER [04:34 PM] because i can bring them something too

 

He only had the patience to wait a minute before he was tossing his phone into the passenger seat with his bag, pulling away from the curb and making his way back home. He made sure to grab Burger King on the way as promised.

He carried the bag in his mouth while he headed upstairs and down the hallway, hands preoccupied with trying to get out his apartment key. God forbid he just put it on the damn keyring already. Just as he was approaching the door he could feel his fingers brush against it.

Right as he happened to hear a high pitched, desperate moan coming from behind the door.

He completely stiffened as he slowly lifted his head, eyes wide in shock. It didn’t stop there, either. Whoever it was continued, gasping and heaving and just _squealing_. That... Wasn’t Rose, was it? Did she seriously bring home someone _else_? And in the middle of the day, no less?

Now he found himself at an impasse. He could barge in- he did fucking live there, after all. But what was he about to walk in on, exactly? Was it really something he even _wanted_ to walk in on? He could try and pretend that he didn’t hear it and it was an accident that he barged in. Yeah, that would work fine.

Moving his key from his bag to his other hand, he next searched out his headphones where they were still attached to his laptop. He pulled the earbuds out one after the other, slipping them into his ears. Here goes nothing. 

He slowly unlocked the door and turned the handle. Cautiously he pushed the door open, instantly trying to talk around the Burger King bag to make his introduction seem all the more real.

“Did I say I was bringing dinner, or what?”

He opened his eyes and sure enough, there it was. One girl laying on her back and a blanket draped over her waist, breasts exposed, nipples hard and red where they were apparently getting pretty used, and just a look of absolute shock painted across her face. Rose’s head appeared from under the blanket, and as she sat up it fell down her shoulders and pooled around her hips. Fuck, she was shirtless, too. And when she looked over her shoulder, she sloppily licked her lips clean.

Dave didn’t even notice the bag of food falling to the floor as he started gaping.

“Oh, Dave,” she started. The girl below her was quick to hide behind her hand, her other arm draping over her chest. Rose was significantly less affected, almost smirking to herself as she watched Dave’s reaction. “Have you met Adriana? She’s in my Worldbuilding class.”

What the _hell_?

“Jesus Christ, I’m sorry,” he said quickly, slapping a hand over his eyes (sunglasses) and turning to the side. Rose may not have cared, but her partner sure did. “I’m not looking, I am leaving the room, you ladies enjoy your evening.”

He started scurrying for his bedroom, only stopping when he realized he left his food behind. Eyes still covered he backed up to retrieve it, taking off all over again once it was secure in his hand.

Something was definitely going on here. A big, huge, colossal _something_. Rose knew he’d be back around five. That’s always when they finished. Why the hell wouldn’t she have called? And why the hell would she start all of this in the _living room_.

He wanted to go straight for the clear answer- she was trying to make him jealous. But why? What purpose did it serve? Was he just getting cocky after his brother’s teasing?

That had to be it. Rose wouldn’t make him jealous. She probably just lost track of time.

He had to sigh as he tossed his food onto his desk, dropping his bag in the corner and flopping down into bed. That was too much bullshit for one day. Rose going to work was going to be a nice needed break.

If he was even going to be able to turn off his thoughts long enough to enjoy it.


	13. Chapter 13

Convincing a bunch of straight women that they needed to experiment to _truly feel happy_ was fucking exhausting. Not to mention manipulative and just evil in general. Rose was playing people’s insecurities like her personal harp. And the worst of it was, it wasn’t even _working_.

Adriana, Victoria, Nellie, Phoebe- all of them came home with her, all of them had sex with her, and as planned, Dave knew about all of it.

So why the hell hadn’t his demeanor changed?

That’s how it worked, didn’t it? Wasn’t that the exact trope since the dawn of time? That any straight man would instantly be attracted to a situation that involved two women having sex? He should be walking through the door seeing that scene and getting hard as a rock, not politely apologizing and making himself scarce.

This was supposed to make him attracted to her. Force him to feel something for her similar to what she had started feeling for him after he’d actually given her an impartial opinion of her book. But he was acting the same way he always was. Was he just good at hiding it? Surely he had to be beating off thinking about it at _some_ point in his day. But just thinking it wasn’t satisfying. She wanted to know it was happening. She wanted to have that power over him based on more than just assumptions.

Her assuming days were over, after all.

Her sleeping around days ended just as abruptly. It was her Friday off and when Dave got home from writing, he actually did a double take when he saw her sprawled out on the couch watching television by herself.

He was pretty classy when he actually vocalized it, though, tossing down a take-out bag on the coffee table and lifting his shoulder bag to put on the floor.

“Having a night in, eh? Guess we all need a break from being suave and sexy once in awhile."

Rose felt like a fucking idiot for grinning at that. Boy did she feel like an idiot. But fuck, Dave was just _really_ cute. He took himself so seriously but at the same time he didn’t at all and it was just such a complicated charm and she _fell_ for it so pathetically. This felt no different than crushing on the Backstreet Boys when she was eight.

“Even us ladies can get overworked,” she responded, sitting up properly on the couch. “I see you brought dinner again.”

His expression faltered as he forced out a laugh. “Actually I. Only got food for me this time. I just assumed you’d be with someone again.” There was something apologetic in the way his mouth flattened and almost hung down at the corners. He ducked his head, scratched at his scalp. He actually felt bad, didn’t he?

But Rose did, too. Her heart sunk and she had to play up a smile as she lifted her knees to her chest. “That’s to be expected,” she reassured him, toes wiggling against the couch cushion. “Not to worry, I can cook for myself.”

There was a long silence while she stared forward. Dave made some sort of odd frustrated exhale noise before he slapped his thighs. Rose lifted her head when she heard his keys start jingling.

“No, fuck that, I’ve been trying to treat you to dinner all week. If this is your day off from mingling I’m taking it for myself.”

Stupidly enough, Rose was shocked by the outburst. She threw her gaze over to him, worried her lip, probably even flushed a bit.

“You’re not... Angry that I’ve been bringing girls home, are you?”

“What?”

It was times like these where she really wished she could see his eyes instead of being forced to look at her own pathetic expression in the reflection of his sunglasses. She wanted to know what he was thinking, how he was feeling. Not her own weakness.

“I mean,” she tried, voice wavering as she turned away. “You don’t think I’m some floozy skank.”

It would certainly explain why he never reacted the way she expected him to.

After a pause Dave headed over, taking a seat next to her on the couch and lazily slinging an arm around behind her along the back of it.

“Okay A, thank you for asking me about this instead of assuming about it. I’m really fucking proud of you for that.”

Now she was flushing all over again, the fucking asshole. She kept her eyes off of him, still not willing to look at her reflection. Even the possibility of him finding her gross made her feel gross. That this was all a mistake and she had officially ruined any and all chances she might have had.

“B,” he continued, a hand suddenly giving her shoulder a squeeze. The other one dove between where her legs were hoisted up and her stomach, and her eyes widened when she felt the way his fingers brushed over her sides. She was squirming in an instant, bursting into laughter as he tickled her. “Of course I don’t fucking think you’re a skank, are you serious? Ain’t nothing wrong with a little bump and grind and that rule applies to girls, too.”

She had to heave for a breath when he let go of her, sliding hands to her eyes to catch tears from her laughing. “So what,” she asked, choking back a sob. Her emotions were swirling and it wasn’t a nice feeling. “It just didn’t bug you at all?”

“Well sure, I’d have liked a little notice so I didn’t have to deal with awkwardly shuffling through the room, but no, I don’t really care. It’s your life you can spend it how you want.”

Rose felt the blush bloom on her cheeks as she ducked her head shyly, lifting her hand to wipe her nose.

“I meant... Like. _Bothered_ you.”

“Oh.”

He sat back slightly and cleared his throat, his face going red while he turned it away. It made her smirk, but she kept the teasing to herself.

“Jesus dick, Rose, you can’t just ask a dude about his boners. I mean. Sure okay yeah, but what sexual situation _doesn’t_ make a dude think? Do you mean specifically because it was _you_ or what?”

Yes.

“No, I mean specifically because it was always women.”

That earned her a chuckle. Dave seemed to be getting back to his comfort zone after that bombshell.

“In that case, no, it didn’t _bother_ me. I got the whole sexualizing sexuality thing out of my system pretty young considering my brother’s gay. Don’t even want to think about the slaps to the back of the head I got for looking at gay women like that.”

Shit. Shit damn shit. Dave was actually a good fucking person on top of everything else. Now she felt like a terrible, terrible human being. Her stomach churned and unwillingly she broke out into a grin. With closed eyes she slumped against him, breathing a sigh of relief.

“So much time wasted,” she breathed, feeling so, so safe when his arm closed around her shoulder.

“What?”

“Nothing,” she lied, carefully moving an arm up across to wrap around his chest. “You are just. You know. I’m. I’m glad that we met. And that you’re here.”

Her pride was pushing at her throat as she tried to swallow it down. It made her eyes moist and her shoulders tremble. Opening up like this was still foreign, as much as she wanted to do it for him. And she really, _really_ wanted to do it for him. She wanted him to know her, as hard as it was to let him.

She felt her heart pound when his hand slid to cover hers. It was warm and calloused and it encircled hers like a damn giant. She felt like she was on fire already without that addition.

Dave slouched in his seat, propped his feet up on the coffee table and pulled her so close she had to roll slightly onto her side. A deep inhale brought in his scent, took in his warmth and brought her closer. She’d been with men and women alike and had yet to feel this safe and secure with any of them. Dave barely did anything besides listen and get her to speak. And yet somehow that meant the world.

“I’m glad that I met you, too, Rose,” he answered quietly. She tried to look up at him but his face was safely tucked away behind her. That asshole. “And not just because you put a roof over my head, either. You’re just. An outstanding woman. You’re strong and brave and you face even the toughest challenges with determination and optimism. I’m really glad we met. I’m glad I had the chance to meet someone like you. Even if you called me Derek the first time we spoke.”

She had to laugh hearing that. She fucking knew that was going to stick with him. It always did.

“I only did that to get your attention,” she admitted, carefully rubbing his chest with her thumb. She could feel his heartbeat under her hand and was so comforted to know it was just as rough as hers was.

“It worked, holy shit,” he answered, fucking exasperated as he slouched even further. For a moment she panicked, worried that he was going to get up and she’d have to let go of him, but he didn’t move. “Are you kidding me? That’s been on my mind since it fucking happened. I haveliterally not stopped thinking about it. I have been sitting here like a moronic asshole, losing sleep at night hugging my lame Gurren Lagann body pillow sucking my thumb and crying because I just did not get how you could forget my name.”

Rose covered her mouth when she heard herself snort, smiling widely behind her hand and putting all her focus into trying not to laugh. She could give him the satisfaction of her laughter, but she was already putting a lot out for _one_ afternoon.

“So what happened to going for dinner?” She asked once his tirade was over, not moving a muscle as she stayed pressed against him.

“That should still definitely happen. And I’ll make sure not to compliment your appearance this time. Just give you a cool thumbs up and take your arm and screw the rest.”

His tone said “this is a joke” but somehow she knew he was serious. She didn’t feel mocked or ridiculous for having a trigger that simple. She just knew that hey, he understood, that he only had the best intentions but he still understood and that he wasn’t going to push it until she was ready for it.

“You can compliment me a little,” she responded, playing up a snooty tone to counter his. “Just. Don’t get too intense with it.”

“You got it, dude.”

Dave surprisingly enough kept his promise. Rose left her room in a skirt and blouse with a decorated clutch, and his comment didn’t string past a quick and easy “lookin’ good” as he held out an arm to sling around the small of her back. It was easy to lean into his touch and to feel comfortable standing next to him.

He left off some of the pressure just by taking them to Taco Bell, settling down at a table and opening up a candle flame app on his iPhone to rest between them on the table. The gesture made her laugh, but she appreciated it all the same. He was such an idiot, such a dork, a sucker for ironic affection. He was like a Prince- the kind that didn’t come out of the frog form and that most Princesses would try and turn back into a human. Rose however was more than happy with how he was. Even as hot sauce dripped out of his burrito and down onto his shirt.

“So how has the screenplay been coming along in my absence?” Rose asked, slipping her straw between her lips. Dave clenched his jaw in a ‘yeah about that’ motion, lifting a hand to scratch his scalp.

“Honestly I’ve. Been doing a pretty shitty job without you. Guess you motivate me more than I realized. Don’t get me wrong here I am all for you having the freedom to do whatever you want but if you could find it in your heart to come back sometime soon, that would be great.”

She couldn’t help the grin on her face. Her head ducked as she sat back, fiddling with her sleeves. “I’d love to join you. I haven’t written at all this past week. We can try motivating each other.”

Dave lifted his head hearing that. She still couldn’t see his damn eyes, but there was something in the way his mouth was just slightly open that let her imagine for herself how he was looking up at her. That nervous hopefulness that she was all too familiar with- the same hesitance that she had felt looking at him time and time again. The feeling of wanting something so much but still being unsure.

He tousled his hair a bit with the shake of his head, quickly looking downward and toying with the trash from his meal. “Sounds good.”

She stalled- she had to stall, didn’t she? Straight out asking so soon would just make him feel trapped and confronted and that’s not how she wanted to do this. That’s not how she wanted to anything. She took a few seconds to breathe as he went silent, eventually sitting forward.

“Dave I--”

She was interrupted by the sound of her text chime. Dave wasn’t even looking up despite her saying his name. She exhaled slowly and sat back, reaching into her purse to pull out her Blackberry.

 

JADE HARLEY [06:32 PM]: grandpas in the hospital again. doesnt look like hes going to be released this time  
JADE HARLEY [06:32 PM]: i miss you a lot!! and i guess im kind of wishing you were still just down the hall to cry on  
JADE HARLEY [06:33 PM]: how is dave??  
ROSE LALONDE [06:33 PM]: Sitting across from me, actually. Sulking about something. I’m not really sure what’s going on with him.  
JADE HARLEY [06:34 PM]: haha oops sorry for interrupting ill let you get back to your date ;D  
ROSE LALONDE [06:35 PM]: Tradition would prompt me to refute that claim but.   
ROSE LALONDE [06:35 PM]: I’m not really sure of anything right now.  
ROSE LALONDE [06:36 PM]: I miss you, too, Jade. I know you’ll make it through this.   
ROSE LALONDE [06:36 PM]: You are the strongest person I have ever known.  
JADE HARLEY [06:38 PM]: <333333!!!!!!!!

 

She couldn’t help the smile even as her eyes were welling up. She hadn’t heard from Jade in forever, and now that’s the news. She was both relieved and disappointed.

“Everything alright?” Dave asked, seemingly over his episode. Rose was surprised to hear his voice, but offered a polite smile regardless.

“It’s just Jade. She says her grandfather is back in the hospital.”

He nodded, taking a long few gulps from his drink until the ice was all that was left. “Right, I remember her saying something about that when I talked to her. Hard to believe that was over a month ago now.”

Had it really been that long? It felt impossible to believe. Dave wasn’t a stranger- she knew that fine. But there was still a distinct unknowingness that she found herself surrounded in when he was around. Like their story was still being written, and something huge was still around the corner. She always assumed that was the writer in her forcing its way through. But maybe it wasn’t so farfetched of a feeling? Only time would tell.

It still felt like their friendship was young. And being almost half way through the summer already made it pretty apparent that Dave was going to be far more than a temporary summer roommate after all.

“Ready to go back?” He said eventually, starting to get up from his seat. He already snatched his iPhone up from the table. Rose was taken aback. She didn’t realize she had stayed silent in thought as long as she had.

“Of course,” she replied, smiling politely and getting up to her feet. Dave took the tray in one

hand, tossing out the trash before offering her an arm.

Rose snickered behind her hand, weaving her arm through his so they had locked their elbows together. What a colossal fucking goofball. He opened the restaurant door for her and he opened the passenger door for her. She was getting spoiled. And as stupid of a gesture as it was, she wasn’t complaining.

Once they were settled and driving, Rose caught herself with a steady gaze on everything outside. Dave was humming along to some song on the radio, not even disturbing her. She wasn’t even really thinking about anything- just spacing out. That was no way to end an evening.

“Thank you,” she finally said, sitting back in her seat and glancing over at him. He had a bit of a smile as he turned his gaze away, trying to feign a shoulder check.

“Don’t mention it. You’re well worth a fast food dinner, Rose. May not feel like it but I promise you are.”

That sentiment definitely was nice. She leaned her head back while she watched him, smiling herself and closing her eyes. “I meant for everything. For putting up with me and helping me grow and just being so supportive. Part of me still doesn’t understand how it’s possible that you care so much but at the very least I’m not sitting here doubting it anymore. I know you do. I know you aren’t just screwing around.”

He flashed her a quick glance but otherwise kept his eyes forward. She’d never seen him that attentive to his driving before now. Was she really making him that nervous?

“I’m glad you can see that now. I can’t imagine how crummy of a feeling it must be to think everyone’s just out to hurt you. Must get lonely.”

That hit close to home and Rose had to turn away. She dropped her gaze to her lap with a quiet sigh. It was lonely. It was insanely fucking lonely. But whenever she tried to express how lonely it was people just blamed her. Reminded her it was her own damn fault for being so skeptical all the time. And that didn’t make it any better.

“Why do you think I’d sleep around if not because I needed some time with someone?”

It was supposed to be a joke but Dave just shrugged. “Makes sense to me.”

Cue another turn away of his head and Rose had to sit forward slightly to try and take a glance at his face.

“Dave did that situation really not bother you in the slightest?”

“Nope,” he said quickly, checking his mirrors. “I told you, I’m not into the whole hot lesbians xxx thing.”

“I got that,” she replied, casually hiking up her skirt to scratch at her thigh. “I mean in a more general sense.” Or a more specific one. Specifically her involvement.

“Why are we talking about this?”

She forced herself not to snicker, eying him over. He wasn’t _trembling_ was he? “Is it not normal to be curious about your friend’s sex drive? Jade and I had these discussions all the time.”

His grip on the steering wheel seemed loose. As if his palms were clamming up. Damn she really was crossing a line.

“Yeah well... You were sleeping with Jade and I’m not sleeping with _anyone_.” He paused before he was back to stammering. “Not that there’s anything wrong with sleeping with whoever; I don’t care about that. It’s just not my thing.”

Rose sat forward in her seat even further, desperately trying to sneak a peak of his face.

“Then... When’s the last time you did it?”

“Did what,” he mumbled, face red to the tips of his ears. For a moment Rose found herself worried- what if it was recently? If he honored a sexual relationship and had one recently that might mean she was fucked.

“Slept with someone,” she answered, amazed that she was actually humoring his fake ignorance. “When is the last time you inserted your parts into someone else’s parts.”

“Jesus dick, Rose. What does that matter?"

“I’m only curious."

“Never.”

Rose blinked, lips pursing.

“What?”

“I’ve never done it! My only girlfriend cheated on me before we even had a chance. Sorry I don’t have some colorful history like you. That’s the big secret.”

“Dave!!”

He was rolling down his window, and he pulled his hands off the steering wheel to practically throw his entire upper body out of it. Rose panicked and tried to grab the wheel, frantically attempting to watch the road while also making sure he didn’t fucking jump out.

Despite everything, despite her absolute _terror_ and embarrassment and worry, she started laughing. She couldn’t help it, he was just so fucking _ridiculously_ dramatic. He threw both of his arms in the air and with a loud exhale, he screamed.

_“DAVE STRIDER IS A VIRGIN!!!”_

“Would you get back in the car! You’re going to get us killed!”

He obediently sat back down, flopping into his seat and grabbing onto the steering wheel. They started to speed up where he had slowed down from taking his foot off the pedal, and Rose frantically tried to adjust her bangs. Laughter was still bubbling up, and she desperately tried to swallow it down.

“Are you fucking insane?” She snapped, heaving for breath. Her heart was pounding. Dave had some fake pout on his face, lifting up an exasperated hand.

“Uh, no? I _just fucking said_ that I was a virgin how could I be fucking insane."

Oh, that was bad. That was so terribly horrible. And Rose laughed all over again. There were tears in her eyes and she wanted to sob just over how fucking awful this was.

“Just get me home in one piece, alright, Strider.”

Finally he offered a simple smirk, his usual, complete with a quick glance in her direction. “I suppose I can do that for you. If only because you can now blackmail me until the end of time.”

“Wow, I can, can’t I? That’s amazing. But what should be my first demand?"

“Personally I’d go with free foot massages, but that’s just me.”

 

Back at the building Dave rushed to get her door open before she could get to it. She rolled her eyes and gave him a look of pure “are you fucking serious” but said a calm and reserved thank you never the less.

Getting into the building she stalled, waving a hand at him.

“Hold on, I didn’t get the mail yet today.”

Dave froze in his tracks on the path to the elevator, quickly spinning a 180 and waltzing over to join her.

“I didn’t know we had a mailbox,” he mused, hands in his pockets. He moved to stand next to her, watching while she sorted through keys and opened up the small box.

She pulled out the stack and took a look. It was mostly junk mail and flyers, but from the looks of things there were a couple envelopes to open. The first one she got to was for Dave. It was from some enterprise by the looks of it. A prepaid envelope and a return address that was actually printed right on. What the hell kind of company name was PlushRump? Oh right, that was his brother’s website. The one she had found before she even _met_ Dave.

“Something for you,” she offered, dangling the envelope in front of him. He snatched it up in surprise.

“Oh hey, this is from my brother. I wonder what he’s up to now. I was wondering what he needed my address for. Glad it wasn't a surprise visit.”

Rose had an amused smile, sifting through a couple more fliers until she found one letter addressed to her. Her shoulders slumped as she looked at it, and she had to swallow to try and settle down her nerves.

“It’s from my query agent,” she said quietly, turning toward him. She kept the envelope in hand while she tossed out the rest of the pile, slowly shutting the door of the mail box. “Looks like we have an answer as to whether or not my last book is getting published.”

She looked to Dave with a huge frown, surprised to see the way he had to refocus his attention from reading his own letter. She couldn’t even bring herself to ask what his brother had sent him. Her stomach was swirling and she felt anxious.

She really, really didn’t want to open this letter.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Parts of this chapter may be darker to read than in the past so please don't feel bad for skimming past a few paragraphs if at any point you feel uncomfortable.

Rose seemed to have dropped into some odd panic mode. Dave kept telling her to open the letter, but she just stood there staring at it. He glanced around the room as people wandered past to get to their apartments. Rose still wasn’t budging.

“Do you want to take it upstairs at least?” He suggested, easing one of his hands around her wrist. He half expected her to jolt away from him, but she didn’t. She let him take her arm and as he started walking toward the elevator, she followed.

“It’s going to be another rejection,” she mumbled, eyes still glued to the front of the envelope. “There’s no way they’re interested.”

“You don’t know that,” he refuted, moving his arm around her back to guide her into the apartment. He heard about the manuscript that she had sent off before they met, but he never thought much of it. Here it was now, weighing over her like a storm cloud. “It doesn’t matter what is says, you’ll still be as talented as you were before. Open it.”

She stepped away from his arm, maneuvering her way to the couch where she flopped down on it. Cautiously her nail slipped under the flap, tearing the envelope open at the top. She took in a deep breath as her fingers dove inside, pulling out the letter and unfolding it.

Dave was chewing on his nails again while he watched her expression, his own letter stuffed in his back pocket. It was a bombshell, but it could be dealt with after this.

He had to avert his eyes as Rose’s shoulders started to slump. It really was a rejection, wasn’t it.

“It’s easier to stomach when I don’t hype myself up,” she said eventually, putting the letter to the side. She brought up one of her knees, carefully thumbing the corners of her eyes.

Carefully he moved himself over to sit next to her, freezing ever so slightly when she was instantly rolling over to lay against him. She had opened up so fucking much that he found himself surprised every single day. He just wished it was an all around change as opposed to a gradual one. He still had no fucking idea why she was bringing girls home, especially when she suddenly got so self conscious about it the moment he brought it up.

Despite himself he still comforted her, moving an arm around her shoulders, holding her close to him, clenching his jaw when he felt her shoulders wrack in a sob. She sat up after a little while, makeup smudged, but smiling. A couple sniffles later she was pushing out an apology, seemingly dissolving back into her usual self.

“You gonna be okay?” he asked, keeping his arm behind her on the couch just in case. She nodded as she inhaled, offering a smile.

“I think I’ll be fine,” she answered, sitting forward in a way that let her put a hand on his knee and give it a squeeze. “Once upon a time someone told me that what mattered most was my opinion of my work. And as long as I was proud of what I was putting out, a New York big wig’s opinion could only matter so much.”

She smiled brightly up at him. He actually smiled back, too.

“That guy sounds like an asshole.”

Her eyes were darting back and forth, looking at both of his. She was leaning slightly closer, lips pursed, a hand reaching up toward him. Suddenly he was nervous, heart beginning to pound as he tried to swallow it down. Fuck, Rose was beautiful. Way too beautiful and he couldn’t even tell her but here she was rubbing it in his face anyway. Pale skin and dark lips and makeup that made her eyes huge, even as half of it was pooling on her cheeks.

He knew his face was flushing, he could feel it. The closer she got to him the more he was convinced. When her fingers brushed against his temple, he knew it. She was going to kiss him. He was going to kiss her. It was going to happen. His head ducked slightly in preparation, closing his eyes for that signature sultry look he’d always seen in movies.

He felt the arms of his glasses slide off his face and nearly whimpered. Damn he was nervous but he couldn’t turn back now. He was doing it, Bro. He was gonna make that kiss happen.

“Thank God,” she said suddenly, making him open his eyes again. She was back to sitting in her place, sliding his glasses onto her own face. “I get so sick of looking at these things all the time. Sometimes I just want to see you.”

Fuck. God fucking pissing shit dick damn it. _Seriously?_ Please, please let that have been her just chickening out and not him getting the wrong idea from the get go.

He forced a laugh, awkwardly turning his head away from her. “Yeah well. You wanna trade eyes let’s get that shit started.”

There was a moment of silence as Rose just looked around through his shades, eventually sliding them off and setting them aside.

“So what was your letter?” She asked, putting her feet back on the floor and getting up. “You said it was from your brother?”

Oh right. That thing. He sat forward so he could pull it out of his back pocket, smacking it against his leg idly.

“It’s an itinerary,” he answered, pretty bored with it already if he was honest. “He bought me a trip to Los Angeles so I could go pitch my screenplay to a producer at Universal.”

Rose looked up at him, face painted in shock. She stalled for a moment making weird hand gestures, before she finally sputtered.

“Are you _serious?_ Dave that’s incredible!”

His head sunk between his shoulders. Fuck, praise always made him stupidly shy.

“It’s whatever,” he insisted, trying to adjust his sleeves just to keep his hands busy. “They probably won’t even want the script. It’ll just be a big waste of time."

“Come on now,” she teased, scooting herself closer and wrapping an arm around his. “If I have to stay optimistic, so do you. When do you leave?”

“In a week,” he answered, giving the papers another slap against the couch. “Nice of him to give me enough time to take the time off work, the fucking prick.”

There was a bit more of a pause as Rose’s voice got smaller. “And how long is the trip for?”

Was she... Worried about missing him? Or just wondering how much time she got to enjoy without him. Two very different ends of the same spectrum- shit.

“Three days. Not even enough time to see the damn city. Bro’s always been about being professional though, so it’s really not all that surprising that he’d cut me short like that.”

She seemed happy? That was a relief. At that point she got up from the couch, taking her rejection letter with her.

“I guess we’ll have to work over time so you can get that script finished before you leave. Everyday for the next week I’ll be there. Sound good?”

A week full of doing nothing but spending time with Rose, every single day for hours on end? Yeah, that sounded alright. Doable at least. Sort of an inconvenience if anything really.

Yeah fucking right.

“You’re gonna break some ladies’ hearts making yourself so unavailable,” he teased, enjoying the sly smirk she shot over her shoulder at him. Maybe he really did like her more than he was letting on.

“I’m sure the ladies will be just fine. It’s not as though they had an actual chance with me anyway.”

She almost seemed to scurry away, a hand clamped over her mouth. She took off into her bedroom, shutting the door behind her with an undeniable speed to it. Wait, was that last sentence supposed to mean something?

After a few minutes of her staying locked up, Dave admitted defeat for the evening. He read over the letter he had received about 50 more times. Most specifically the sticky note that Bro had slapped on the front of the pile of papers.

 

_Sorry for not getting a ticket for your girlfriend to join you._   
_Wouldn’t want you to break your focus on the most important day of your life._

_D_

 

“Thanks for the pressure,” he grunted to himself, tossing the letter onto his desk as he made his way around to the front of his turntables. He slipped his headphones around his neck, flipped through samples, accidentally turning on Rose’s from the first time they mixed together. It really was an oddly fun tune for someone like her. But it was nice to hear. It was nice to know she was capable of making something that upbeat and that she wasn’t entirely just doomed to wallow in self pity until the end of time.

Pulling up a new disc he started scratching, involving himself so much that he didn’t even notice Rose leaving her room until she was headed back into it with a martini in hand. She was certainly up to something tonight, wasn’t she? Maybe he could just...

Quietly he slipped his headphones off, tiptoeing his way across the living room and over to her door. He gently placed his hand against the door to steady himself, turning his head and lowering it against the door so his ear was cupped around it.

“So wait,” he heard Rose say, a pause following that might have been where she sipped her drink. “I wasn’t one of the aliens, right?”

“No way!” Responded a voice- a guy’s, that was for sure. Not one Dave recognized. “But you’ve probably been in contact with at least one of them in your current lifespan. Spirits are sort of bonded like that. If we ever hang out I’ll be able to tell for sure. They’ll make marks on your aura like... A reincarnation guestbook.”

At that Rose started laughing- good, whatever the fuck this guy was on about sounded fucking ridiculous and she should be laughing. Who the hell was it, anyway? A brother? An ex? Rose never talked about having other friends, so what gives?

“So did imprint on my aura right away when we spoke, or will it happen after we’ve actually met?”

She was seriously giving in to that shit?

“After,” he answered, sounding as if he had just swallowed a drink of his own. “I’ll even be able to tell the strength of our past relationship based on how big the cut is. With any luck it’ll be the biggest one and we’ll be destined to be together until death.”

Okay, this guy was fucking crazy. Dave couldn’t stop himself from scoffing.

“Hold on a moment,” Rose said, her voice suddenly hushed. “I may or may not be being spied on.”

Shit shit shit.

Dave took off, belly flopping against the couch and snatching up the remote. He flipped it on in an instant, propping his head up casually as he pretended to watch. Rose’s door opened, and she took a few cautious steps into the living room toward where he was lying.

“Wow,” she said, her walk becoming more casual as she moved past him and toward the kitchen. She reached into the fridge, pulling out a tub of yogurt. “I never took you as a Hook kind of guy.”

He forced a laugh, pushing an unenthusiastic fist in the air.

“Bangarang, ha ha.”

She didn’t say anything more as she returned to her room. Dave breathed a sigh of relief, rolling onto his stomach to shove his face into the couch cushion. That was close. Granted he shouldn’t have fucking been eavesdropping in the first place- where did that even come from? Who cared if Rose had other friends. What difference did it make to him? It didn’t make one. It shouldn’t make one. This whole thing was fucking stupid.

Despite coming in halfway through, Dave watched the movie until the end. He shut the television off, moved back to his turntables to turn them off, then made his way into the bathroom for a shower.

He knew that Rose had every right to talk to whoever she wanted. But it still felt sort of shitty that she went to another guy for the evening after he had spent all week busting his ass to spend time with her only for her to be busy with someone else, then took her to dinner to try and make up for it. Part of him was disgusted that he could be thinking and feeling things so disgustingly entitled. 

To the other part, it made perfect sense. Why shouldn’t he be getting some sort of recognition beyond a backhanded “thanks”? He was probably doing way more than any of those girls did, and especially more than mister “oh we are fated blah blah also aliens apparently.”

No, that’s not how it worked. You don’t do nice things so others will think highly of you, you do nice things because they’re nice things to do. That was how it worked. He didn’t deserve jack shit.

Though, that didn’t mean he wasn’t allowed to appreciate himself for his hard work, right?

He stepped into the stream of water, letting himself get soaked under it. He propped a hand against the tile with a deep breath, hanging his head and closing his eyes. He focused himself on the sound of the shower, images flashing as his hand hovered lower. Rose standing with him, looking up at him, hair sopping wet, mascara down her face, shoulders and breasts flushed from the heat and sprinkled in water droplets.

She kissed at his chest, charcoal marks washing away in the water faster than she could leave them. Trailing down over his abdomen and below his hips until she was on her knees. A careful hand gave her hair a stroke, making sure it was out of her eyes and that she was still smiling.

His throat cracked as he disappeared into hers. He could hardly stand watching- black lips pressed up against him, her head cocked to let him into her throat. He wanted to pull her back up- kiss her properly and make her feel just as good and hold her close and keep her warm and carry her to bed but this was just a fantasy.

He thrusted himself into her throat, he turned her around and pressed her against the wall and screwed her from behind. Come shot to the tile in ropes as his shoulders heaved, throat sore from keeping silent and elbow aching from staying locked.

He turned away to rest against the adjacent wall. He stared at the drain as water emptied into it, slowly catching his breath. Eventually he stood up, cleaning himself off and cleaning up his mess. He felt heavy, like something was weighing on him. It didn’t take him long to realize it was guilt.

That was just over all fucked up. A disrespectful, despicable, invasion of privacy. And for what? Because he was jealous she was talking to someone else?

He didn’t stop by the kitchen or her room before he went back to his room, wrapped in a towel and still soaked. This trip couldn’t have been better timed. He clearly needed time away to remember what their relationship actually was.

And just how little he actually deserved to get out of it.

Despite the weekend, Dave’s internal clock woke him up early in the morning. He got out of bed, got dressed, left a note for Rose and left the apartment. Lied about getting called into work. He’d go in anyway. If for any reason she decided she was going to stop by he could easily just say he was on his break. That was simple enough.

Arriving there he tried to write. He honestly tried but it was impossible. He was still angry at himself for what he did and ashamed that he let it happen and even wanted to do it in the first place. It was disgusting and inexcusable and his bad mood showed in every line he wrote. He was almost done- he had more than enough to present with a pitch. Especially considering he would have to end up rewriting the entire thing time and time again before it got on screen anyway. And that was assuming they would even take his script instead of hiring someone else to write it.

There really wasn’t any point in working as hard as he was.

Rose never showed up. By the time he went home she had already left for work, a note of her own sitting on top of his exactly where he had left it that morning.

 

_Dinner is in the fridge- Here’s hoping we actually see each other tomorrow._

_RL_

 

Not if he had anything to say about it- that was for damn sure.

His day of creative block turned into an evening of video games. Rose tried to call him at one point in the evening, but he let it ring. Perfectly understandable, right? He made sure he was asleep by the time she got off work, and when morning came around, he was out by nine. Good thing, too, since Rose was texting him before he even got to the coffee shop.

 

ROSE LALONDE [09:07 AM]: Where are you?

 

He really didn’t want to answer her but. It had been about 36 hours since they’d last spoke. It’d at least be nice to let her know she hadn’t done anything wrong here.

 

DAVE STRIDER [09:15 AM]: gym  
ROSE LALONDE [09:17 AM]: I didn’t know you went to a gym.   
DAVE STRIDER [09:18 AM]: well you do now  
DAVE STRIDER [09:18 AM]: go back to bed  
ROSE LALONDE [09:20 AM]: Is something bothering you?

 

There it was.

 

DAVE STRIDER [09:21 AM]: not at all  
ROSE LALONDE [09:22 AM]: That sounds like sarcasm.   
ROSE LALONDE [09:22 AM]: Or at the very least, a lie.   
DAVE STRIDER [09:22 AM]: its not a lie  
ROSE LALONDE [09:23 AM]: Please talk to me?

 

Fucking Christ, Rose. He had to swallow as his throat got dry and his exhale was loud and careful. He could feel it in his eyes, that familiar pooling of tears. Hell no, he was not going to cry about this.

 

DAVE STRIDER [09:25 AM]: theres nothing to talk about  
ROSE LALONDE [09:26 AM]: You’ve never acted like this before. Did something happen?  
DAVE STRIDER [09:26 AM]: no nothing happened   
DAVE STRIDER [09:26 AM]: im fine ok  
DAVE STRIDER [09:27 AM]: just  
DAVE STRIDER [09:27 AM]: leave me alone

 

He stared at his phone, breathing carefully and nervously. He half expected her to start calling, demanding answers and start shrinking him or whatever the fuck. But.

 

ROSE LALONDE [09:30 AM]: Alright.

 

Five minutes, 10 minutes, 20 minutes passed and she never messaged back. He should be feeling victorious. Instead he just felt like even more of an asshole than he did before. But this was for the best, and that was the end of it.

After he had a few days away to think everything over, they could go back to normal. He’d go back to actually fucking caring about her like a human being should, and he could forget this entire incident had happened in the first place.

Exactly how it should be.


	15. Chapter 15

Rose didn’t speak with him for the rest of the week. She snuffed him if they walked by each other in the hallway, and made a show of only cooking meals for herself. He knew that he deserved it, but somehow it still made him angry. She didn’t even know why he was ignoring her, she had no idea what she was mad at, and she was still playing games. She just could not straight up talk about anything, could she?

He didn’t bother waking her when he left for the airport. He left another note, just a flat, “see you in three days” and stuck it on top of the stack they had been passive aggressively accumulating since he left the first one. 

Somehow though he was staring at the airport doors the entire time he was in it. While he waited in line, while he waited at security, even once he was through- He was stuck imagining all those shitty movies where some guy spent hundreds of dollars on a plane ticket just to tell some girl that he loved her. That shit never happened in life. But he sort of wished it did. At least just this once. He really, really didn’t want to leave without saying goodbye.

But as far as he knew, she didn’t want to say it anyway. So why the hell should he bother.

He’d given up when he was called to board. There was no movie magic happening here. It was stupid of him to ever think there was going to be. He was acting like a fucking 12-year-old.

He tossed his bag into the overhead bin after freeing his laptop from it. Flopped down in his seat where he was sitting next to some grumpy looking dude who couldn’t be much older than him. He could introduce himself, but why the fuck would he want to do that. That guy’s bed head said enough about his personality that Dave could tell it would be a bad idea to bother.

Instead he just sat back and waited. Waited as they positioned themselves on the runway, waited as they started forward, waited as they reached altitude. He put in his headphones and started up their in-flight _Iron Man 3_ showing, accepting a glass of apple juice from the stewardess with the drink cart. The moment he could he was pulling his laptop from the pocket, lowering his tray and opening it up which was, he realized, the first time in days.

He got himself connected to the wifi, not exactly sure what he was planning on doing with it. He ignored Pesterchum as it signed in automatically and instead skipped right over to Skype. His brother wasn’t online, so there wasn’t much point to that. He considered not bothering with the internet at all, until from his dock a Pesterchum window pushed its way open. And fuck, it was from days ago.

 

\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] on 06/17/13 at 4:13 AM --

 

TT: I’m not really sure what’s happened that’s gotten you so upset recently.  
TT: I mean, I’m hoping it’s not something I did.  
TT: But I don’t really know what to think.  
TT: I thought everything was fine, then I wake up and you’re gone, and you won’t answer your phone.  
TT: Is it because I’m being too needy?  
TT: I know I tend to get comfortable with people and in turn I lean on them a lot but.  
TT: I don’t mean to smother you, if that is indeed what has happened here.  
TT: I’m beginning to realize how much I hurt others when I sneak around instead of telling them upfront what’s happening.  
TT: So please, if this is some sort of test, you can stop it.  
TT: I get it now.  
TT: I can’t sleep, I can’t write, I can hardly eat. The guilt is drowning me and I don’t even know what I’ve done to feel guilty about.  
TT: All I can do is make assumptions and say I’m sorry, but I’m not supposed to do that anymore.   
TT: So instead I’ll just say that I’m sorry that you are hurting, or angry.  
TT: And I really, really wish you felt comfortable enough to talk to me about it.  
TT: Because I feel so comfortable and safe with you.  
TT: And the fact that I can’t return that feeling... It’s pathetic. I am pathetic.  
TT: And I am so sorry.  
TT: I know you’re leaving in a few days and won’t be back for a few more so I hope time away from me will help you feel better. And when you return, I’ll try not to lean on you so much.

 

\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG] on 06/17/13 at 5:01 AM --

 

Dave was dumbfounded. His fingers were twitching as they ached to respond to her. Beg to explain that no, _no_ she had it all wrong, she hadn’t done anything wrong and him keeping tight lipped wasn’t her downfall. But what was the point in that? She wasn’t online, he couldn’t call her in the air, and hell, she had _class_ anyway so she probably wouldn’t be answering for quite some time, either.

In the midst of his panic he felt a tap on his shoulder. Looking over, he was surprised to see the grump from before with an even angrier expression in his face.

“What the fuck did you do,” he said lowly, practically seething. Dave was taken aback- offended really.

“Do I _know_ you?"

The stranger didn’t answer. Just turned his head away and stared out of his window.

Good, you weird fucking prick. Stay out of business that isn’t yours.

He never wanted her to blame herself. That was the last thing he wanted. He just wanted her to be mad at him, like he deserved in the first place. Instead he was fucking everything up and sending mixed messages and leaving her confused and lost. Not to mention alone, now that he wasn’t in the state.

He would explain when he got back. Let her relax without thinking about him, give himself a break to think over just _how_ he was going to fix this. Hell, maybe he could fix it by telling her the truth. That he was attracted to her and wanted to be with her and took it too far and that’s why he was so embarrassed of himself.

Haha, yeah, if that was going to happen he would _definitely_ need time away to mentally prepare himself.

He’d at least send her a text message to let her know he survived the flight, but after that it was detox time. He did still have the biggest day of his life tomorrow.

The rest of the flight was spent trying to sleep. The soothing sounds of mach suits exploding in his film helped to a minimal degree. The kid next to him watching _Hitch_ on his iPod did not.

Thankfully they landed in one piece, and Dave was able to light up his cell phone before he was even off the plane. Took a couple minutes to find service, but after it did he was quick to pull up his messages.

 

DAVE STRIDER [08:32 AM]: hey i made it alive  
DAVE STRIDER [08:33 AM]: los angeles ho  
ROSE LALONDE [08:36 AM]: I’m glad. Best of luck tomorrow.

 

Damn did he feel relieved seeing her actually answer. He organized his bags and deplaned, maneuvering his way to the baggage claim with his cell phone still in hand. 

 

DAVE STRIDER [08:45 AM]: i got your messages btw  
DAVE STRIDER [08:47 AM]: ill explain when im back but i promise that nothing here was your fault ok  
DAVE STRIDER [08:50 AM]: you dont have to change anything youre doing

 

His phone went back into his pocket just long enough for him to grab his bag off the conveyer. He wasted no time heading out to grab a taxi, spitting off his hotel address without even making eye contact.

 

ROSE LALONDE [09:03 AM]: But you still aren’t comfortable enough to talk to me about what’s bothering you. I’m not giving you what you’re giving me.

 

He had half a mind to tell her not to worry about it, that he was the guy here and it was practically his responsibility to take care of her. But a girl like Rose probably wasn’t interested in that kind of fairy tale, chivalry bullshit.

 

DAVE STRIDER [09:05 AM]: thats my short coming not yours  
DAVE STRIDER [09:05 AM]: look i promise ok we will talk about this when im home and i will tell you everything  
ROSE LALONDE [09:06 AM]: Can you at least tell me what specifically triggered all of this?   
DAVE STRIDER [09:08 AM]: arent you in class  
ROSE LALONDE [09:10 AM]: Yes.

 

Well, that distraction plan didn’t work. Alright, fine. It would be easier to tell her when he didn’t have to look at her face anyway.

 

DAVE STRIDER [09:14 AM]: alright fine friday night i heard you talking to that guy and i dont know why but i just got really jealous that you were talking to him instead of me  
ROSE LALONDE [09:15 AM]: That’s what you’ve been so squirrely about?   
DAVE STRIDER [09:15 AM]: no  
ROSE LALONDE [09:16 AM]: Oh.  
DAVE STRIDER [09:17 AM]: i was angry so i tried to get back at you by   
DAVE STRIDER [09:18 AM]: well  
DAVE STRIDER [09:20 AM]: fantasizing  
ROSE LALONDE [09:22 AM]: About?  
DAVE STRIDER [09:23 AM]: you obviously   
ROSE LALONDE [09:24 AM]: What about me?

 

If Rose was good at anything, it was being a pain in the ass. She was well fucking aware what he meant. He knew she was. She was being purposefully obtuse just to get him to admit it. Christ.

 

DAVE STRIDER [09:35 AM]: come on rose the fantasy was about doing you   
DAVE STRIDER [09:35 AM]: we fucked and i jacked off thinking about it   
ROSE LALONDE [09:38 AM]: Oh.

 

Dave almost tripped as he tried to get out of the cab and grab his bags as fast as possible. This was not an ideal time to be leaving this conversation. Not in the slightest. He pulled his things into the lobby, ignoring the woman at the front desk in favor of going back to look at his phone.

 

ROSE LALONDE [09:40 AM]: Is that all?

 

“Are you serious,” he said aloud, flushed and frustrated and what the _fuck._

 

DAVE STRIDER [09:42 AM]: what  
DAVE STRIDER [09:44 AM]: what do you mean is that all that has been eating at me since i fucking did it

Now he was at least ready to acknowledge what he was doing, dragging his bag to the counter.

“I have a reservation,” he said, hoisting his computer bag to get it into a more comfortable position. “It’s under either Dirk or Dave Strider. Can’t remember which.”

The woman’s fingers danced across keys as her gaze stayed locked to the computer screen.

“Alright Mr. Strider I have you down in a king suite for two nights. Everything was prepaid so we’ll just need a card on file for any charges you might make to the room.”

“Yeah, okay,” he answered boredly, tugging out his wallet and fingering through it to offer up a credit card. Then he made the mistake of checking his phone again.

 

ROSE LALONDE [09:50 AM]: Dave it is not uncommon for people, especially males, to use sexual acts as a means of gaining power over another. Fantasizing about me in such a light merely serves you a world where you can control my actions and you don’t have to fret about any sort of betrayal that may come of me branching out and speaking to other people- notably, other men. It’s a power fantasy. It’s not like you were peeping on me changing or anything akin to molestation. It was never about sex. Trust me, I’m not bothered in the slightest. I’ve had similar fantasies myself about others.

 

“Jesus dick,” he breathed, not looking up until the woman at the counter cleared her throat. She was handing back his card, and he snatched it with a quick, “Shit, sorry.”

He took off for the elevator once he had his room keys, thankful that no one was in it.

DAVE STRIDER [09:57 AM]: are you serious  
ROSE LALONDE [09:58 AM]: Very much so. You had no reason to feel so guilty.

 

Carefully he smirked to himself, lifting his free hand to push up his bangs. Jesus Christ, he should have brought this to her right away. He literally pulled exactly what he had spent so long convincing her not to pull and it bit him in the ass.

 

DAVE STRIDER [10:00 AM]: so if youve fantasized about others have you ever fantasized about me  
ROSE LALONDE [10:04 AM]: Wouldn’t you like to know?  
DAVE STRIDER [10:05 AM]: yes  
ROSE LALONDE [10:07 AM]: I’ll tell you after we get back from your movie premiere.   
DAVE STRIDER [10:08 AM]: no fair i just told you that i did it  
ROSE LALONDE [10:10 AM]: Focus on your pitch. You have a big day tomorrow. I’ll hear all about it then.

 

Rose was right, in all fairness. He did have a huge day tomorrow. And on such short notice with the added sprinkle of drama, he had exactly no time to even begin to prepare. He would have liked a break to see the city, but that clearly wasn’t in the cards. Bro made sure of that. The asshole.

At least the room was nice. Huge bed, huge bathroom, huge TV. He opened his bags on the bench by the door, digging out his laptop and charger and setting them up at the desk. What was the perfect way to describe his movie in a couple sentences that was going to win over a couple of corporate white guys. Obviously the talk of bromances, an attractive female love interest, racial segregation and MILFs would be must mentions.

Of course he had to consider how to explain that all those things were what the audience wanted, too. He could definitely use his position as a young male to sell that. He had this. There was no way he did not have this.

 

Except he didn’t.

“It’s just our opinion that the friendly black mentor trope is... _Overdone_ ,” said one of the guys. He tried to play it off as friendly advice, hands spinning around as he tried to look for the right word. “It’s risky to say the least. We wouldn’t want the American public finding themselves safe with strangers and blaming us because we always showed black men as undeniably trustworthy.”

Dave bit his tongue. Were these guys fucking serious right now? This was literally straight up racism going on here. This was the same shit he heard from his grade school teachers when he modeled his protagonists after himself or his brother.

“That isn’t to say we wouldn’t reconsider if you were to _whiten_ things up, so to speak.”

“Yes,” was the next thing he heard, another voice speaking up from the other side of the desk. “You have a cute set up here. But making jokes around the delicate issue of becoming a man and coming of age can hinder a youth’s ability to grow. That’s the last thing we’d want to cause.”

That sounded like some ripe fucking bullshit.

“We just aren’t really looking for comedy movies right now. That’s not what our company is about.”

Dave sat back in his seat, trying to keep his calm while he focused on his breathing and not punching the lights out of these assholes. He tried to stay polite, laughing in a way that wasn’t too mocking.

“But I mean. You guys made Army of Darkness. You made American Pie, I mean. That’s exactly the audience I’m aimed at here.”

The two men shared a laugh. Dave’s smile was quick to fade off. He clearly missed the fucking joke here.

“That was the 90’s, Mr. Striker. A very different time, a very different generation of youth. I’m sure for someone of your age that was a fine example of a perfect movie. But this generation demands more. Movies need a strong message for them to even hit the charts. And honestly... Stick with your ‘bros’ isn’t exactly groundbreaking on the morality scale.”

It’s not that he was expecting this to go exactly how he imagined it. But he also wasn’t really expecting to be told that the idea he had been shaping for his entire life wasn’t... _Relevant._

A hand fell on his shoulder before he had the chance to notice that the men were getting up.

“You’ve got a bright mind, Kid. You just need to learn a bit more about the business. You’re halfway there already, if you think about it. You made excellent use of your female characters, after all." 

Yeah. As in they were just hardly developed plot devices and eye candy. The part of his script he felt the most ashamed of. Great.

He gave a slow nod and the producers were gone, leaving Dave alone in the conference room. Fuck, did he feel like shit now. Nevermind the fact that he had all night to kill and an early flight tomorrow. He was angry. Annoyed and offended and _scared_ and angry. He snatched up his phone to busy his hands. He had a missed call from Rose while his phone was on silent.

Looks like she left a voicemail, too. Whatever.

Bitterly he shoved his things back into his shoulder bag. When he got to his feet he gave his chair a ceremonious kick, only slightly satisfied with the way it crashed to the floor and sprung in recoil.

This whole thing was a mistake. Wasting time with writing this thing, even bringing these characters _back_ from the 4chan Hell they were laid to rest in. It was definitely a fucking mistake to tell Bro about it so he could plan this whole thing.

And it was most assuredly, without a fucking _doubt_ , a mistake to let Rose convince him that all of this wasn’t a waste of time. That he could actually achieve something and that any of it was worthwhile.

From now on he’d keep his interests to himself where they belonged.

Even when he got back to the hotel room he didn’t bother calling her back, or updating Bro. He climbed in bed, charged dinner to the room, put the TV on for background noise. He was furious and his throat felt sore and dry.

He didn’t want to talk about this. He especially didn’t want to talk about this with Rose. He could hear it now, the way she’d probably shrink him to oblivion, tell him it was okay and to just give up because hey, that’s what she did and she’s still happy. Because what matters is what he thought of his work, not what they thought of it. That was what he had been telling her for weeks after all. But that was without a doubt the last thing he wanted to hear. But he couldn’t exactly fight that advice either. She had taken it, it had meant a lot to her. If he went back on it now...

It’d crush her.

He didn’t listen to her voicemail. He watched terrible PayPerView porn until he was asleep, grumbling at the wake up call that started ringing at six. He didn’t bother going back on his laptop- just caught up on his sleep while he was waiting in the airport and after he had gotten on the plane. Before he knew it he had already landed. He was dreading calling a cab to take him home. He was dreading going home. He was dreading seeing Rose. Not when he had failed after she actually wasted a breath believing in him.

But despite his fear he did head back. He dragged his suitcase behind him into the building, slumped into the corner of the elevator, and slowly trudged to the front door. Twisting the knob he found it unlocked. And opening the door, a comforting scent of spaghetti came pouring out.

Rose was at the stove stirring sauce while a frying pan of beef and veggies and a steaming pot of noodles cooked on the rest of the stovetop. When the door opened she looked up, her face flushed from the heat and her lips pulled back in a wide grin. Dave felt something sink in him- even with his worry he just wished he could waltz up and kiss her deeply and just _hold on_. Hold on to her face, just watch her eyes until nothing else mattered, hold onto her body for stability and just know that no matter what, she’d be holding onto him, too.

But that was a daydream.

“You’re home! Just in time for dinner.”

Dave couldn’t even smile. His cheeks felt like they were weighing down his entire face.

“Yeah,” he answered, stepping into the kitchen and leaving his suitcase in the middle of the foyer. He didn’t have it in him to put it anywhere. “Smells good as always.”

It was obvious Rose could hear the lack of energy in his voice. Her smile faltered for just a second before she turned away to finish cooking.

“Well I hope you’re hungry, at least. I’m more than ready to hear about your trip.”

_Of course you are._

“Not much to tell,” he answered quietly, managing to hold back a sigh. “Went to LA, went to a meeting, basically got laughed out the door, came home.”

Rose turned to look at him. She was silent for the first few moments, before a crack of the throat made it clear she was trying to think of something to say. “Dave I,” she started finally, sighing quickly. “I’m sorry.”

Sure. Sure she was. She didn’t know anything that he was going through, but sure she was _sorry_. His vision went out of focus for a moment as he dropped his head, his entire body going limp. 

“It’s alright,” he responded quietly, sloppily dragging a chair from the table to drop himself into. Rose almost flinched at the unpleasant sound, busying herself in cupboards to grab plates.

“I really am. I know the rejection is tough to swallow. When you feel like you aren’t really good for anything and your ideas are worthless. But they aren’t, I promise.”

“Can we just not fucking talk about this, please,” he begged, dropping his head into his hands. His voice was hoarse, his shoulders were shaking as he bit back the sob that so desperately wanted to ring through them. He didn’t trust himself not to break down over this. He didn’t want to be seen that way. To take something- that she handled with so much class and grace- so hard.

“Sorry,” she answered, her voice hushed slightly. “I just don’t want you to give up.”

Here it comes. The same speech he had given her time and time again. Boy did he not want to hear it. She started approaching the table with a plate in hand, still with that smug smile on her face.

“After all, no opinion of any corporate big wig could ever--”

“Stop!”

He hadn’t meant to raise his voice. Rose went silent in an instant. He couldn’t even hear her footsteps, just the sound of boiling sauce on the stove. His head was spinning. He pulled his hands from his face to keep speaking.

“I don’t want to hear about how I just shouldn’t give up because as long as I love my work it’s good enough. We _aren’t_ the same. I don’t _want_ the same things as you. So please, just. Stop.”

“I know that,” she choked, her voice barely a whisper. “I said that to you. In my message. That we were different.”

He froze, watching Rose through his fingers. He never listened to her voicemail.

Choking down his pride he watched her, swallowing.

“And what... do you mean by different.”

She finally set down the plate in front of him, turning around to start a plate of her own.

“Dave, you shoot the pictures. You don’t write the stories. You wrote this script because these were your characters that you wanted to bring forward. You didn’t write it because you love to write. I write because I love to write.”

Well yeah, sounded right so far.

“I will always be writing. I’ll have a million different stories that may or may not get published and that will be my forever. This is your one story. You shouldn’t give up on it. Just because one company doesn’t want it, doesn’t mean you should give it up. Find more people to hear it. Revise it and come back. Don’t give up on it, no matter what they say or how many people shut you down.”

Okay, so maybe her shrinking was more spot on than he gave her credit for. He found himself smirking, even as he felt her slide his glasses off his face and onto her apron. Her arms move around his neck, and like it was the obvious response, he let his head fall against her breast.

“We need something different, even if our struggles are the same. You get that, right?”

“Yeah.”

Fuck, he wanted to kiss her. Would it be wrong to kiss her right now?

She pulled him in closer and her head dropped on top of his. He stayed perfectly still against her, enjoying her company and the sound of her heartbeat.

“I’m sorry,” he managed, his eyes unfocused when he opened them. “I really fucked up here, didn’t I?”

It sounded more like a question than he intended. But Rose just fingered through his hair and exhaled in an almost sigh.

“I’m alright. I was a little confused, but I’d be a hypocrite if I complained.”

He really wanted to refute that. Tell her not to stand for this. But a selfish longing was keeping his mouth shut. He didn’t want to lose what they had. He definitely didn’t want to lose his chance with her.

“Don’t let me do it again,” he told her, moving his arms around her waist and hoisting her up by it. He could hear her hold back laughter, trying to seem more calm and cool than she actually was. “I swear, slap me, yell at me. Whatever it takes to snap me out of it."

“Promise you’ll tell me off.” His tone was stoic despite his smirk, practically pulling her into his lap.

“Okay I promise, just let me go so I can eat.”

He did as he was told, letting her get her plate and bring it to the table. They ate together in near silence, Rose checking her phone every once in awhile to waste some extra time. When she was finished eating though she just watched him, propping her head up with a hand over her mouth.

One of the few times she could actually look in his eyes, and one of the few times he wasn’t totally uncomfortable having someone look into them. Her expression was pretty flat for a couple seconds, and she reached one of her hands over to push his bangs out of his face.

“Do you ever wonder about... I don’t know. Fate?”

That was an odd thing to hear coming from Rose of all people.

“What kind of fate?”

“I mean... Do you think it’s possible that the reason we met is because we were destined to?”

That was oddly heavy handed. He was probably flushing- thanks, Rose.

“Not necessarily because we’re supposed to get married or anything, but just because. Well, we’re supposed to meet. In general. For whatever reason.”

“I dunno,” he answered, leaning his head back. That definitely wasn’t a topic he ever thought about. “Doubt I’d even care until fate brought me to something shitty. You’re alright so. Doesn’t make a difference to me.”

There was a small smile on her face before she rolled her eyes. She pulled her hand away, picking up both of their plates and dropping them into the sink.

“You’re still cleaning.”

“Fuck.”


	16. Chapter 16

It had started to come to Rose’s attention that she might like Dave.

At first it was just a sneaking suspicion- the rush of having a knight in shining armor to tame her like the dragon she was (she was far from the princess, after all), but the moment she found herself capable of taming him, too, it felt different. Something shifted and settled and it felt more serious and more legitimate and more... _Mutual_. He was a partner instead of a babysitter. And maybe she wasn’t the princess, but he wasn’t a prince either, and they were just two ugly dragons hoarding jewels together and fighting sometimes but ultimately, still enjoying each other’s company like no dragon before them.

She kept telling herself to be cautious, to be scared, to be wary of herself and her feelings lest he take advantage of them. But any time she tried to look over at him in suspicion he was just being the same relaxed asshole he always was. And she time and time again turned away with a smile and returned to whatever she was doing. There was nothing to be suspicious of, for the first time. She couldn’t even force it. She was just comfortable. She really trusted him. Maybe even more than she trusted Jade.

Her new friend that she had made had told her that he probably was a very close person in their past lives, like a husband or a brother. But he insisted that he wouldn’t be able to say for sure until he could see them both in person. Apparently if their auras had matching scars, their previous bodies shared DNA. If their auras were to be overlapped, if the scars met in the middle, it meant they were lovers. It didn’t really mean much to either way to Rose, but it was still cute how passionate that guy got about these things. He bordered on being as much of a dork as Dave was.

Dave was relaxing around the apartment now that they were in more of a position of mutual understanding. He’d thrown out his self appointed position of emotional support sometime after he got back from Los Angeles, taking down his guard progressively more often. Rose was still getting used to being on the other side of the notepad, but she was thankful for the chances. Anything to help her feel like she was as important to him as he was to her. She wanted to give back however she could.

Even with more material things, Dave was opening up and they were evening out . He started helping with the cooking- it gave lots of opportunities for Rose to tease him- and they ended up starting a rhythm of actually cleaning together instead of Dave cleaning up after Rose everyday. They were operating as a total team instead of two separate units. It was something Rose had never done before, but seemed to almost come naturally to her with him. Maybe they really were related in a past life.

Despite all of that, there seemed to be some sort of block that made Rose _forget_ that such a mutual understanding could be turned into a date. But had she really forgotten? Because she had the thought it already. Maybe she was actually sitting here trying to convince herself she had forgotten, because not thinking of it sounded better than being too chicken shit to actually ask him if he was interested. Was part of her still in the mindset that the guys had to ask the girls? Or maybe... It was normal for anyone to be too nervous to ask someone out like that. Either way... She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t even bring herself to think about doing it.

It was a fuck up with Kanaya. It’ll be a fuck up with Dave.

They’d settled in after dinner in front of the sink, Dave scrubbing pots and dishes and one by one, handing them off to Rose for her to dry and put away. The radio was playing top of the hour news updates, and every once in awhile Dave would pause to mock something that happened. Her personal favorite was his flat response of “That would have never happened in Canada.”

She was having fun working with him like this. Working together.

“How do cars even pile up,” he asked, dunking a spatula and pulling the rubber head off the handle. “Like are there microscopic super ants that push them once they stop moving? We’re talking about several tons of metal, they can’t just pile up.”

“More than likely the term ‘pile-up’ is just a turn of phrase. They merely mean an accident in which cars crashed in an excess.”

Dave laughed as he dropped the tool he was washing into the drainer, glancing over at Rose with an amused grin. “I can’t believe you actually answered that as if there was any way I could possibly believe that ants were responsible for piling up cars.”

Rose grinned back, pulling the wooden handle into her towel and giving it a lazy dry. “Oh, shut up.”

“I bet they have microscopic ants in Canada,” he insisted, dreamily looking up. “Bless those moose-worshiping bastards. I dig at Canada a lot, but there is this one Canadian indie band I'm all about recently. I should send you some of their stuff." 

The news ended after a few minutes of weather, allowing the DJ another chance to vamp before three minutes of commercials. All the while Dave remained diligently working. Rose had to push herself to keep up with him. He would not have let her live it down if she fell too far behind.

The radio went silent as the scheduled song began. A familiar slow and bouncy guitar riff started, and Rose’s head lolled as she listened. Of course, _Miss Independent_ , her only weakness. If she sang along to this she’d be done for. But how could she resist? Still keeping up with Dave’s washing she allowed herself a quiet hum- which only lasted a couple lines.

“ _Miss keep-your-distance._ ”

Dave didn’t look up. Maybe she was singing just quietly enough that he wouldn’t notice.

“ _Miss unafraid, miss outta-my-way, miss, don’t let a man, interfere._ ”

When his arm moved to hand off the next dish she panicked, halting her tongue and opting instead to focus on drying it. A single verse passed, but she was still tempted.

“ _So by keeping her heart protected, she’d never ever feel rejected._ ” Yes, she was into this now. Damn this song.

“ _Little miss apprehensive, I said ooh, she fell in love._ ”

Suddenly there was a loud splash in the other sink as Dave threw down the bowl he was washing. His hand gripped tighter to the scrubbing brush he was using, and within a second the bristles were inches from his lips. He turned to face her as his legs parted, knees bent ever so slightly. He inhaled quickly and without warning, began bellowing out the next verse.

“ _What is this feeling taking over?! Thinking no one could open the door!_ ”

Rose was reduced to laughter. She couldn’t even concentrate on drying her measuring cup, opting instead to turn to face him and break out a grin. She could already feel tears in her eyes listening to him, watching the usual stiffness of his body movements as he went- she couldn’t believe he was doing this all with a straight fucking face. 

“ _Surprise! It’s time! To feel! What’s real!_ ”

“Oh my God, Dave.”

“ _What happened to Miss Independent? No longer need to be defensive!_ ”

She watched with bitten back laughs as he reached a hand out toward her. She was almost tempted to take it.

“ _Goodbye, old you, when love, is true._ ”

Just like that he stopped, the chorus dying down into the next verse. He turned back to his sink as if nothing had even happened, working on his next dish. But there was still a distinct tap in his foot and rhythmic bounce in his shoulder that kept Rose encouraged. She continued to sing along- a bit louder this time, knocking her hips to the side and cocking her head as she simultaneously dried. 

“ _Miss guarded-heart, miss play-it-smart, miss if-you-wanna-use-that-line-you-better-not-start, no_.” 

She was smiling. It was bright and entertained and she was having fun. Having fun doing chores and doing housework when she should be writing.

“ _But she miscalculated, she didn’t want to end up jaded. And this miss, decided not to miss out on true love, so._ ”

Purposefully she averted her gaze, but soon enough it was back on Dave, admiring his face while he worked.

“ _By changing her misconception, she went in a new direction. And found inside, she felt a connection. She fell in love._ ”

Sentimentality flew out the window as Dave roared again, popping up like a jack-in-the-box and taking her completely off guard. Her knees were buckling from the laughter, and she admired his total-not-serious voice as he missed notes and threw tempo out the window.

“ _Goodbye! Old you! When love... When love is true._ ”

She fell into the hook instinctually, gently closing her eyes and tracing the edge of her plate idly with her fingertips.

“ _When Miss Independent walked away... No time for love that came her way. She looked in the mirror and thought today... What happened to Miss-no-longer-afraid._ ”

Huh... Was this the first time she really listened to these lyrics? They became so applicable all of a sudden. Music really was magic, wasn’t it? She opened her eyes slightly, keeping her gaze downcast.

“ _It took some time for her to see... How beautiful love could truly be._ ”

Hesitantly she raised her eyes, moving her gaze over to catch a glimpse of Dave’s face. He was actually looking back at her, his expression a familiar blank. But it was... Warm. She felt warm. Maybe... She really did want to date Dave. Maybe it would be worth the risk. 

“ _No more talk of ‘Why can’t that be me.’ I’m so glad I finally see._ ”

She prepared herself for him to start up the next iteration of the chorus, but he was silent. He just blinked a couple times, before gesturing behind her.

“Your phone is ringing.”

Pulled back into reality Rose stood up straight, turning her gaze to the counter where her phone was lit up and buzzing quietly. Giving her hands a shake she reached to pick it up, hitting answer. Jade was calling again? Good, it’d been too long since she heard from her last. And right now, advice from Jade sounded like exactly what she needed.

“Hey!” She greeted, reaching for her towel to dry her hands. “Hold on a moment, let me just get into the other room. You’d be so proud, Jade, Dave’s got me doing chores. It’s incredible.”

“They’re pulling the plug,” Jade answered, ignoring Rose’s news entirely. Rose stopped dead in her tracks, her body stiffening. Did she hear that right?

“You mean...”

“Yeah,” she confirmed. “The doctor says it’s time to take him off life support now. That there isn’t much left to do and he’s just going to be in pain if we continue."

It felt like the entire world was spinning and Rose was frozen in place. Her heart sunk in her chest and she felt heavy. She found herself stumbling as she reached for the counter, practically falling into it once she knew it was there.

“Jade...”

“We aren’t exactly sure how long he’s going to last off the machines- it could be hours or days- depends on how much he holds on. We aren’t really hoping for anything major, though. It’s apparently a miracle he’s kept it up for this long, the stubborn bastard.”

Rose didn’t really know how to respond. Jade was laughing, but it was airy and weak- nothing like the laugh Rose remembered. It was hollow and fake. Pained. She stayed quiet.

“Anyway, I just wanted to keep you updated, make sure you knew. I still have to deal with the funeral and the house. He has so much old junk from his adventuring days it’ll probably take weeks to get it all sold. I sure as hell don’t want it. I won’t be bringing back the urn either. I’d rather keep his ashes on the island where they belong. A headstone in Melbourne is nice but it’s not where he belongs." 

Rose didn’t realize she had fallen on the floor until she felt Dave’s hands at her sides to hoist her back up. She offered a silent thank you, keeping herself pressed against him. Her cheeks felt heavy. Her eyes were stinging and her throat felt like something was clawing its way out.

“That...” She choked, forcing up a smile. “That sounds lovely, Jade. I’m sure he’ll appreciate it.”

“Yeah,” Jade agreed, her voice fading into barely a whisper. “I’m gonna go back to his room now. Have a good night, Rose.”

She couldn’t even breathe a “you too.” What would the point be? She hung up the phone but didn’t put it down. She felt heavy- so fucking heavy- and if it wasn’t for Dave holding her up, she would have already fallen back down.

Everything was so fun and happy and light hearted. She was laughing and enjoying someone’s company. Somehow, she couldn’t even fathom something this terrible happening at the same time. How could it? How could someone be hurting so much while she was standing idly by having the time of her life?

“What happened?” Dave eventually asked, keeping his voice quiet. Rose’s hands found his forearms, moving around them for stability. Something still she could hold onto while things did such a disgusting 180 around her.

She tried to act like she was okay. She pushed up a smirk, but it was quick to falter. “Jade’s grandfather is being taken off life support. C’est la vie.”

She felt so fucking weak. Light as air. Before she knew it Dave’s arm was slung under her knees and he was hoisting her up. She could feel his wet hands soaking into her stockings as her head fell to rest against his shoulder. Her eyes stung- they _stung_ like she needed to cry but nothing was happening. Was it just out of fear, rather than sadness? She wasn’t losing anyone- maybe she was just afraid of the changes that would no doubt happen.

Dave rested her down on the couch and took a seat at the end of it. Her head fell back into his lap and in total silence, she just stared upward. Her hand still gripped her phone as it lay limp across her stomach. Her eyelids fluttered but she kept them open. Dave’s fingers delivered a soft continuous stroke to her hair, but she didn’t let them pull her to sleep. She lay silent and awake, mouth closed. 

 

It felt like hours later when she felt her phone vibrate again. Two quick bursts, indicating a text message. She should check it first, just to make sure. 

But she didn’t.

Next to the window, the last shriveled bud on Jade’s dying plant broke off.

It was instant- the stinging in her eyes found their relief, her vision blurring as they welled up with tears. They almost tickled as they rolled down her temples. With a sniffle she rolled onto her side, bringing up a fist and using it to grab at Dave’s thigh. She didn’t want to sob, but her throat was burning to the point that it hurt- it _hurt_ to act like she was okay.

But why wasn’t she okay? She had never even _met_ Jade’s grandfather. What reason did she have to be this upset?

Dave still never said a word. He fingered through her hair, he thumbed at her tears, but he didn’t speak. Hell, he hardly looked at her. Somehow he just understood that she needed privacy, but also company. She needed no interference but she also needed to not be alone. For whatever reason, thinking about him understanding that about her just made her cry harder.

It didn’t stop for twenty minutes. By then she couldn’t keep her eyes open anymore. She still had to sniff every other moment, but the tears had stopped. And instead of feeling like a burden, the weight on her now was just relaxation. Feeling Dave’s hand, listening to his breaths, buried in his scent. She had exhausted her energy, and in an environment like that, it was easy for her to fall right to sleep.

She woke up when she heard the quiet squeak of her door. Light poured in through the crack and landed on her face, making her eyes squeeze and twitch in an attempt to reject it. A breathy “ _shit_ ” made her open her eyes, and she noticed a fuzzy, shadowed Dave stumbling in through the door, a plate in his hand.

“Sorry,” he started, still whispering. “I didn’t mean to wake you up but your room is a fucking disaster.”

Rose smiled as she closed her eyes, bringing an arm out from under the blanket to cover her eyes.

“I see you carried me back to my room after I fell asleep. Sneaking an attack at my daddy issues isn’t going to work, you know.”

Dave’s response was his usual lopsided smirk, and he took a seat at the end of the bed and held out the plate he brought in. Toast and eggs? Really?

“You were really upset about Jade’s pops last night so I want to make sure you have a good day today. You know how some people don’t have funerals but instead have celebrations of life? We’ll do that just you and me. I got board games I have a Gurren Lagann box set and you have booze. Let’s do it.”

Slowly she sat up, fingering through her bangs and keeping her gaze down. Out of all the things a strange man she decided to live with could be, why did Dave have to be so fucking caring and sweet? It made her want to laugh defensively- keep her guard up. But it also made her want to blush and grin like a six year old girl. She opted for a small smile, looking up at him to show her appreciation. She took the plate, crossing her legs under the blankets for a place to put it down.

“Alright, but at least let me get dressed first.” 


	17. Chapter 17

Dave wasn’t lying when he said he had planned a day. By the time Rose was dressed and fed, he was already well into setting up The Game of Life, the menu screen of his promised anime already loaded on the television. Rose emerged from her room surprisingly just in jeans and a t-shirt- something he had never actually seen her wear before. 

“So wait, I plan a day with you and I get the shitty laundry day outfit?”

Rose stopped in her tracks on her way to the kitchen with her dirty plate, cocking up her eyebrows in shock. Shit, shit what the fuck did he do that for. Why would he insult her first fucking thing on the day he was supposed to be cheering her up.

“I just mean it’s. Nice to see you’re going comfy and natural.”

Fuck, was that rude too?

“Not that-”

“ _Dave_. Relax. You’re not going to breathe any easier by shoving your foot further in your mouth. Let’s just remove it and move on.”

Jesus Christ. Okay, that was the last fuck up he was allowed to have today.

Rose put away her breakfast dish and came back to sit across from him, actually smiling as she looked over the board. “Here’s a game I haven’t played with anyone but my mother. Is this a ploy to get me to marry you?"

Despite the obvious joke Dave flushed a bit, shifting his legs underneath him. “Fuck no. You can’t even do that, you gotta marry some lame-ass game piece and have a shitty game piece family, with bitchy kids in the back seat that need to pee every five minutes and won’t stop asking you to stop at McDonald’s in every city. Not Dave Jr, no Davette, we aren’t fucking going to the goddamn Play Place. Shut up and sit your asses down.”

Rose didn’t laugh. Though she did have a serene smile on her face. He wasn’t sure he had seen one like that on her lips before. It was calm and comfortable, not like her usual smirks and grins. Her gaze was trained on the board, and after a silent moment she reached forward to pick up one of the cars.

“Whenever I played this game with my mother I would ask her why she bothered wedding when she couldn’t even do it in life. I was so bitter when I was young. I was jealous of these faceless little game constructs because they got to have a father and I didn’t.”

Another long silence followed. Even Dave could tell that wasn’t something to joke about. That came right from her heart and he couldn’t just fuck with it. He watched while she carefully selected a female playing piece and put it in her car, reaching over to place it at the start square. Dave found himself a male one, following suit.

“I was kind of the same way,” Dave admitted, carefully rubbing his nose with the pad of his thumb. He kept his gaze off of her for the most part, but after a couple flashed glances, he slid his sunglasses off his face and set them aside. He had to squint but. It was worth it. “I mean. If this was the game of life and life was all about going to college and getting a job and getting married and having kids and then heading off to retirement once they were adults then why did my brother and I get stuck fending for ourselves so fucking early. Why the hell should a 17-year-old and I get stuck fending for themselves at all? Why the hell should a 17-year-old be stuck raising a baby. And why the fuck does that baby need to be lied to and held at such a distance until it’s a teenager. I mean. Fuck. That’s probably why my eyes are so bad. Just insecurity and trauma manifested into a shitfest.”

He almost panicked when Rose got to her feet. But as he watched she just moved over to the windows, pulling down the shades. Instead of the bright morning the room filled with a soft orange, and the pain in his eyes alleviated. She sat back down when she was finished, sliding her hand across the table palm up and weaseling it under his. It made his heart jump a bit, but he just held it.

“Did he blame you?"

He could lie to make this all seem less pathetic. But he was already this deep. “Why wouldn’t he have.”

Rose didn’t ask for any clarification. Which was good, considering he was already nervous about telling anyone about this, let alone delving into details. But it just came out. It poured from his mouth, as if he had been waiting for this moment his entire life. Just begging for a chance to tell someone that things weren’t perfect and he was hurting.

But no one ever asked. Maybe he couldn’t keep spending his life waiting for invitations.

“Let’s spin to see who goes first.”

Dave agreed, reaching for the spinner and giving it a flick of the wrist. There was probably more to both of their histories, but. They had a lifetime to get through it all. And today was about Rose.

Rose’s nine beat out Dave’s six, and soon enough they were both on the way to retirement. Dave hit play on his DVD, letting it become background noise as their game progressed. Rose kept a relatively steady lead. She married a woman she named Camilla, explaining that they had met in a batting cage in New York and hit it off. She worked as an accountant while Camilla was in the NYPD forensic department. They had two adopted children, Derek- the same name he had called her on the first call; yeah, he noticed- and Janice, and had a condo in Manhattan. Rose ended up quitting her job after going to night school, instead opting to become an art teacher.

Dave wasn’t quite as creative. He did choose to marry a dude just to make Rose smile. She wrote his story as they went, too- Dave was a struggling entertainer and his husband, Karson, was a heckler at one of his shows. Karson was a stay at home Papa for their twins Roxanne and Jacob. They lived in a much more family friendly home, which Rose insisted was Mark’s idea after Dave was stupid enough to think they could live in a cheap apartment.

By the end of the game they had sat through three episodes of their anime and Rose was dubbed the winner. Dave already had another stack of games prepared, and he quickly got to work switching them out.

Two meals, six bathroom breaks, ten board games and four discs later they had exhausted Dave’s entire planned day. He figured that would be it, now they would just spend their evenings doing their usual and going to bed. But with a clatter of glass and the hiss of carbonation, he quickly realized that might not be the case.

Just a few moments after Dave had situated himself on the couch, there was a bottle of beer straight in his vision.

He looked up dumbfounded, but Rose was already chugging one herself, tears pricking her eyes. She pulled the bottle from her lips and inhaled quickly, giving her head a shake out.

“Come on. Beer before liquor, never been sicker.”

He tentatively grabbed the bottle from her, giving it a sniff and shuddering. “You do realize you’re breaking the law right now, right?”

Before he knew it she had flipped him off, quick to turn around and head back to the kitchen. “Shut up and drink.”

Despite his better judgment, he did as he was told. Wow, illegally consuming alcohol for the first time since New Years. He felt like an actual adult. He tried to down it quickly. If Rose’s saying held any water, she’d be bringing him a mixed drink soon enough. He didn’t want to start piling up a queue.

Sure enough she returned with two tequila sunrises, setting them down on the coffee table and quickly moving her way around the couch and to her room.

“We’re going to spend the night my way now,” she called back to him. On the one hand, he was worried to find out what exactly that meant. On the other, he was excited to find out what that meant.

When Rose returned she had shucked off her pants, and was carrying in her hands a DVD box set of _Squiddles!_ Not exactly what he would expect from Rose of all people, but. Okay.

“This is how you get drunk,” she insisted, clambering over the back of the couch to get to the TV.

He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t looking at her ass while she situated her first DVD.

When she sat back down, she refused to hit play until he was finished his beer. He chugged it despite the burning in his throat, and accepted the sunrise when she handed it off to him and clinked their glasses together.

He tried to nurse that drink as slowly as he could. But after it was finished, things were already a blur.

Rose offered a couple less-strong cocktails as they continued to watch her squiddles. She kept giving him play by plays of the episodes, eagerly explaining what was happening and what characters she loved and which ones she thought were total assholes. The drunker he got the more he was actually taking a liking to the show, actually listening to her ramble on about it.

“Ok but,” she insisted, crawling her way to the TV to slam a finger into the screen. “This pink bitch is literally. The worst, like there is no fucking contest. She’s so full of herself! It blows my mind.”

Dave nodded attentively, offering a gesture in her direction.

“Yeah like,” he agreed, “did you fucking see? When she was talking to that other one and she straight up just called her ugly.”

“That’s so mean,” Rose said quietly, giving a shake to her head. “So mean.”

The alcohol was wearing off as they piled up on the couch. Rose was still watching the TV, sprawled out on the couch and half across Dave’s lap, arms across his thigh to prop herself up. Admittedly he hadn’t been paying attention for awhile. He was mostly just watching her. The shimmer in her hair, the rise and fall of her shoulders, the curve in her back, the way she half propped up her calves and the way she wiggled her toes back and forth when she smiled or laughed. This was probably the closest he had ever gotten to her. And he liked it a lot.

The last episode of the disc ended and flipped back to the credit screen. Rose sloppily leaned forward to grab the remote, only muting the TV instead of turning anything off. Nothing but a soft glow of blue remained, and soon after she was rolling in her spot, resting her head directly in his lap and smiling up at him.

“I’m not drunk anymore,” she admitted, quick to slide a hand to her face. “I usually drink more until I just pass out but.”

Dave swallowed. “But what?”

“I don’t want to forget today. I always get drunk when I want to forget. I don’t want to forget this. All you did for me and the fun we had. I want to remember that.”

Once again he was stuck flushing, thankful for the low light of the room. When he had thought her answer might have been something like that, he forced himself to dismiss it. He was just being selfish. There’s no way she thought anything like that about him.

But she did, and here she was saying it.

Slowly she sat up, keeping her back turned to him for a long time. He looked for a couple moments, eventually turning away and waiting. Waiting for her to speak, waiting for her to leave. Whatever she chose to do. It was a long wait, but eventually there was a quiet, small, and breathy,

“ _Thank you._ ”

Dropping his head, Dave smiled to himself. Wide and proud and nervous. He was mostly just glad that he did it. He kept Rose happy when she needed to be kept happy. With a loud grunt of relief he slid his ass to the floor, lying down and spreading out on it. He stretched his arms, he stretched his legs, he stretched his toes.

“You are fucking welcome, Rose. I am _so_ happy to see you happy. I’m ecstatic to make you happy. I just want you to be happy. I want to help you be happy. And when you can’t be happy, I want to make sure you aren’t unhappy alone.”

His eyes were closed when heard the rustle of the couch cushions. The rest of her movements were silent, but when he looked again, she was on her hands and knees, hovering herself over him. He kept his gaze on her face, carefully exploring it. She blinked a couple times but otherwise was still, mouth not moving.

His heart was pounding. He could feel the heat from her face. Her knee had brushed against his hip, and he was stuck admiring the way her eyelashes looked laid out over her cheeks when she blinked. Her elbows were locked and her head sunk down between them, breasts hanging downward. When she next opened her eyes he glanced up into them. It was dark aside from the same gentle blue from the television.

Was he dreaming?

Then he felt it- the soft, almost cold brush of her lips against his. He stayed perfectly still, as if she were a butterfly that he’d scare off if he moved or breathed. His eyes darted back and forth, watching hers as they stayed shut. He could feel her eyelashes against his cheeks. She was that close. 

He almost didn’t feel it when she pulled back, ducking her head shyly and letting the tips of her hair brush over his neck. There was a small exhale as she seemed to laugh at herself, starting to pull back from him.

“Sorry, I--”

He moved his hand to the back of her neck, almost demanding in the way he held it down. He couldn’t bring himself to look into her eyes- just watched her lips as they froze mid-sentence and hung slightly open in surprise.

“Don’t ever be sorry.”

Instead of pulling her down he sat up, pushing himself up with one hand while he held onto her with the other. His head dove to kiss her again, and as he did a quiet whimper escaped her. She sat back, down and into his lap, but eagerly moved her arms around him to keep him close. His mouth opened to move his lips around hers, still cradling her head.

He tried to ignore it. The heat that was pooling between them where her crotch was pressed against his. The feeling of her breasts pushed against his chest. She almost seemed to be longing to get even closer, grinding down on him in what he wanted to assume was desperation. He was lost for thoughts and lost for words, holding himself up with his core so his arm could move around her. His fingers spread and sunk into the curve of her waist, and as his tongue boldly sunk forward, Rose’s met it with another quiet, choked moan.

He wanted to say it. Feeling her heart beat, holding her this close, his heart was pounding and everything he’d felt for Rose the past two months was bubbling up and exploding in his stomach and chest like flowers in bloom. He knew he shouldn’t, there was the smallest voice of reason telling him not to say it, but it was sitting on the tip of his tongue.

_I love you._

He was completely lost until he felt Rose’s hands on the sides of his face, pulling herself out of the kiss and dropping her forehead against his. Her breath was heavy and airy but even through it he heard her laugh, and it made him laugh a bit, too. Her eyes were still closed, but she was smiling. The biggest smile he had ever seen from her.

“I want to tell you so much, but I’m terrified,” she whispered, her thumb brushing back and forth across his cheek. “I’m honestly just. So happy that you’re here with me. It dumbfounds me how much you mean to me. Sometimes I worry about what things would be like if I had never met you.”

Her head backed off of his and she finally opened her eyes. Her hands left his face, one stroking along his neck and the other moving back to comb through his hair. He kept a hand on her back but loosened his grip on her head, instead shifting to curl a lock of her hair around his finger. He watched her gaze as it wandered around him, ultimately settling on his eyes.

“I’ve never felt so... Balanced with someone,” she continued, her voice still quiet. “Like they could ever need someone like me as much as I always needed them. But..."

“I do,” he answered.

Rose almost seemed to sigh in relief. There was a pain in it, and when she spoke he could hear it in her voice.

“Please stay with me,” she choked, a smile on her lips despite the gloss over her eyes.

Dave didn’t offer an audible response. He sat forward, forcing her back slightly. The tips of his fingers slipped just past the edge of her tank top, pulling it down just a fraction of an inch. He could hear her breath hitch as he pressed his lips against her breast, gentle and dry, over her heart. The slight tug at the back of his scalp encouraged him, and carefully and slowly he continued, both of his hands settling on her hips and sliding upward. She raised her arms, allowing him to toss the garment aside. She was quick to bend her arms behind her back, removing her bra just as fast.

Still lit by the same soft blue Rose leaned herself forward, easing Dave down onto his back and pulling off his shirt as she went. She rested on her forearms to kiss him again, grinning behind it when she felt his hands cup her breasts. Everything about Rose’s body was soft from her lips down to her skin, and Dave was dumbfounded. He couldn’t imagine a gentle body like this belonging to someone with such a strong and bold personality. It didn’t match up. But he loved it.

“I don’t think anyone’s ever been this careful with me,” she said quietly, maintaining an amused tone to her voice that made Dave flush a bit in concern.

“I figured you’d like to be treated as a human and not a toy,” he replied defensively, thumbing at her nipples and struggling to make eye contact. “But I mean. I’m the first timer here so I guess if you want it different...”

“No,” was her response, quick and straight. “We have plenty of time to get to that.” Shifting her body a bit, she gave him a quick peck to his lips. “It’s your first time, it should happen how you want it to.”

A couple fingers moved around to the back of her head and he was guiding her down to kiss him again, longer and sweeter this time. His hand explored more of her body, feeling the curve of her back and the sides of her waist. Pivoting his wrist, the pads of his fingers barely brushed her as his hand moved along her stomach. Just the tips of his fingers moved under the waistband of her panties, hesitantly and silently asking for permission through their kiss.

He expected her to just say something, but instead he felt her hand move over his. She matched up their fingers and with a bit of a push, he felt her guide his hand. He felt his heart jump when he felt it- warm and soft and... _Definitely_ wet. He was momentarily shocked that it was possible for Rose to get softer, but as she moved his hand, a quick, high pitched yell left her. It was enough she had to break their kiss, weakly dropping her head to his shoulder. She had completely halted, so Dave moved his finger on his own.

He brushed it again and this time she whimpered. Her fingers were curling into the carpet next to his shoulder. He moved it again.

“ _Ahh-!!_ "

His face was flushing. That was something he could stand listening to for the rest of his life. She lifted her head with a small smile, her face just as red as his.

“Gentle,” she whispered, eagerly kissing him again, rougher than before.

Advice taken he lightened his touches, and with Rose’s hand starting again to guide his speed she was soon steadily moaning against his lips, her hips in constant motion to grind herself down against his fingers. His chest kept twisting and it made him wince, but seeing her like this was driving him crazy in his own desire.

It wasn’t long after that she was shuddering in orgasm, a sharp inhale through her nose while every moan that escaped her poured into their kiss. She didn’t give herself any time to rest, letting go of his hand and slowly moving back along his legs. He was surprised (and highly aroused) to see her slip her fingers into her mouth, cleaning them off thoroughly with her tongue. He rested his head back as she moved down.

He was about to get it- his first ever blow job. And it wasn’t some girl in a washroom stall, it was Rose. He was already thinking about it- black marks from her lipstick at the base of his shaft and all over his head- shit, what did his face look like right now?

“Relax, alright?” She told him. He looked up for half a second, confirming her position as he felt his belt and pants loosen. He helped her pull everything down by hoisting up his butt.

“I have never felt more relaxed,” he insisted, practically sighing the words in absolute bliss. He almost wished he was sitting up, so he could watch comfortably and keep her encouraged with strokes to her hair. That’s how it always happened, right?

“Okay,” she said, something skeptical in her tone. “I’m going to start but remember to relax.”

Of course he would relax. It would probably be the most relaxing thing in the fucking universe. He was preemptively moaning, grinning to himself in ecstasy.

“Ro-Oh my _God!_ ”

Despite her warning he completely froze, color draining from him. That wasn’t a fucking blowjob at all.

It was cold and uncomfortable and holy _shit_ , Rose had a _finger_ in his _ass_. “I said to relax,” she sighed, exasperation evident. “Just relax.”

Even though he wanted to scream and go on about a million tangents, he just did as he was told. He took a deep breath, let his muscles loosen, closed his eyes, and soon enough, Rose’s finger was slowly moving, in and out. He tried to focus on breathing but mostly just held off, grunts of rejection soon melting into curious whimpers. The more he relaxed the better it definitely got, and by the time Rose was moving in a second finger, Dave was letting out actual moans.

There was some touch- something she was doing that was completely unlike anything he’d felt.

“R-Rose,” he choked, digging his head back as she hit it again, his entire body squirming. Before he knew it he was lifting his legs for her, fingers gripping the carpet. He heaved more moans, until his hips jerked upward. “No more... Please. It’s too much.”

She didn’t need to be told twice, pulling out instantly. Dave was significantly more capable of breathing once she did, though when she crawled back up his body and shot him an “I told you so” grin, he mostly just wanted to roll over and hide. He moved his hands to cover his face.

“Raincheck,” was her response.

Dave stayed hidden until he felt Rose’s fingers move around his dick. She gave it one tight pull that tugged another moan from him. It was then that he felt her heat again- she sat herself down in his lap, his member between her lips. He felt her fingers on the back of his neck, and she lifted up his head. He brought his body along with it, looking up at her as she flashed him another smile.

He rested his hands back on her hips. She kept hers on the side of his face.

Carefully she gave a roll of her hips, grinding down on him directly. A few more times and Dave’s brain was buzzing. His hands were quick to move down from her hips, grabbing at her ass in desperation. He lifted his head to rest on her shoulder, puffing out a short and weak “Can I please.”

“Yes.”

He didn’t waste anymore time, hoisting her up by her hips. She took the hint with another wide smile, sitting up on her knees so he could have his hands. He took hold of himself to aim, only pausing when he realized what he was about to do.

“Wait... Shouldn’t I. Put something on or-”

“Don’t worry about it,” she said quietly, pulling herself close to him again. “I‘ve got a patch. We’re fine.”

Dave’s heart was racing when she started lowering herself down again. His heart jumped, feeling her heat touch him like this. He honestly had no idea what to expect- being a virgin was bad enough. But when it came down to thinking about... How he felt about Rose? How much he really, _really_ fucking wanted to be with her, to come home from work and be able to kiss her, or to be able to lay on her chest and just cry and not have to feel like he  had to be the cool and flawless asshole he always tried to be because Rose didn’t expect that from him. All she wanted from him was for him to be there. Which wasn’t even a chore, because that’s what he wanted, too–

Rose kept moving lower, and the more he felt of her the more his thought process was falling apart. She was so tight and so warm and he was aching. This was as close as you could possibly get with another human being, and he wanted to get closer. When she was all the way in his lap his arms circled her, holding tight to the small of her back. He dropped her head against his shoulder, his shoulders raising as he tried to steady his breathing.

“Dave,” she whispered, carefully pressing her lips to the top of his head. “Are you okay?”

All he could manage was a nod. He wanted to say yes, yes he was okay, he was great. He was so happy he was doing this, especially with her, and that he loved her and wanted to do this every night, or something every night, or nothing every night, as long as he was doing it with her.

His breath hitched when he felt her hands on his face, once again tilting it up so she could look him in the eye. It was nerve wracking and it made him a bit scared, but he flashed her a smile and she returned it, pulling him up into another kiss. It was then that she started rolling her hips again, moaning into him while he desperately tried to keep his breathing quiet. But it wasn’t quiet- it was loud and obnoxious and he couldn’t stop it.

Rose was amazing. She felt amazing. He never wanted this to end. He kept kissing her, holding her tighter even as it made her laugh at him. She moved faster while her nails started biting into his back. He was getting desperate for more and as he did, his lips moved from hers down her jaw, down her neck, and along her collarbone, until his teeth were tight on her pulse. He sucked on the skin, letting the moans it pulled from her pour into his ears.

He was biting harder the closer he got to his climax, huffing and moaning into her neck as he started thrusting up into her. She almost seemed to slow herself, stroking his hair. She was so gentle and it made it worse. It made it so much worse.

He practically choked trying to keep himself silent when he came, spreading his fingers out against her back and pressing her closer to him. It took minutes for him to stop shuddering, finally opening his jaw and breathing heavily against her neck. She didn’t make him move until well after, when she finally sat up to take herself off of him.

Even after she stayed in his lap, smiling and keeping his forehead against hers. Dave caught his breath before he opened his eyes, stiffening a bit when he saw the mark on her neck and the dark color that was flooding to it.

“Shit,” he choked, moving a hand up to brush his thumb over it. “I’m sorry. I didn’t. Mean to do that.”

Rose knocked her head to the side slightly, flashing him a smile. “Don’t worry about it. Maybe it’ll get guys in class to leave me be.”

When she started to laugh again, he stayed silent. He smiled to himself, hid against her chest again, and just drank it in. The sound of her laugh, the way she smelled, how she looked lit up with blue, flushed and warm. And for a brief minute still pressed against her, all he could think about was how much better this would be if he could do this again while calling her his girlfriend.


	18. Chapter 18

Rose woke up with a long inhale, pulling her arms closer to her head only to squish herself further into her pillow. A familiar scent made her eyes gently open, slightly surprised to find herself back in her own bedroom.

She distinctly remembered falling asleep with Dave last night. They’d pulled on their shirts and underwear and he picked her up right after, letting her legs wrap around his waist while she went right back to kissing him. He carried her back to his room, they were grinding and making out until Dave revealed he was probably spent for the night, at which point she just kissed him and settled against his chest. That was where she fell asleep. 

It wasn’t all a dream, was it?

Sitting up in bed she reached to rub her eye, unwearied by the smudge of eyeliner that remained on her hand. Her hand moved down to where her neck met her shoulder, holding the spot gently as she got out of bed and onto her feet. She didn’t move her hand until she was standing in front of her mirror. Sure enough, the bruise he had left was still there. She definitely wasn’t dreaming. That happened.

She started grinning despite herself, dropping her head to watch her toes wiggle. She slept with Dave, and it was fucking incredible.

Bypassing pants, she left her bedroom. She was going to run to the washroom to wash her hands, but Dave was situated in the kitchen already dressed, sunglasses on while he stood at the stove. Smelled like eggs. Thank God.

She snuck up behind him and slid her arms around his waist, holding her face against his back and taking in his scent. A muffled “Good morning” followed, and she held onto him for a moment longer before stepping back to move to the sink. “I didn’t expect breakfast. I didn’t expect to wake up in my bedroom, either.”

Dave didn’t look up. He didn’t even smile, really. Rose eyed him, moving her hands under the tap, giving extra care to her nails.

“How are you feeling?”

He stalled for another minute, eventually moving his pan from one burner to another and grabbing the pepper.

“Fine.”

Was that all he had to say? Rose was biting on her lip now, flooding with worry. Why wasn’t he looking at her?

“I’m glad,” she tried, sneaking in front of him to grab a dishcloth to dry her hands. “Though I’m a little disappointed I didn’t manage to blow your whole world open, or anything.” She laughed, but she laughed alone. He didn’t crack a smile, or turn his head. Just dumped his breakfast on his plate and picked it up. He was about to walk back to his room, but Rose stopped him by saying his name.

“What?” he asked, stopping in his tracks and turning to look at her.

“Are you angry with me?”

It eased her nerves a bit how quick he was to respond, getting back to his more passionate and defensive tone.

“No, of course not. Don’t think that Rose, you’re fine.”

But it didn’t really ease her mind.

“Do you want to talk about last night?”

Finally he was smiling. But it seemed different. Almost melancholy. Reaching over, his hand landed firmly on the top of her head.

“It’s cool. Don’t worry about it, Rose. I know you sleep around a lot. It’s not a big deal.”

He didn’t wait for her response before he was back to walking away. Rose was left staring forward, drowning in disbelief. Her lips weren’t moving no matter how many words and protests flashed at her.

What the _fuck_ was that supposed to mean?

Did he honestly think she just slept with him because he was someone to sleep with? Did he ignore the things she said on purpose? This wasn’t her fault, right? She wasn’t falling short in being open with him. She tried to be, she thought she was succeeding. She told him about her mother, for fuck’s sakes, and he thought he was just another partner to put on her list? Or what? Was he trying to preserve the innocence of his precious virginity by acting like she had stolen it like an impure witch skank? As if he wasn’t grinding on her the whole time?

The entire suggestion was offensive, plain and simple. Her face was flushing in anger and embarrassment, and she was suddenly self conscious of her exposed legs. This was humiliating. Thank God he didn’t hang around to rub it in.

Worse yet, this probably meant that it didn’t mean anything to him, either. What, did he think because she was easy he could just fuck her whenever he wanted and have no obligations?

...Could he do that?

She gave her head a stern shake, marching her way right back to her bedroom. She threw an outfit together on her bed, swinging open her laptop and navigating her way to Pesterchum. Thank God he was online. She was in desperate need of a second opinion. And... Comfort. But without Jade here, and when Dave was the fucking problem, she had to dig a bit deeper. Normally she would just brood but this... This hurt, and it was making her head spin. And after all of Dave’s influence, she wasn’t sure how to keep things bottled up anymore.

 

\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 9:06 AM --

TT: Forgive me for sending this with zero notice and so early on a Sunday, but I was just wondering.  
EB: ?  
TT: Would you like to grab a coffee with me? My treat, at Jamie’s?  
EB: rose, please.  
EB: i have been asking you to get coffee with me since the first day you messaged me.   
EB: there is no way that it is your treat.  
TT: I probably should have known you would say that.  
EB: i’ll be there in ten.  
TT: See you soon. Just look for the black lipstick.

\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 9:14 AM --

 

A deep breath later and she was nodding her head affirmatively. So it probably wasn’t the wisest decision to go meet a stranger she had met online at a coffee shop alone. But she had been talking to John for as long as she had been talking to Dave, really. He was posting fliers to find a discussion partner and she just so happened to be intrigued enough to tear his number off the tab. John was big on conspiracy theories, with a special interest in “alternative creationism,” as he called it. 

He had built a rather extensive explanation for life, including alien involvement and alternate universes all living in the same dimension. Obviously she found it all hard to believe, but the extent of the world he had built was so intriguing she couldn’t help but take an interest. After all, just because he was writing religion and she was writing fiction, didn’t mean they weren’t both writers at the end of the day.

Her outfit was sloppy and her makeup was half-assed, but she figured John would be much easier to impress compared to. Well. Anyone she had ever tried to court. She also had a time limit, so there really wasn’t the option to fuss it.

Heading for the door, she found herself stalling. The entire apartment was silent. Dave wasn’t making a sound. Looking over her shoulder, she momentarily considered that hey, she should probably leave him a note. Tell him she was going out, ask him if he needed anything from the store, if he wanted a coffee. But she didn’t do any of it. She slipped on her shoes and grabbed her keys. Then she left, locking the door behind her.

The café she chose was one her and John had decided on weeks ago. Rose liked it for the poetry readings, John liked it because the hookah lounge was right next door. Of course usually he visited there first and then came for the poetry readings. They had mused about whether or not they had seen each other there before by chance, but John refuted the suggestion. He insisted that he was positive they had known each other well in their past lives, and after 20 years, he was more than capable of seeing the scar he left on auras that he had encountered during that life.

Which was apparently, how he was planning on seeking her out today, if his weeks of promising such were to be believed.

The moment she opened the door the first thing she heard was a clatter. A hand on her purse she looked over to where a rather large and dark skinned male was fumbling with a napkin, to wipe up where he had seemingly spilled his coffee.

Somehow, that was absolutely enough for Rose and with the clack of her heels, she headed right over to him and draped a hand over the chair opposite him.

“Need any help?”

She flashed the guy a smile but he didn’t look up, shaking his head with a quiet, “No, no.” Eventually he looked up as he started a thank you, but froze mid sentence as he saw her face.

“Wait. Black lipstick, blonde hair-” His gaze shifted for a second, flashing to just left of her. That’s when he grinned, showing off an untreated overbite though still well kept, white teeth.

“Oh yeah, you’re definitely Rose.” The way he reached toward her almost made her shrink back, but he only wiggled his finger next to her arm. “There’s my mark. I knew we were friends in our last life! Way too short for you to have been my girlfriend though. Too bad.”

She couldn’t help herself when she laughed a bit, trying her best not to flash him any looks of disbelief. He was completely engrossed in this world of his and it would be way too disrespectful for her to at not at least humor him.

“Do I have any others?” she asked, pulling her chair back to take a seat. Seemed like she didn’t need to bother with introductions. She knew him well enough from their messages online, after all.

“Yeah!” he answered eagerly, being very subtle with his pointing. “There’s a big gash by your shoulder that was probably a lover. Heads right to your heart so it was probably a big deal. It’s kind of a dark green. And there’s one closer to your neck that’s pretty long too that’s red. Mine of course is there... And a different shorter green one next to your hip. You got some little ones here and there that were probably acquaintances but they’re so small I can’t really tell their color.”

“And their color denotes who they were, correct?” A polite smile was met with a bright one from him, and he was sliding over a cup of tea as soon as her hands were situated on the table.

“Yep. Mine’s blue. Has been on everyone I’ve marked. Got you Earl Grey. You told me that was your drink.”

She was taken aback- she certainly didn’t think he would memorize her drink order and have it ready for her arrival. The thought was... Really sweet. She could feel the bit of blush on her face but didn’t acknowledge it.

“It is. Thank you, John.” It was odd to say his name, but he lit up as soon as she did.

“You’re welcome, Rose!”

It was only a few sips of her drink later that John was off on his tangent. Arms animated as he talked about a previous life and another universe and an alien planet. Copies of memories that dead souls could wander in that he theorized were what created the world they were in now. He even scribbled things on napkins. GCAT, a planet with two moons, an elaborate creature he referred to as the king of a chess game.

Rose found herself getting lost in it. The writer in her was in love with every word he said. She could see it- her and John fighting alongside with alien companions- this lover that could have very well been an alien herself. She was never overly passionate about science fiction, but this was different. This felt real and familiar and she was hanging on his every word.

He didn’t stop talking until he went to sip his drink, apparently forgetting that he had spilled it before she arrived.

“Do you need another?” She asked, already pulling up her purse from where it was hanging off her chair.

“Yes, but stay put! You’re not paying for me, Rose. No matter how much you try.”

He was gone in an instant, and she practically beamed watching his back. She quietly chuckled to herself as she pulled her phone from her pocket. It had already been over an hour since she had gotten here. And as she expected, Dave had texted her. No doubt worried about where she had gone, or wondering what he did wrong, or apologizing.

 

DAVE STRIDER [10:42AM]: if you do laundry today take mine pls

 

Or not. Her head pulsed and her vision clouded in anger. All of John’s influence was pouring out of her and suddenly all that was left was how miserable she was over Dave’s sudden change of heart. Treating her like some slut that he just so happened to be the next in line for, acting like what happened between them was all her fault and her desires that she had forced him into. 

Did she force him into it?

He had told her before that he had nothing against her sex life. That was him being genuine. But he still acted like it was some accident, like he had just fallen inside of her because she slept around so often. It was gross and immature and rude.

Rose swallowed over a dry throat. She had barely noticed her eyes completely lose focus as she watched her hand. She inhaled sharply as soon as she realized she had spaced out. Looking up, John had already taken his seat, but he was just sitting across from her quietly, stirring his drink with a small, toothy smile.

“Sorry,” she breathed, stroking back her hair. She tried to push up her demeanor, be mature and calm and above-it-all. But the more she tried the weaker she felt, and soon she was back to slumping, blinking her eyes to avoid the stinging feeling that came along with tears. She didn’t want to be that girl who cried over a guy on a café table.

“Don’t be sorry,” John told her, pausing only to take a drink. “I know something serious must have happened, or else you wouldn’t have contacted me. It’s alright, Rose. Take your time.”

Rose’s vision continued to blur, her heart painfully clenching at the sound of his words and the softness of his tone. Her seat made the slightest of noises as she completely slumped forward, her head hanging down while her hands gripped at the back of her neck and tugged at her hair. She was so lost, so confused, so scared. Everything came spilling out, from Jade leaving to Dave showing up in her apartment, their music, her book, his manuscript, them having sex. John listened, nodded, shrugged, drank.

“I don’t know what I did wrong,” she said finally, avoiding eye contact. “I thought I was as honest as he wanted me to be. But he still thinks...”

“Hey,” he interrupted, making her look up from her pity party with moist, reddened eyes. “It’s great that you’re looking for where your mistake was, since that’s a totally noble thing or whatever, but you should also keep in mind the possibility that he is the one who fucked up, here. You’re a writer, Rose, and sometimes it’s hard to switch off that thing that writers do where they see the world as a plot that always works out in the end or a character that has a reason behind every action. But sometimes in the real world shit just goes haywire because people are idiots.”

It was an interesting perspective, to say the least. Was she really viewing this from a writer’s standpoint instead of a human’s? It certainly would explain why she was searching for cause and effect to all of Dave’s actions. But John was right. Humans weren’t characters. Sometimes they didn’t have a backstory to excuse what they did.

“Maybe he’s just being a jerk.”

Rose stayed silent, glancing up at John while he drank and people watched. After a few moments he was back to making eye contact, shrugging.

“I’m not saying he’s some irredeemable person that you should never speak to again but. Sometimes people just. Make mistakes. And as selfless as it is to search for your mistakes first... It’s not always going to be something that you did. He consented, you paid attention to his nerves and stuff, so... I don’t know, Rose. I just think you are maybe being too hard on yourself.”

Maybe she was? Maybe Dave had just been shoving down her throat since they moved in together that she was the problem, and maybe she just couldn’t believe anything else anymore. No, no, she didn’t want to undo her progress. She caused a lot of problems. That didn’t suddenly stop being true because Dave was now causing one. She was changing and growing. This wasn’t about the past. This was about now. The now being that Dave either believed, or wanted to make it seem like he believed, that Rose only slept with him because she liked sex, and this inconvenienced him. 

“I know I should... Ask him. I mean, ever since he said that I’ve been going over all the possible things it could have meant. Is he upset because he thinks I don’t genuinely have feelings for him? Does he think I slept with him ‘just because’ when he slept with me because of genuine feelings that he has for me, and he wants me to know that it’s alright that I hurt him? But that would mean I didn’t say enough when it was happening. I tried to tell him. I tried to tell him how much I cared.”

“That’s all you can do, though,” John insisted, his knuckles knocking against the wood. “You tried then, he may not have picked up on the message. It’s not the end of the world! You guys just need to talk it over and straighten out any confusions so he knows you do like him and it wasn’t a just because thing. Maybe he’s one of those paranoid types that thinks no one could ever love him? I’m telling you, this is all on him.”

Everything seemed so much easier when John was explaining it. Just looking at his bright expression made her relax, and she eased into a smile. She leaned forward in her seat, glancing at him almost apologetically as she rubbed her face.

“I know,” she told him, not even realizing how quiet her voice had gotten. “I know we just need to talk. He taught me that.”

Her eyes started to water again. The café sounded almost silent. All she could feel was the clenching weight in her chest. She swallowed once, twice, but her throat just felt more dry than before. The words were pushing up her throat, even as she fought hard to keep them down. Eventually, practically whispering, she let them escape.

“It just hurts.”

The smile on her face felt so fake. She gave a nod when she looked John in the eye, sniffling when he reached over to wipe her eyes.

“It hurts that he would... Assume that of me. And I know I deserve it, I’ve been treating people this way my entire life. But if this is some sort of... Test? So I know how it feels? So I stop acting this way? I get it. I passed. I’m ready for it to stop.”


	19. Chapter 19

“ _FUCK!!_ ”

Dave’s shoulders heaved. His heart was racing and with every beat another flash of red crossed his vision. He stared down at his bookshelf, overturned on the floor where he had thrown it down in anger. Eventually he swallowed, slumping and stumbling back until he bumped into his mattress, collapsing on it with a loud _sprung._

Dave had fucked up. Oh, he had colossally fucked up. 

Spending the day with Rose when she needed it was good. Having a couple casual drinks was good. Spending an hour or so drunk was good! Having sex with Rose? Way, way too good. His post-coital panic attack though? Not so much.

He was into it when Rose came back to his bedroom with him. He enjoyed a bit more making out even if the exhaustion of his first time left him a bit unable to perform. It’s not like Rose teased him about it. She just kissed him softly again and went right to sleep. At first he was on over the moon, stroking her hair and shoulders and listening to her breathing slow as she drifted off. It was warm and familiar and it made his heart ache with hope. Hope that it never ended, hope that they could be together, hope that just sex could be a bit more meaningful.

He tried to sleep next to her. He honest to God tried to. But his mind just raced. Anxieties started to pile up. What was he going to do if Rose cheated on him like his ex did? It’s not like she wasn’t already sexually open. No, don’t think that about her, she’s different. But is she really? Had he known her long enough? What would happened to their living arrangement if they broke up?

He lay awake for hours until it became too much. And carefully he climbed out of bed, scooping Rose up and carrying her back to her room. He tucked her in, he contemplating kissing her. But he left in silence, returning to his room and struggling- fighting to fall asleep. To stop worrying. He wanted to be with her. That was enough to try, even if something went wrong in the end. It wasn’t the end of the world. It wasn’t. It wouldn’t be.

Morning came around after only two measly hours of rest. He only got out of bed because of his hunger. He had planned to make food and go right back to bed, but Rose interrupted him. And it went all downhill from there.

He didn’t know what to say. Was it even appropriate to spout out your love for someone after you slept with them? He didn’t know the etiquette here. Rose seemed casual about it, but of course she was. This was her usual. She wasn’t the one thinking about relationships or love or dating. Rose was the type who could just have sex. And there was no way that after barging into her home and overturning her entire life... That she could ever see him romantically. No way. He was nothing but a fucking loser.

His mind was racing when she was talking to him, but he was too scared to say anything that was on it. How could he? What if it freaked her out? Then she said it. Let’s talk about last night. Dave panicked.

He just told her that it was okay and he understood. What did that even mean? He fucking choked at the most crucial moment, and now Rose was gone without a trace or a note, and not answering her text messages. She was back to her old habits, and this time, Dave couldn’t even fault her on it. How could he? He practically did the exact same thing to her. This time, it was his fault.

He needed to fix this. He needed to do what he had been teaching her to. He had to own up, regardless of how embarrassing it was. Lead by example, be open and honest. Humiliate himself, put himself on the line. He had to do it. There wasn’t an option anymore. Whatever came next... He would just have to deal with.

He stood from his bed with a sigh, bending down to pick up his bookshelf and reorganize his things, wincing at the sight of smashed jars and puddles of formaldehyde. That’d need to get cleaned up fast. Good think he had some of that damn chemical geller on hand. He tore open packet after packet, sprinkling it on the spill before grabbing the broom, all the while mumbling to himself to write his speech.

“Look, Rose. About earlier. No- Not earlier. Yesterday. Last night. Yeah. Forget earlier, that was. That was just me being an idiot. You know me. I can’t tell which way’s up on the best of days. I mean obviously I’m just saying that since I’m damn near perfect, but- fuck. No. I messed up. I kinda choked and I got anxious and I said something really insensitive to you as a result and. I’m sorry. It’s just that...”

He paused, spacing out as his body moved to auto pilot, dumping out his dustpan into the garbage and starting to collect what made it out alive.

“It’s just that I. Don’t really know how to handle this. I mean. Forget being a virgin, that shit is old news. We’ve gone over that. Doesn’t even matter anymore. I’m. I’m worse than a virgin. I’m like. Tainted. My only serious relationship ended with me getting cheated on. And don’t get me wrong here I’m not-fuck-I’m not trying to suggest that you liking sex makes me think that you’re going to che- wait. Fuck. I didn’t even say I fucking liked you yet.”

He breathed out a chuckle, dropping his forehead against the end of the broom handle. Oh, this was going to be _great_.

By the time his mess was cleaned up he had gone silent. Moved back to his bed and just laid still. Staring up at the ceiling, listening to his own breathing. If he got a hold of his anxiety, he could do this. He just needed to not over think it. Apologize, confess, explain. Apologize, confess, explain. That’s all there was to it.

When he sat himself down on the couch, he could feel his hands shaking. He sat back and stalled, laid down and stalled, covered his eyes and stalled. He wouldn’t apologize over the phone. No way was he going to do that. He would just call and see where she was- when she’d be back. That’s all. Then when she got home he would tell her everything. Then maybe after all of that...

They could actually be together?

His thumb was firmly between his teeth as he hit call, worriedly gnawing when he held the phone up to his ear. He was getting more and more anxious with every ring. After four rings he was convinced she was letting him go to voice mail. Or maybe if he was lucky, just happened to be in a movie or something that forced her phone to stay on silence. But after the fifth ring, she picked up. At first all he heard was laughing. Rose was laughing. There was chatter, too. She must have been in public.

“Hello?"

Dave hesitated, but managed to squeak out a nervous, “Rose?”

“Dave?” She had started shouting. Probably trying to hear him over the crowd. “Dave is everything alright?”

He stayed quiet. He listened to her as she spoke to someone else for a moment before calling his name again. He sunk lower on the couch cushion, just listening.

“I think I lost him. Dave? Are you there?”

It was honestly shocking how long it took her to hang up. But even after she did he kept the phone held up. Maybe she’d try to call back. Maybe she would text him to see what he needed.

The ticking of the clock made him feel worse. There was nothing. No message. He dropped his phone on the floor before rolling onto his side, cushioning his head under his hands and staring at the black television screen.

It was stupid to feel discouraged by this. Who cared if Rose was out with someone? Rose had friends. She was allowed to have friends. She was definitely allowed to go talk to them after the shit he pulled. Why the fuck was he jealous? Because literally anyone could sweep her off her feet at any moment during the primetime of his colossal fuck up? Not even girls were safe with Rose. Literally anyone could win against him.

Closing his eyes he let his mind wander, willing himself to relax. Anyone could win, sure, but that didn’t mean they were going to. He could fix this. Rose had to at least be somewhat interested in him, right? She slept around, yeah, so that didn’t necessarily mean anything. But she also talked to him about tons of shit, and let him read her book, and played music for him. That had to mean something. Maybe it was just a friendship something? But... Did that really matter in the long run? It’d be disappointing sure, but not the end of the world. Even as friends, he’d be close to her.

He didn’t notice that he‘d dozed off until he heard voices and footsteps. Slowly opening his eyes he groggily looked across at the kitchen. He could see the back of Rose as she sat propped against the table, talking to a second person across from her. He couldn’t make out what they were saying, but his compulsion to know practically pushed up into sitting up. It was slow but he made it, reaching up a hand to push up his bangs. He probably had one hell of a mark on his nose falling asleep with glasses on.

“Your roommate’s awake,” said the guy, lifting a beefy arm to gesture toward Dave. Dave half hoped the practical death glare he shot could be chalked up to being from just waking up.

Rose turned around in an instant, making her way around the kitchen table and into the living room, sitting herself down on the coffee table.

“Hey, don’t get up,” she said, reaching over and putting her hand against his chest. Her fingers felt like fire and he found himself relaxing. Thank God she was here. Thank God Rose was here. “You were burning up when we got back,” she told him, moving a hand to his neck. “You still feel hot so just stay lying down, alright?”

With a slow nod he started to lay back down, his eyes never leaving the concern on Rose’s face. He did start to feel uneasy though, when the guy she had brought home started to approach and dropped a hand on her shoulder.

“Do you want me to get anything? I can run down to the store."

“No.”

Both of them turned to look at Dave. He was already starting to sit back up, even as Rose held firm onto his shoulder.

“Dave,” she whispered, still pressing against him. “It’s alright.”

“I don’t need your help!”

Rose’s hand moved away and Dave was up on his feet, stumbling as he stood. He definitely did have a temperature. Did it have anything to do with the formaldehyde? He should be telling Rose about the spill so she could look it up. Just in case. But he didn’t want to. He looked at her friend through thin eyes. The guy seemed to be surveying him- examining his body. He looked between Dave and Rose before smirking, showing off some really bad teeth.

“Dave, this is John.. He’s a friend of mine I met a couple months ago... I just invited him back after grabbing some coffee...”

John seemed polite, but in a dickish condescending way. He was smiling, but it looked more like a sneer in Dave’s eyes. It was a challenge. An invitation.

“Here’s a cool fact,” John started, one of his arms wrapping around Rose so he could wiggle a finger near her arm. “Your guys’ auras have matching scars. You two were related in your last life!”

The room went dead silent. Rose looked mortified, her face flushing while her eyes awkwardly moved away from both of them. Dave was embarrassed too, swallowing around the knot that was forming in his throat. Who the fuck did this guy think he was? Dave tried to smirk, looking at Rose and pointing a thumb at John.

“Guess this guy doesn’t know about us, huh? What an ass.”

He tried to walk away, nearly falling backward when a rush to his head sent him stumbling. He heard Rose call his name again but he just waved a hand, making his way down the hallway and into his room. Probably not the safest place knowing he was currently suffering from formaldehyde exposure, but who the fuck cared.

Pretty sure he had bigger problems, if he fucked his past-life sister.

He scoffed as he collapsed onto his mattress, letting his vision go black. There was no fucking way he was going to let a tool like John win Rose from him. Not a damn chance.


	20. Chapter 20

“Do you see what I was talking about now?”

Rose fell back to her seat, hands shooting up to cradle her head while her tongue clicked in frustration. Not only was Dave being confusing and indecisive, he was being an ass. He had done a complete 180 overnight, and for the life of her, she couldn’t figure out what might be causing it. Obvious answer would say it was her fault for sleeping with him. But he was so vocal and enthusiastic and tender. Did it really mess with him that much?

“Yeah,” John answered, finding a seat across from her on the couch and rearranging the pillow that they had moved under Dave’s head before. “I’m sorry, Rose. I shouldn’t have said anything. It was pretty obvious that he was being hostile.”

She flashed him a smile, exasperated and so, _so tired_. But John was nice and understanding and she couldn’t even begin to vocalize how much she needed that right now.

“Don’t blame yourself. You just wanted to share fascinating news. Honestly, I wouldn’t have expected him to react this way. He seemed melancholy this morning. Maybe I upset him by not answering his messages.”

“I guess there isn’t really anyway to know unless you ask him,” John mused, scratching at the stubble across his jaw. “If you want I can take off for now and we can meet up some other time. I don’t want to impose on you if you have stuff to work out, or whatever.”

“No,” she answered, leaning forward until she was up on her feet. She moved herself up on the couch with slow, tired movements, turning to face him, slipping an arm around his and moving to lay down, cuddled up at his side. She kept her eyes closed, willing away the oncoming headache. “He’ll be useless until he comes to me. If I try now, it’ll only end up in a screaming match.”

Rose could hear his exhale when he smiled. She didn’t have to see it to see his face. It was a comforting thought, and it was relaxing. Maybe it was a relatively clean slate with John that made him seem like the only buoy in her current ocean storm. Either way she was clinging onto him, and despite the pressure the couch back was putting on her elbow, and the way his arm hair tickled at her face, she stayed.

“Is there anything I can do to make you feel better, though?” He offered, his voice quiet and hushed. “I could make some tea, or close the blinds.”

Rose hummed a negative. No, right now she just wanted company. Company that she didn’t have to tiptoe around or worry about upsetting, or wonder about her future with.

“Okay.”

Much to her surprise, Rose didn’t fall asleep. John didn’t ask to move, either. He toyed around on his phone with his free hand, talked very little, and didn’t stir more than to kick off his shoes. At one point he lifted his shirt as he scratched his stomach, hand moving to his chest. At first she was rather surprised at how smooth his skin seemed to be (he definitely wasn’t the type to wax), but her eyes caught sight of the matching scars across either side of his chest and she understood.

She tried to think of something to say. Listening to John’s quiet snickers while he scrolled through whatever website he was on was calming, but she could only imagine that it had to be awkward for him. But after so much time not speaking, it almost seemed weird to imagine vibrations in her throat or the sound of her own voice.

“What are you looking at?” She finally tried, only pulling away a couple inches to see his face. He was grinning- wide and toothy. He seemed startled to hear her, but flashed her the screen of his phone nevertheless.

“Just something on Cracked. I’ve read funnier, but, you know.”

Not really a topic she was interested in. She snuck a peek at the time when he pointed the screen toward her. It’d been forty minutes and there still hadn’t been a sound from Dave’s room. She tried not to sigh when she sat up, arms noticeably chilled when she let go of John’s arm.

“I should probably go check on him. Make sure he doesn’t still have a fever.”

“Okay,” was his answer, still thumbing at his phone.

She probably owed him an apology. Not meeting up with him for months just to drag him to her apartment and make him sit in silence for an hour. Maybe she could find him a video game, or offer to cut his hair, or something. Regardless it would have to wait. She fingered through her hair to tame it before she moved through the hall, knocking quietly on Dave’s door before opening it.

She couldn’t even finish quietly calling his name before she was hit in the face with a foul stench. It made her face recoil and a hand shoot up to cover her nose. Did he spill something? Rotten food? Regardless Dave had his window open, seemingly to air the room out. He was laying face up on the mattress, and Rose could just barely see the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed.

“Dave?”

He didn’t answer, but his inhale did get slightly louder. Damn it, she was probably just going to wake him up. Instead she kept quiet, moving over to stand next to his bed. She crouched a little to get closer to him, carefully reaching for his form. She slid a hand up under the hem of his shirt, pressing the back of it against his chest. He definitely still had a fever. But it didn’t seem to be any worse than before. A relief at least.

She could only assume the sudden sickness had something to do with whatever smoke bomb he’d let off in here. She could already feel it stinging slightly at her eyes. He really shouldn’t be staying in here while the room wasn’t completely aired out. Fuck.

Her hands moved to his shoulders, and she gave him a stern shake. “Dave, wake up.”

This time his inhale was sharp, eyes shooting open and darting around for whatever was disturbing him. He looked like a kitten the way he rubbed at them with the heels of his palms, but that only served to confirm that his eyes were getting irritated being in here, too. “What, what?”

“What happened in here? It smells chemical.” She made sure to keep her voice firm- so he was well aware she expected an answer and no childish back and forth bullshit.

He snuffed a bit, closed his eyes again, rolling slightly onto his side. “I broke one of my jars. It’s no big deal. The room’ll vent out.”

This idiot. She stood tall-as tall as she could, at least- putting her fists on her hips. “You mean one of your jars with preserved creatures in it. As in, a jar full of formaldehyde, as in, a _known carcinogen._ Dave, get up. If you want to sleep you can sleep in my room.”

“Calm down. I’m not going to get cancer from a cup of mummy juice.”

“You’re right,” Rose scoffed, words and tone licking with as much sarcasm as she could muster with so much energy devoted to swallowing down her distress. “I forgot you were professionally trained for the handling of dangerous chemicals while _also_ being a licensed doctor and expert on cancerous agents. Dave, get out of bed, or I’m going to make John carry you out.”

That seemed to get Dave’s attention. He was back to facing her in an instant, sitting up right after.

“He’s _still_ here?”

That tone was so bitter, so borderline _jealous_. Rose really hoped, for Dave’s sake, that this wasn’t a matter of jealousy. She really hoped this wasn’t about Dave being jealous of Rose for having a male friend.

Either A, Dave only considered men as viable competition, making a mockery of her sexuality, or B, Dave was now more possessive just because they had slept together. Which was just _dripping_ with the possibility that he respected her body more than her.

She tried to shove it all down. Now wasn’t the time. It could be added to the list of things to talk with him about. Later, after his fever was down, and when they were alone. Not now.

“Yes, he is, because I asked him to stay with me. The past 24 hours have been stressful for me, Dave, and since you’re offering me no support and Jade just buried the only family she has, I’m scraping up whatever I can. Will you _please_ just come sleep in my room.”

Fuck. She choked a bit. Her eyes were watering. Was that the chemicals or was this actually just upsetting her that much? She wiped at her face with a bit of a growl in her throat. Was that starting to sting, too?

Dave got to his feet. He raised a hand, gesturing toward the door. She made her way toward it, gasping for breath the moment she was back out in the hall. Dave didn’t speak again. He didn’t acknowledge John, even when he asked how Dave was feeling.

Rose’s door shut behind Dave as he disappeared. She continued to wipe at her eyes and rub her throat. John half stood but she waved at him, motioning for him to sit back down.

“He spilled formaldehyde,” she informed him, half laughing as she stumbled her way to the sink, turning on the tap to start wetting her eyes. “No big deal.”

“Didn’t get anywhere though,” John mused, putting his phone away. “He’s got a pretty intense alpha male air about him, I gotta say.”

“I know,” she answered, picking up a tea towel to dab at her eyes. “But he never used to. When he first moved in he was probably the most caring and least obnoxious person I had ever met. I don’t know what’s happened in the past 24 hours. I mean aside from us sleeping together, obviously. I’m a little scared that that’s the reason why.”

John answered with a thoughtful hum, crossing one leg over the other. “It could be. But I think that it is probably not in the way that you are inclined to think!”

That certainly caught her attention. She made her way back into the living room, eagerly taking a seat on the coffee table again to face him.

“I am more than open to suggestions.”

“Well,” he started, leaning back slightly. “It seems to me that where you might be thinking that because of what you guys did he thinks differently of you or your intentions, he’s probably just a little caught off guard and possibly scared about what this means for your whole arrangement and relationship.”

He certainly pegged her perfectly. It was a little embarrassing if she had to admit, but it made her smile knowing that he understood her so well. It made explaining herself a lot easier when the person she was talking to was already on the same page.

“I don’t think he thinks you’re some hussy or out to take advantage of him. He probably just doesn’t know what to expect from here on out and he wants to be a step ahead of it so there aren’t any surprises. Which, is why he shut you down this morning! So he could be already let down before you had a chance to let him down, if by any chance that is what you were planning on doing.”

Her shoulders slumped when she exhaled, her gaze moving into her lap. He definitely was making a lot of sense. Maybe she wasn’t giving Dave enough credit assuming he was just jealous of John. Maybe it wasn’t jealousy so much as fear of being replaced. Fear that sex was as far as it was going to go and now his arc was over. Maybe he did want to be with her, but didn’t want to risk rejection to try and get that to happen.

“Then... How he acted when we got home,” she mumbled, moving to pull up her knees before she heard the table creak under her. She put her feet back down, shuffling them across the carpet in idle thought. “Just normal intimidation. No funny business. Not some possessive jealousy.”

John shrugged his shoulders and for the first time that day, Rose felt a pang of uncertainly looking in his eyes. He had written an entire world and was sure of himself and his beliefs no matter how absurd they got, passionately speaking about them without any retractions or opportunity for correction or uncertainty. But right now, he couldn’t even assure her that Dave wasn’t trying to own her.

“You have to talk to him, dude,” was his response. But he was right. He rubbed at his thighs a few times, blowing air through vibrating lips. “I can only tell you what I think. I’m not him and neither are you.”

She nodded. He was absolutely right. If she was being honest, he was giving her the same advice that Dave had given her time and time again. Don’t assume, don’t rush, don’t react. Just talk. That’s what she had to do now.

“It would be a lot easier done if he was a little more cooperative,” she muttered, rubbing the back of her neck. John got to his feet, seemingly checking the time on his phone before he started to shimmy past her.

“Don’t stress so much, Rose. It’s only been a day. He’ll talk! You’ve got time. I’m really sorry, but I have to go to work. Text me if you need me, okay?”

He really had to leave already? She tried to swallow back her anxiety and disappointment, just getting to her feet and escorting him the five steps it took to get to her door.

“Absolutely,” she promised, pulling herself against him to kiss his cheek. “Thank you so much for today. You’re a lovely friend.”

She didn’t miss the pink sprinkled on his cheek when she pulled back, trying not to smirk too knowingly. Last thing she wanted to do was tease him.

“Anytime, Rose. You’re a great friend, too, and I know it’s this is only going to get greater. I’ll talk to you tonight!”

The door opened and shut, and he was gone as fast as he had come. She stayed close to the door, dropping her forehead against it. Now she was back to being alone. She couldn’t talk to Dave with the chemical spill in the way- he was just acting delirious and irrational. It would all have to wait. But she wasn’t really sure what she could be doing in the meantime.

She didn’t want to go into her room to grab anything to work on. She wasn’t ready for another confrontation, should Dave still be awake. It could wait. Instead she sprawled herself out on the couch, tugging down the throw from the back and tossing it across her legs and over her shoulder. She lazily picked up the remote from the floor, scrolling through the guide until she found something- anything to watch that she could fall asleep to.

Half an hour into a romcom later and she was still awake, mind positively racing. What if he really did want to be with her?


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fair warning that rape is discussed for about ten words. After the italicized "Oh my God" and before Rose apologizes. Probably nothing to worry about, but just in case.

Rose’s bedroom was dark when Dave woke up. His headache had completely subsided, and he felt sort of... Relaxed. He had curled himself around Rose’s blanket, nose hidden in the fabric as he took in her scent breath after breath. He closed his eyes, imagining her in his arms, the way it should be. The way it could be. If he wasn’t so terrified of letting it.

Taking advantage of her bed for only a few more minutes he eventually rolled out, rubbing at his still-sore eyes, scratching at his scalp, and adjusting his pants from where they had twisted around his legs and hips in his sleep. When he left the room the living room was dark, too, aside from the glow of the TV and the one light above the sink in the kitchen.

Seeing Rose seated on the couch was probably the most relieving thing he could imagine, at that moment. Just knowing she close by was comforting. He let himself smile for the smallest moment before he approached behind her, leg by leg throwing himself up on the back of the couch and sitting up on it. Rose seemed startled to say the least but she was silent, the charger from her laptop strung up in her mouth where she was lightly chewing on it as she typed up a document.

“You’re awake,” she said, tone still rather matter-of-fact. She seemed a little flustered when she moved to get the cord out of her mouth, letting it fall across her lap. She lowered her screen when she turned to look at him, offering up a sympathetic smile. “How are you feeling?”

“Better,” he assured her, voice still low and rough from the sleep. He lifted a hand to rub at his shoulder idly. “I’m guessing the fumes were getting to me.”

“Well no shit,” she scoffed, smiling through it to Dave’s relief. “As long as your fever is gone you’ll probably be fine. How did you spill so much of it anyway?”

“I uh.” Not like he could tell her the truth. _Oh Rose I was having a huge temper tantrum because you went out without telling me after I literally pushed you away with all my might._ Yeah, that would go over well. “I was just rearranging some things and I managed to knock them down. That’s what I get for reaching for the top shelf instead of dragging over a step stool.”

She seemed satisfied with that. Shrugged her shoulders and turned back to her laptop. She didn’t say anything. The room grew silent aside from the hum of the fridge and the quiet mumbling of a half-muted Ricky Gervais on the television. He had to say more. He didn’t even apologize yet. But how much was he going to apologize for? Snapping at her? Being an asshole about her friend? Avoiding the post-coital discussion? _Lying_ about not being interested? How far back was he even ready to go this early?

No, he didn’t get to choose how much Rose deserved to hear. She deserved to know everything. She was a person with feelings and he had no right to manipulate them.

_Apologize, confess, explain._

“Rose I,” he started, swallowing down the lump in his throat and avoiding her gaze, hanging over his legs while he propped himself up against his thighs. “I want to apologize to you. It’s not really good enough for me to just make an excuse and move on so. You know. I’m sorry for being a dick to John and being a dick to you.”

Rose didn’t respond right away. Every second she was quiet caused the knot in his stomach to twist over again and again. His chest was clenched and while he managed to keep the expression off his face, it _hurt_. Part of him didn’t want it to become a discussion. He was afraid of it becoming a discussion. Because if they had to discuss it, it meant he wasn’t in the clear, and he was still at risk of ruining everything forever. The other part of him begged for her to ask for more clarification, because that part of him knew that he didn’t deserve getting off scot free.

Finally she turned, smiling up at him and sliding one of her hands onto his knee. “Hearing that means a lot to me, Dave. Thank you.” She gave his leg a squeeze, thumb grazing across it. It was a gentle touch but it was comforting. Not quite enough to make him feel better, but he was starting to relax.

“I forgive you. I always will.”

There it was. He let out a breath before he even realized he was holding one in, slumping his way down to the couch cushion to sit next to her. Her smile seemed to widen, her hand never leaving his knee even as her fingers thrummed it gently and gave a bit of a rub to his thigh. He kept trying to smile, trying to think of something to say, but it wasn’t working. His internal organs were untwisting like the chains on a swingset and it was making his heart race in his chest. He didn’t deserve this. There was no way he deserved this.

“I know you weren’t acting that way on purpose. Even if the fumes weren’t present, it’s not an unthinkable reaction to be hostile to a stranger in your home. I should have run it by you before I brought him here.”

What? No. Rose, don’t turn this on yourself. She had every right to bring him here. After all, what she said before was true, as much as he denied it at first. He may have spent yesterday with her, but he also probably started her day the worst way possible then just left her alone. He wasn’t offering her any comfort. Of course she’d seek it somewhere else. He was being unreasonable. Why would she ever put an ounce of blame on herself? He wanted to argue but at the same time, he didn’t. He didn’t want to tell Rose she was wrong, or fight her, or try and correct how she was feeling.

“It’s no problem,” he tried. Something less hostile and bossy than what he would have gone for. She didn’t react in any negative way, so clearly that was a good thing to say. “I don’t mind guests. Especially if they’re your friends.”

She flashed him a smile but her eyes seemed foggy. More than a little sad.

“I should probably... Also say I’m sorry if you feel I. Took advantage of you. Last night, I mean."

Oh.

_Oh my God._

Dave felt his heart sink into his stomach. Was that how she felt? Was that how she had been feeling since he said that _totally fucking idiotic_ thing he said? Jesus, how could he let this happen? Why did he have to fucking say that?

“I thought you were just. Being an ass and calling me a slut but after John and I talked for awhile it sort of dawned on me that... I forced alcohol on you, then got on you, then kissed you...”

“Rose, you did not rape me.”

She stopped mid sentence and Dave was already tightly holding her hand.

“Don’t act like that isn’t what you’re thinking, we both know it is. But holy shit, I promise, that is not what happened. It’s not... Your fault we slept together it was a very intensely mutual thing. I was hardly even buzzed.”

She seemed to just... Slump. Right against him, breathing out, closing her eyes.

“I’m sorry,” she started, quietly laughing and holding his hand in return just as tightly. “I keep over thinking everything when I should just be talking to you. I know you hate it when I do that.”

That just made him feel guilty. Another uncomfortable knot in his stomach formed, but this time, he didn’t even know how to get rid of it.

“It’s okay,” he insisted, dropping his head on top of hers. “I’ve done more than my fair share of overthinking lately. Do not even worry about it, alright. I’m okay and we’re okay.”

Rose nodded as she lifted up her free hand to rub at her nose. Dave waited, patiently, for her to ask him to elaborate. He expected it, planned in his head that that would be the chance, that’s when he would spill about everything. About his ex, about his paranoia, about his feelings. But it never came. When he noticed her typing on her document with one hand he let go of her other, adjusting himself in his seat. His courage was all but cleared away.

“What are you working on?” He asked instead, tone melancholy. He was disappointed, but mostly ashamed of himself. Why did he need her to initiate things in order for his confidence to hold up. He still had explaining to do, but she didn’t even seem interested. Was she not even going to ask what he meant by what he said this morning? She just mentioned talking about it, didn’t she? So why the silence now?

But she just moved the hand he had been holding to her keyboard, back to typing. It didn’t seem to be her novel. Looked more like a letter.

“I finished my book while you were asleep,” she told him. “Obviously an editor will have to look at it, and I’ll do some edits myself over the next few days, but I’m sending the query tonight. I picked a new agent- someone that doesn’t mind emailed queries, so hopefully, it’ll take less time for the process to go through. If things are looking up, she’ll ask for a couple chapters in the next week or two.”

Well that was news. Nothing super out of the ordinary since this was Rose’s usual, but still exciting. Dave was mildly disappointed knowing she had been writing without him, but that wasn’t really a deserved feeling, so he tried not to dwell on it.

“You’ll have to tell me how it goes.”

Rose offered a nod, but she was pretty engrossed. He didn’t blame her. She had every right to be. The possibility of getting published was probably the most important thing to Rose. Far more important than him. Or anything he possibly had to say.

Dave stood and started toward the kitchen stretching his arms behind his head.

“Did you already eat?”

Rose didn’t respond for a moment, looking up while her fingers continued across her keyboard. “Sorry, what? Yes, I did. There’s leftovers in the fridge. Help yourself.”

Seemed to be the last of her attention he was going to get. But that was okay. It was all okay. He apologized, she was okay, he put her worries to rest. There probably wasn’t anyway she wasn’t still going to ask him what was going on, but she had more important matters to attend to, and he should leave her to them. His stuff could wait. Rose was an individual. She had her own life.

Mostly though, he was just mad at himself for being such a coward.

Sneaking glances at her between movements he reheated her fried rice, grabbing a Dr Pepper from the fridge and taking it and the bowl back to his room. It seemed to be cleared out after a day of the window being open, but the breeze was sort of relaxing, so he left it. He climbed up on his bed to eat, pulling his own laptop toward him and opening it.

He wasn’t really sure what he was aiming to do, though. All he managed to think about, even while browsing Reddit, even while checking Facebook, even while writing a shitpost on his blog about scrambled egg in rice, was Rose Lalonde, smiling and laughing, crying and hurting, and falling asleep next to him.

After sleeping all day it took hours for him to even get tired. He laid in bed, listening for any sort of movement in the living room. Any reminder that she was still there.

 

Thunder cracked with a flash of lightning, half rousing Dave from sleep. He groggily lifted his head enough to check the time- almost quarter after four in the morning. This city wasn’t exactly known for its bad weather, but whatever, you win some, you lose some. He dropped his head back down, back to sleep in seconds.

That was until another flash came, this time followed by a little squeak. When he opened his eyes he saw a figure- currently lifting up his blankets and crawling into his bed.

He should have been startled but he was just too fucking tired. He heard Rose whisper a quick apology as she pulled the blanket over herself. She curled up slightly, barely brushing him with her knees.

“Not good with thunder?” He said, low and groggy to the point he barely recognized his own voice. Was this a dream? He definitely couldn’t tell if he was awake. He reached for her to pull her closer to his chest, the warmth hitting him like a tidal wave. This was definitely real. Her warmth and her scent were definitely real.

“Maybe not,” was her answer- breathy and whispered. Dave just hummed and kept holding onto her. Stroking her hair, feeling her tense up when the thunder kept hitting.

She must have shut the window when she came in, because Dave could heard the rain hitting it as the storm started to calm down. His mind was still foggy and he didn’t think much of it. This whole thing seemed natural. Maybe it was because he was half conscious but nothing was off. Sleeping in the same bed as Rose, keeping her company, yup. That was how it should be. They were dating. Or they should be dating.

He fell back asleep when Rose stopped shuddering. When morning came around he was surprised to find her still in his bed, fast asleep under his arm and against his chest. Now that he was awake he was starting to see the strangeness to this set up, but he didn’t dwell on it. He just stayed with her. Reached over her carefully to grab his phone, dicking around while he waited for her to wake up.

His laughter was probably the thing that woke her, but, hey, it was almost 10 anyway. 

“I forgot I came in here,” she said, pulling an arm out from between them to rub her eyes. “Sorry, I probably shouldn’t have considering.”

Considering what?

“Don’t apologize,” he answered, rolling onto his back with a noisy stretch. “Don’t mind helping a friend in need. Besides I’m pretty sure sleeping in the same bed isn’t much more taboo than having sex so we might as well chop down the whole prude for boundaries thing.”

Although it was different. A lot different. And there were two absolutely opposite connotations. Someone like Rose probably thought way more of those connotations than Dave did. Maybe he should have been a bit more sensitive.

But she laughed, and he could feel her toes wiggle against his shins. They were freezing.

“Dave you acted like sleeping with me was a favor that I was supposed to be thanking you for. I mean, you literally told me not to worry about it, as if I pushed it on you. Then you came right back around and said you were completely willing. I don’t really know what to think. Definitely not what to assume.”

Was she only bringing this up because she was freshly woken up? Either way it made his stomach churn a little, both in anxiety and in guilt. Of course she was going to ask. Of course she was going to expect an answer. What he said was completely out of line. Even he knew it.

“I’m sorry.” He sighed. Hesitantly he moved his hand back to her hair, waiting for her to sit up or pull away if that’s what she felt like doing. He was comforted when she didn’t move aside from wiggling herself slightly closer to him. “I guess I was trying to pass it off that way because I... Was scared of the fact that I enjoyed it.”

Her expression just oozed with mocking offense and he gave a bit of a roll of his eyes.

“Not that you’re some gross bimbo that I’m ashamed of and wow, I should be worth better than this, how did I even sink this low? I just mean that I haven’t really opened up like that to anyone ever and the closest I ever got to it ended really, really fucking pathetically.”

Rose nodded, sliding a hand up along his chest and gripping at the fabric slightly. “Oh, yeah. You said you were cheated on, right?”

“Yeah.”

That was a long silence. He felt sick to his stomach. Couldn’t she say something so he didn’t have to make another first move?

“I’m not like. Suggesting that you sleeping around sometimes implies that you would be unfaithful I don’t think that. And I don’t really have a right to think that seeing as we’re not together in the first place.”

Rose seemed to take in a deep breath. Was she holding one? Or about to?

“I guess I was just mostly worried that if... It meant more to me than it did to you, then you would continue on with your life and I wouldn’t really be able to stop you and it’d... Feel the same as it did.”

Rose’s grip loosened and she instead started stroking across his chest, pressing her face closer to it.

“Oh, Dave. I promise, it meant a ton to me.”

His face flushed. His heart rate picked up. Now he wanted to kiss her more than ever, but he had no idea how to start it. Did he move her away? Wait for her to lift her head and surprise him? But damn. If she really liked being with him...

“Then...”

_Maybe we could do it again?_

His thought was interrupted by the xylophone intro of _Spooky Scary Skeletons_. Vibrations accompanied it, alerting Dave that oh great, his brother was calling, again. Facetime this time. Guess he couldn’t just wait or Dave to get on Skype again, could he.

He shouldn’t have answered. He really shouldn’t have answered. “Can I raincheck this, Bro, I’m kind of in the middle of something.”

He lifted his phone up so the camera pointed down on him, all of his focus put into keeping it angled in a way that Rose wasn’t showing. Last thing his brother ever needed to know about was this.

“Fuck no,” was the reply. “I sent you to LA how long ago? And you didn’t even thank me, for one, and you didn’t tell me anything that happened, or how it went, or even that you were gonna do it, like, is your girlfriend really that important that you can’t even fill me in?”

Fuck, haha, there was that flushing again. Pink right to his ears. He tried to laugh it off as he looked at Rose, rolling his eyes, making little “psh” sounds, even holding the phone out so she could see him.

“My idiot brother. Making shit up. As usual.”

Rose seemed to shy away when she looked up at the screen, staying pressed against his shirt to keep her face covered. Wait, fuck. That started a mess of dialogue- one that Dave wasn’t entirely sure how to get out of.

“Holy shit, is that her?” Bro chimed, grin wide.

“It’s already 10? Shoot.” Rose pushed up from Dave and spun around on the mattress, getting her feet to the floor.

“She’s not even ugly pretty, she’s just sexy. How’d you managed that?"

_“Bro!"_

“Sorry, Dave. I was supposed to meet with John this morning."

“Wait, what? Him again?”

“I will definitely give her away at your wedding if her dad isn’t around.”

_“Dude!”_

“I’m already late.” Rose got to her feet but was quick to turn back around. She flashed him a wink before she leaned up on the mattress, pressing her lips to the corner of his mouth with a cheery, “Thanks for last night.”

“What?”

She was off in an instant, and Dave was left alone with his brother whistling on the other side of the phone.

“Last night, eh? Having some fun? Good, you deserve it.”

“Come on, fuck off,” Dave snapped, throwing himself up in his bed the moment his door was shut. “I just let her sleep in here because of a thunderstorm. She isn’t even my girlfriend, for one, and for two, quit being such an ass. You can’t. Say shit like that. Show some respect.”

“Whoops, sorry,” Bro groaned, complete with an eye roll as he nudged a nail between his teeth. “Didn’t realize you were this legit.”

“What the fuck does that even mean?”

“It _means,_ you don’t get defensive like that over a girl you’re just sleeping with for fun. Obviously you got it pretty bad so I’ll lay off.”

Dave wanted to refute, and yell, and deny, but he just took it. It was better than trying to explain _anything_ to Bro. Dirk Strider was an enigma- one which not even 20 years of first hand experience could ever explain. Dave knew better than to argue semantics when he was already winning.

“Thank you.”

“But seriously. What happened in LA? You didn’t call or anything. Bad news?” God. He didn’t even know the half of it.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BTW: If you don't have an AO3 you can track the #Roommate Wanted Fic tag on tumblr to get updates! I would also love if you used this tag if you post anything about the fic so I can read it!

Rose was out of breath by the time she was through the coffee shop door. She located John quickly and rushed herself over, climbing up on the bar-height chair and dropping her bag to the floor. Her hands moved right to remove her scarf, cheeks red and rosey from the rush.

“Sorry!” Was the first thing she said, tugging at the collar of her shirt to air her chest out. “I had sort of a late night with Dave last night and we slept in.”

“We, plural?” He asked, shooting over a smirk from behind his coffee cup with a sarcastic wag of his eyebrows. Rose just rolled her eyes, but her resolve failed her when she found herself smiling and glancing away from him with the slightest of flushes on her face. Honestly, she wasn’t sure why she had been so shy about things up until now. They slept together once, why was she so scared of initiating something again?

“It’s not what you think,” she answered, tone slightly scolding. Not that John took it as a scolding. If anything he was grinning eagerly at her. It was embarrassing and Rose was laughing and hiding behind her hands and John just _grinned_. What a valuable friend. What a good guy. “I don’t want to tell you what it was because I’m embarrassed.”

“Well, you don’t have to tell me,” he offered with a shrug, tracing the rim of his coffee cup idly. “I mean I totally understand having personal reasons for stuff and I don’t want to make you uncomfortable or anything.”

That was actually a little surprising. She slumped back when she exhaled, finally starting to cool down. God, she hated summer. “Really?”

“Course, course,” he answered, flippant and nonchalant while Rose got up from her seat to dig through her bag. She seriously needed an iced tea to cool down. Hell, she might even go for a smoothie. As she walked away John chimed up again, apparently having no shame over calling across half the café.

“Just means I’m gonna totally assume you bedded him.”

Rose stumbled in her walk, still laughing. This was so stupid. She felt stupid but she was so... Happy. She was happy Dave apologized, she was happy she knew the story behind his weird cop out, and she was happy to realize that there might still be a semblance of a chance that something real could happen between them. Something really real. She loved the thought of it. It terrified her, but she loved it.

She returned to the table with her triple berry smoothie, climbing back into her seat. Once she set the cup down she was digging through her bag for her laptop. Her eyes hadn’t left her email tab since she set off her query letter. She knew it would be a few days for a response, but hey, she was still excited.

“You’ll never guess what happened last night,” she sang eventually, her finger wiggling across the trackpad of her laptop to wake it up. It had been at least 20 minutes since she last checked her email, she was overdue. “And this morning.”

“Uh, didn’t I already?” John answered, sarcasm evident in his tone. Now Rose was laughing all over again. This time he sat back a little in his seat, eyes just a bit wide. “Well, jokes aside, it was clearly something good. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in this good of a mood.”

“I know, it’s insane,” she whined, taking in a breath to compose herself. She was in a good mood. Between Dave and her book... She was having a very, very good day. Usually her life was lived one day at a time and her happiness depended on if she got laid or not. But now... This was a real romantic interest, with real romantic potential. No games, or waking up in the morning to it all being gone. Of course she was intimidated, especially after her last relationship tanked, but she was hopeful.

“Well don’t leave me hanging, Rose.” John leaned forward a bit in his seat, still grinning, folding his arms across the table and propping himself up with them. Rose stalled her answer when she looked at him. Why did he even wait this long for her? Why did she deserve any of the good things going on in her life right now?

“Well, firstly, Dave apologized for being rude to us and says you’re welcome over any time,” she started, practically bragging with the way she wiggled her shoulders into place. She flipped her hair out of her face and moved a hand to the back of her neck.

It was odd, though. John seemed to hesitate. He nodded a bit, sure, and he was still smiling. But he didn’t look all that... Pleased. Maybe his feelings were more hurt than she realized? She was quiet for a moment before she continued, going back to her laptop to arrange things.

“Secondly, he apologized for and explained why he acted the way he did the morning after. He was just worried that it didn’t mean anything to me and that was all it would ever be between us. You were completely right and I was freaking out thinking he was just an asshole.” She breathed a sigh of relief. John looked all but unimpressed. Even his smile had faded and he was avoiding eye contact.

“That’s great, Rose,” he answered flatly, seemingly toying with his nails under the table. He definitely... Was not happy for her. What gives?

“Is everything okay?” she asked finally, tilting her laptop screen down so she could look at him. He glanced up for only a moment before looking right back down, his lips moving just a bit as he seemed to be choosing his words carefully.

“It’s just that... I mean, don’t you think it’s a little... Unfair that he found an insecurity and his response was to take it out on you and make you feel bad?”

What?

Rose’s initial response was to feel offended. Insulted, honestly. She felt it sink into her stomach and her gaze narrowed. What exactly what he suggesting and why?

“Well, I guess? But I mean, he explained. And he’s always been overly proud. It’s not all that surprising.”

“There’s a difference between it being surprising and it being excusable, Rose,” John mumbled, lifting a hand to scratch at his upper arm. “I just. I don’t know. I’ve always been really good at understanding people and something about Dave just. Rubs me the wrong way. I mean, was he really fine with me being around, or was he just saying that?”

Rose had to think back. He said it was fine that she had guests yesterday, but this morning...

_Wait, what? Him again?_

Now she was starting to feel like offended wasn’t quite the right response.

“What are you trying to say, exactly?”

John sighed a bit, avoiding her gaze while he mulled it over. Rose didn’t actually want to hear it. She knew what he was getting at. She could already hear it in her head.

“I’m not trying to say anything definitive. I barely know the guy, I know you’re a big girl who can handle herself, all that stuff. I’m just. You know pointing out that there are some... Red flags and I hope you’ll keep them in mind next time he gets set off.” He paused but Rose didn’t even notice. Her mind was racing and it certainly didn’t stop when John did. “You’re a really great person and you don’t have to feel like this thing with Dave is all or nothing. Stand up for yourself and everything, you know?”

Alright, deep breath. Yes there were things but they weren’t necessarily an end game. Rose could do this. She would heed John’s warning, pay better attention, don’t let the daydream stamp out the reality. She was an adult. With a small nod of her head she flashed him a smile, fingernails drumming over the table in a steady, nervous rhythm.

“You’re absolutely right,” she agreed, struggling to relax even as she downed way too many gulps of her smoothie and ended up with brain freeze. She slid a hand to her forehead where it throbbed, breathing out a laugh at how absurdly childish it was. “I’ll be careful, I promise. No turning a blind eye.”

That seemed to ease John’s worries a bit. His shoulders slumped as they relaxed and he smiled a bit more genuinely than he had been before. “Then I’ll stop worrying.”

While that was the end of the conversation, Rose couldn’t find herself able to stop worrying as easy as John could.

Rose didn’t want this to become a big deal. She didn’t want to worry about it, or think about it, or let it hold her back from how she felt. But that was how you got roped in. She was lucky to have gotten the sense knocked into her before she was leashed up. She should be taking advantage of it, not wasting it. It wouldn’t be that big of a deal, right? Just hold off really asking him out until she had more time to think about it and observe his behavior. Just a few weeks that could save her years of potential abuse. That’s all.

She’d likely have to talk to him about it, too, eventually. She probably dreaded that more than anything else. Not only because of the possibility of him lashing out at the accusation, but also the possibility that hearing it would make him push her away out of guilt and fear of himself.

Her and John had shifted their chairs so they were on one side of the table, a tab opened up on Rose’s laptop and the two of them sharing a pair of earbuds to watch crummy YouTube let’s plays. It came as a shock when Rose finally glanced at the time, realizing that, holy shit, she had literally been here for two hours.

Her eyes darted to the label of the other tab in her browser, and she instantly shouted a quick, “Hold on!” before hitting the spacebar to pause the video. John pulled out his ear bud after Rose did, sitting back in his seat.

“What is it?” He asked, lifting up his coffee cup and taking a sip, only for his face to turn sour when he realized how cold the drink had gotten. He was quick to put it back, shaking his head in disgust.

“New email,” she answered, hitting the new tab with her heart racing. “From my query agent.” Oh God, this was it. She could barely stand this. Queries usually took days the way she did them. Maybe this one hadn’t been emailed in a while? Or maybe Rose’s query letter was just that good. Her heart practically sunk when John took the laptop away, hoisting it above his head.

“I’ll read it to you,” he announced, and Rose gave in to him while she practically bounced in her seat. John cleared his throat before lowering his voice, mocking professionalism. “Dear Miss Lalonde.”

“I only pick female agents,” Rose pointed out, stifling her laughter. John added a quick “Oh, ok” before he adjusted his voice accordingly. Of course his feminine voice was stupidly believable, all things considered. Had it actually been lowered from treatments or was he just that good at voices? It was sort of embarrassing – No, not embarrassing, just a little... Flattering? To hear John’s natural voice, especially when it was currently reading something that meant the world and a half to her.

 

_Dear Miss Lalonde,_

_I must say I’m impressed with the summary you have sent me about your book. The plot seems original and riveting, and the characters you’ve presented me have a lot of potential for becoming iconic, given the genre and platform you have chosen. I can tell you for certain your decision to include a character who is vocally and narratively agender may have single handedly guaranteed my interest and I trust with your own LGBT background that you have the capability to execute them well, which I hope to see._

_Please send me the first three chapters of your manuscript in PDF format, preferably in size 12 Times. I’ll take a read through them in the next few days and get back to you with how I plan to move forward, as well as with any legal arrangements that may be necessary._

_Cheers._

 

 

“Holy shit,” she shouted, probably a little too loud judging by the dirty glances she managed to gain from other patrons. She quickly clapped a hand over her mouth, face heating up to the tips of her ears. She revealed her mouth a little bit later, grinning at John while he stared at the screen, an impressed pout across his lips as he nodded his head.

She scrambled to pull the computer toward her, needing to read everything for herself. There it was. And so soon. Right here. It had finally happened. She took a deep breath, laughing in exhale as John smacked her shoulder lovingly.

“Congratulations, Rose!”

God. Rose shook her head as she tried to compose herself, getting down from her seat so she could start putting her computer away.

“Sorry, John, I need to tell Dave. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

John gave a pleased thumbs up, already turned around in his seat to pick up his own bag. “You bet, Rose. Go celebrate. Bonus points if you drunk text me!”

Getting drunk to celebrate? Oh, what a good idea. “Definitely,” she assured him, practically running out the door. She hadn’t even bothered to buckle up her bag, and she didn’t stop to do it until she was safely seated on the bus. She just managed to contain her urge to dance in the elevator, and when she walked through the door she was already loudly announcing herself.

“Dave! I have amazing news!”

She laughed a bit when she realized he was just in the kitchen, making her yelling a bit over the top. Still she practically glided in on cloud 9, reaching for his hands and spinning them both around. Dave breathed out a laugh, knocking his head back over his shoulder.

“Just a second,” he announced, apparently not to her. When she peaked over her shoulder she could see the man from the morning was apparently still on call, his face now donning Dave’s laptop instead of his phone. “What’s the news?” Now he was addressing her. She got refocused, looking up at him with a grin.

"Remember how I told you I sent my query letter off last night?” She started, pads of her fingers tickling at his palms. Dave just nodded as he listened, thought his eyebrows were just slightly raised above his glasses which Rose knew meant he was surprised, attentive, and interested. “I already got a response, which is. Unbelievable, really, but I think I really got their attention with all the LGBT stuff.”

“Well what did they say?” Dave asked, eagerly ducking his head just a bit closer to her.

“Yeah, what did they say?” His brother chimed, receiving a quick shush from Dave over his shoulder. Rose just laughed, biting onto her lip. Holy shit, it was such a good day.

“She asked for chapters. Which means I am that much closer to finally getting published.”

“Rose that’s awesome!” Dave responded, not even skipping a beat. Rose couldn’t help herself. She hopped up on him and he easily caught her, swinging her around the kitchen while her arms were pulled tight around his neck. “You’re like, two-thirds of the way there already. You gonna celebrate or what?”

“Yes,” she announced, flush in the face when she found herself back on her feet. “I am going to get unbelievably drunk. Do you want to join me?” Of course it was too early to get drunk now, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t have something light, and she pulled out her bottle of Clamato in perpetration.

"I want to, but I gotta work tomorrow morning. I’ll be official babysitter.”

“The most valuable team player.”

Rose set herself up next to Dave’s laptop, and with every glance at the screen she could just tell his brother was watching her. Might as well not act like an elephant in the room.

“You must be the infamous older Strider,” she said, raising her voice just slightly to catch the computer’s mic. “I’ve seen your work online. Very original.”

Bro’s laugh was warm, but not in the usual warm laugh way. It was deep and chesty and a little intimidating. Especially with how his gaze burned so hot she could feel it through a computer screen. “No way Dave told you about those,” he said decidedly, adjusting the blue cap that was seated on his head. “Coincidence or lucky find in roomie research?”

“The latter,” she answered, slicing up a lime and rimming the glass in it. She stole all sorts of ingredients from work. Now that she thought about it, this was probably the most garnished and fancy cocktail Dave had seen her make. She dipped the glass in the usual celery salt. Neither Strider seemed to mention anything about her drinking in the afternoon until she was pulling out the bottle of RedHot and her stock of Worcestershire sauce.

“What the hell?” Dave started, eyeing her ingredients as she poured a shot of vodka over the ice in her glass. Okay, make it a double. She was having a good day. She filled the glass with Clamato and topped it off with a few drops of each sauce right on top. She used a stick of celery to stir it, leaving it in. “Did you just put hot sauce in your booze?”

“Yes,” she answered, tipping the glass into her mouth. She made sure she was out of Bro’s view when she licked a little at the rim of the glass, intentionally and teasingly cocking an eyebrow in Dave’s direction. He seemed momentarily flustered which was good enough for her. “Never heard of a Caesar?”

“Isn’t that shit a Canadian drink?” Bro asked, tilting closer to peer at it. Rose offered the glass to the camera and he gave a nod. “Didn’t expect you to be so well dranked, Rose.”

Rose ignored the painful grammar in favor of taking another sip.

“I’m a bartender,” she told him. “I know plenty of cocktails from around the world. My mother always told me Caesars were the lunch time drink. Thusly, I am drinking it at lunch.”

“Thusly,” Bro echoed mockingly. Rose sneered at him and he grinned. She was way too happy to be offended by that.

“But why would you put hot sauce in it,” Dave whined, flipping his grilled cheese and making silent upset gestures at it when he revealed it was burnt.

“Oh, just try it,” Rose demanded, holding it out to him. Dave leaned over without any hands, leaving Rose to tip the drink to his lips. She could feel Bro’s gaze on her closer than ever. She could even see the way he was tilting his head up as he watched like a sports fan when someone’s about to score a goal.

Though to be honest the way Dave’s eyes held her gaze while she practically fed him was... A little alluring. And with them being watched it was a bit sexy, too. Yikes. She shook herself back to attention when she realized he had already had two sips of it, moving it back to the counter. She darted out of the view of the camera, and for good reason, as Dave’s brother began to whistle appreciatively.

“Not bad I guess but...” Dave made something akin to a gagging noise, his face scrunched up in disgust. “Too much booze, dude.”

“Pansy,” Rose teased, taking a sip herself. Okay it was a little too boozy, but whatever. Good day. She was having a good day!

“Yeah, pansy,” Bro added, prompting Dave to knock his head back in frustration.

Rose moved away from the counter as she took another drink, humming as she did to get attention. “If you make me a grilled cheese, I’ll eat the burnt one,” she offered, finding her way into the living room to set her glass down. She really needed to change into a pair of shorts. It was absurdly hot out.

Dave looked at her in disdain. She could feel it even as she retreated into her room. Rose just laughed because he couldn’t refuse. Even though he’d have to make another sandwich, it also meant he didn’t have to eat or waste the one he managed to ruin. Rose won either way. And she didn’t really dislike burnt flavors.

When she came back into the kitchen Dave had started a second sandwich, Rose’s set aside on the counter already cut and plated. She sung a mocking “Thank you,” before taking it away into the living room, getting comfy on the couch. She let her thoughts wander while she ate, letting the conversation between Dave and his brother turn into white noise.

Dave didn’t act jealous or bitter when she told him her success. He didn’t hesitate, or need to work up being happy for her. He just was. A good sign and really, really hopeful news for the future.

He joined her in the living room not too long later, computer shut and left on the kitchen counter. It was strange she didn’t even hear his brother say goodbye. He was silent at first, dipping his sandwich in a pool of ketchup before taking a bite out of it.

“So if you’re actually getting published does that mean I can read the book?” He asked, smirking at her. He was teasing her, obviously, but she was surprisingly okay with that.

“You can have the first copy, signed and all. I’ll even design you your own cover. It’ll be called _Compelaneeseeyee of the Yearned (For Dick)_ and the entire book will be printed in comic sans.”

Dave paused his chewing to laugh, knocking his head back. “God bless the United States of America.”

Rose found herself leaning on him as she was reduced to laughing too, appreciating the jab of his shoulder into her cheek that she probably shouldn’t find comfortable, relaxing into scent of over-worn clothes she shouldn’t find pleasant, and melting into the 100 degrees the room plus his body heat made for her that she should not find perfect.

It was going to be a good night.


	23. Chapter 23

Dave Strider had never been a man of science. The most science he did was mixing developer and fix solutions. But the whole question hypothesis materials procedure observations data conclusions shit? Hell no. But he did know the concept of factors and trials. And right now, with all the observations and data he had, he couldn’t quite put his finger on which factor was making such a startling difference between Rose-drunk-the-other-day and Rose-drunk-now.

Maybe it was because he was sober this time, and last time he just didn’t really notice it? Maybe it was because Rose probably drank three times as much tonight as she did the other day. But something was way different. Before Rose was mildly silly and a bit childish. Today? She was loud and excitable and... Emotional? But only positive emotions. He’d already managed to make her cry once when he complimented her meal. Her words: “I’m just so happy because I feel so appreciated and you mean so much to me.”

After that she had just sort of clung onto him for probably 10 minutes before getting distracted and dashing across the apartment.

As of now it was only 8PM, but Rose was effectively, completely shitfaced, and still drinking. Every time Dave looked over at her he wondered if she was blacked out yet. Did Rose black out? He didn’t know. 20 minutes ago she drunk dialed John and the three of them were talking while Dave half-paid attention to a hockey game.

“John I need you to un’erstand that you’re... So inspiring. I mean. All the shit you’ve been through? Like? What the fuck?” Rose had laid herself out on the couch with her feet wiggling around in Dave’s lap, and her phone propped up near her face with the speaker on. Her head was swaying back and forth and every few moments she’d dive into one of her childish fits where she’d swing the phone around a few times in wide circles making “woo” noises.

“Thanks, Rose,” John answered, clearly stifling his laughter. “You inspire me, too! I mean wow, a published author? Can’t beat that!”

“Holy _fuck_ ,” Rose exclaimed, swinging herself up in her seat. She reached over and swatted Dave’s shoulder a few times to get his attention. Dave of course looked over with no amount of hesitance, finding it really damn hard to swallow down the size of his grin at this whole spectacle. He honestly didn’t even mind that she got John involved. “Dave did you-? Did you know that I might get published?”

“Yeah,” he answered, his tone just as condescending as it would be were he talking to a toddler. “You told me earlier, remember?”

“Oh, right,” she agreed, laying back down and smacking her lips. “You’re right. I remember. An’ your brother was there. What did you and your brother talk about?”

Leaning back in his seat Dave smacked his thigh with the television remote a few times, mulling it over. “We talked about what happened in LA, what’s been going on at work, what classes I’m gonna take. He told me about some guy he started seeing who sounds just as dweeby and stupid as all his exes.”

“Your brother is gay!” Rose shouted, apparently just only now remembering the fact. Dave was sure they’d discussed it before. Positive. “Man, that’s why you’re so good about all my queer stuff—Ope. Sorry, John, are you okay with that word, I know some people aren’t.”

John’s laugh was a little hesitant over the call, but Dave could practically hear the shrug in his tone. “I don’t really use it myself, but I don’t mind if you do.” Weird, Dave didn’t really get any homosexual vibes from that guy. Maybe he was bi like Rose?

“Okay,” she agreed, eyes long since fluttered closed while she smiled to herself. “I’ll only use it when you aren’t listening.”

Another awkward laugh. Rose sure was wordy.

“Thanks, Rose. I’m gonna hang up though, alright? I still got some stuff to get to tonight.”

Rose’s devastated inhale was so exaggerated as she sat back up, practically whining out her high pitched, “Okay, bye!”

“Byeeee,” he sang back. “Nice talking to you, Dave.”

“Likewise, Bro. See you later.” So maybe a little bit of a formality. But not all the way. That was progress enough for Dave.

“John’s so great,” Rose mused, carelessly letting her phone hit the floor. She turned herself around on the couch, arms stretching across Dave’s lap like a cat before she promptly let her head hit his thigh. “You know who else is great? You are. I wish you guys got along better. We’d be great friends. All of us. Oh! Maybe John and Jade could pair off! Except he’s so ace he could be a dude’s trump card.”

Dave wasn’t really sure how that analogy worked. He also wasn’t really sure what ace meant. Whatever, he could Google it later. Still, the rest of her daydream sounded nice. Dave could probably get along with John if he was sure nothing was going on between him and Rose; if him and Jade really did pair off. But as of now... He had a bit of an inkling they probably had something going on. Maybe nothing romantic but.

“Are you implying that you and me are going to pair off?” He teased, mostly trying to scramble up her wording over anything else. But the way Rose grinned and propped her head up in her hands and looked up at him like a teenage girl in the middle of some hot gossip...

“Nooooo,” was her answer, the trademark tone of a guilty child almost too evident for her own good. Course he had to be stupid enough to let it make his heart swell. Do not hold Rose accountable for what she says when she’s under the influence. Have some damn integrity. “I dunno, do you wanna pair off?”

Yes, a million times yes.

“Maybe when you haven’t had so many drinks,” he cooed, flicking her on the nose. She groaned before rolling herself onto the floor, seriously starting to look less than fully conscious.

“I didn’t even realize I had that many until it was too late,” she whined. “I didn’t mean to get this drunk, Dave. It was an accident. But I’m so drunk. The world is spinning. I want to go out for ice cream. Can we?”

“That sounds like a less than stellar idea,” he answered flatly, training his eyes on her as she slumped on the floor. Maybe it was over-the-top, creepy, overprotective daddy of him but he did want to make sure he could roll her on her side in time if she looked like she might hurl. “I don’t even know if you’re still coherent. I’d rather we just lay low until you’re sober.”

“I can’t get much lower than the _floor_ , Dave,” she snapped, the sass of it smacking him in the face. Damn. “But okay.” She sat herself up and reached over the coffee table, tugging her bottle of vodka toward her and unscrewing the cap. “I will just take a shot.”

“Rose, you’ve already taken what, seven? On top of your cocktails?” He really should be more assertive than this. But he also felt hells of uncomfortable trying to control her or tell her what to do. “Maybe it’s time to put the bottles away.”

“Shush.” A quick and simple response. Her pour was clumsy and a few drops of Absolut hit the table top, but she didn’t seem to mind. Down the shot went, her face turning sour as she groaned and let her head hit the couch behind her. “This stuff is too sweet. I thought it was better tasting than this; I’m really disappointed.”

“That’s the way the cookie crumbles,” Dave answered, leaning forward in his seat to clean up after Rose’s mess. Screwed the lid back on the vodka, ripped off a piece of paper towel to wipe up the spill. He’d been doing it all night. Surprisingly enough he didn’t think much of it. He was used to cleaning up after Rose anyway.

Slowly, Rose started to climb backwards back up onto the couch. There was something devious in the way she moved her legs up one after the other, and Dave was definitely watching. They were long and silky and the way she spread them out next to her, just barely bent and offset got his head stirring. Of course it didn’t help that she was wearing tiny-ass shorts. Still, he knew not to touch, and he knew not to watch. Look, yes. Not watch.

“Dave, I was wonderin’, like... Since we did the whole thing and all...”

On the outside, he stoically nodded his head to show he was attentively listening. On the inside he wanted to fucking scream. Of course she was finally talking about this, when it ate at him in guilt because she’s _drunk_ she doesn’t know any better, none of this _counts_ and you’re an asshole for thinking it does.

Worse yet Rose was scooting herself closer. Her hand curled around his thigh and gave it a squeeze, and her drunken bedroom eyes had been firmly focused on his body for at least three minutes. Why couldn’t she have been doing this this morning? When he could actually eagerly say yes and it’d be great and fun. Now all he could do is peel her hand off of him.

“Not now,” was his answer. Flat, to the point. Absolutely not now. “Ask me again tomorrow.”

Rose whined a little bit, obviously not satisfied. He shivered as her breath ghosted over his neck and ears and yep, there it was, she pressed her lips to his neck, bubbling up in giggles before she could even manage a full minute of being alluring.

“But I’m not going to be confident enough to ask you tomorrow,” she argued, moving her hands back to him which, he promptly re-removed.

“This isn’t confidence, Rose, it’s just... Impaired judgment. Big difference. If you don’t... Want to do this when you’re sober then you probably just... Don’t want to do it.” Ouch. He knew it was true, an important lesson to drill into her head right about now, but... It still hurt to consider. She had been drinking last time something happened. Not anywhere near this degree, but... “I. Have all the interest in the world in sleeping with you. But it’s gonna be a no-go for tonight.”

Finally she seemed satisfied, head slumping against his shoulder while she sulked and pouted. It was a long pause before she spoke again. Her voice seemed tight, and it worried him a little.

“Were you jealous when you found out about my book?” She asked quietly, her hand sliding to weasel its way under his. Dave willingly held it.

“Course not. I mean... I guess a little? But only because I want to feel what you feel, not because I think you deserve it less than me. Trust me, me being happy for you was way more what I had going on. Either than that, you just gave me some hope that I can succeed too.”

Rose was mostly unresponsive, staring forward in silence for a few moments. She didn’t even acknowledge his response.

“Do you wish I wouldn’t hang out with John?”

“What? Why are you asking me this? I don’t care if you hang out with John. I can’t expect you to talk to no one but me."

She seemed satisfied. He wasn’t sure why he was being interviewed, or where any of this concern was coming from. But it was over now. She was starting to fall asleep on him, swallowing down yawn after yawn between drunken groans of misery.

Dave turned the TV off. Rose seemed to almost be startled awake, a long inhale being pulled in and her head lifting off his shoulder just slightly. She moved a hand to rub her eye, her entire body swaying just slightly back and forth.

“You should turn in,” he suggested, practically muttering as he watched her. Even as an absolute mess of ratty hair and sweaty skin and smeared make up she was too fucking gorgeous for him to handle. What a joke. He got to his feet, quick to offer her a hand. “I’ll help you out, bring you a glass of water.”

It was a while before she spoke, seemingly composing herself but not taking his hand. She looked up almost bashfully, still incapable of opening her eyes all the way.

“I want to sleep in your bed with you,” she admitted, finally reaching for him and pulling herself up. “I... Like it better than being alone.”

Fuck. Fuck him, fuck Rose Lalonde. He fucking loved her. He was head over his damn heels in love with her.

“Alright,” he agreed, getting his arm around her waist to help her stumble along. “You want to change or sleep in that?”

“This is fine,” she answered, clinging onto him while he dragged her down the hall.

Of course he put her into bed first. She was hardly conscious when she hit the mattress, and she didn’t protest when he left the room to grab the mop bucket and a couple glasses of water. Better safe than sorry if she finished one and needed another in the middle of the night.

When he got back though she was definitely awake, poofing Dave’s pillows, pushing over his blanket so she could spoon with it. He laughed a bit to himself as he set down all the things he’d grabbed, making sure to open the window and turn on the fan. Gonna be one hot night if he was going to have her extra body heat.

“Comfy?” He asked, debating whether or not it was appropriate to take his shirt off before ultimately- no, but it was too hot to leave it on, so he’d have to just deal. He tugged it off by the back of the collar, throwing it in the hamper. He hopped himself right over Rose to get to the side of the bed next to the wall, leaving her full access to the bucket currently stationed on the floor. “Have some water before you sleep, alright. I’ll leave you some bacon in the morning.”

Rose let out a pleased moan as she started to drink, downing half the glass in one go. She seemed exhausted. It was stupidly early to try and sleep and Dave knew they’d probably be up for a while chatting, but at the very least she was away from the booze now. When she was finished with her water she rolled herself over to throw an arm around him, nestling her head against his chest.

“You’re a great person,” she mused, quiet and practically to herself. Her eyes weren’t even half lidded at this point. Just closed. “I’m really glad I met you.”

Dave let himself smile since he was effectively out of view. He moved a hand over hers and stroked it with his thumb, breathing out a sigh. “Ditto. I... Can’t imagine how I lived without you, honestly.”

“I want to have sex when I’m sober.”

Oh. That was blunt. Dave laughed a bit, giving her hand a pat.

“Alright, we can do that.”

“I mean it,” she added, and he could feel the gentle bite of her nails in his chest. “And I’m going to fuck you this time.”

He probably should have expected that. It was a little awkward to think about, being... A receiver. All of high school had taught him that shit was gay as hell. Maybe it was a little gay? But he was attracted to Rose, Rose was a woman, so obviously it was still significantly straight, too. If there was one thing he had observed from Rose’s company it was that she saw no reason to treat men and women any different.

She obviously penetrated her female partners, so he was definitely, not different. He shouldn’t even see himself as different, either. Rose had the right way of going about things. They were equals. They should be having equal sex, too.

“Okay,” he finally breathed, closing his eyes promptly because man, he did not want to see the look on Rose’s face if there ended up being one. This was a big step, and he was now pleading she wasn’t blacked out so he wouldn’t have to worry about having this conversation again.

“Okay?"

“Yeah.”

“Okay.” 


	24. Chapter 24

Despite the burning hangover, Rose felt sort of... Serene when she finally woke up. Warm under Dave’s blankets, sounds of the city below coming in through his window and the gentle breeze of his fan. She took in a deep breath as she opened her eyes, her nose catching scent of the familiar smell of bacon. And so it was, a plate set up on his desk for her. And it was just not quite crispy, the exact way she liked it.

Dave had passed her test. Gave all the right answers to her questions, didn’t take advantage of her even when she threw herself at him. Obviously she wasn’t going to let this knock down her entire guard, but she was already feeling a million times more confident about moving forward with him.

She let her eyes fall closed after as she reached over for a bacon strip, her hand blindly feeling around his desk until she felt the greasy crisp under her fingers. After slipping it in her mouth she finally looked over. It was already 10. Dave was going to be home in an hour anyway. And this bacon was probably at least four hours old, if not five or six. She was almost surprised at how he had managed to get out of the house without waking her, but. Dave always was a bit on the stealthy side.

With a pleased smile Rose stretched her legs, toes curling under the blankets. This was nice. This was such a perfect morning, and this was just how she wanted to spend every morning after this one. It was probably time to come clean. She should come clean. She’d get dressed, have a nice shower, and when he got home... Well, it was time already!

Taking a couple more strips of bacon to go Rose made her way to the bathroom, stripping off her shirt and shorts as she went and leaving them in the hallway. She hummed to herself when she rounded through the bathroom door, spinning on the balls of her feet as she shut the door behind her.

“ _Everything that kills me makes me feel alive._ ”

Off came her undergarments as she pulled the ponytail out from her hair, flicking it carelessly into the sink and pulling a towel off the bar to throw at the floor outside the shower door. It was sort of nice knowing Dave wasn’t home. Cliched as it was... Who doesn’t love to sing in the shower? And Rose never was much of a singer.

“ _Lately I’ve been, I’ve been losing sleep, dreaming about the things that we could be._ ”

She let herself get into it while she scrubbed at her scalp, skin flushed with hot water and eyes closed while it poured over her face. It was relaxing, even with a bit of a headache. Wiping away sweat, wiping away sleep. Amazing how good a simple shower could make you feel.

“ _Take that money, watch it burn! Sink in the river the lessons I’ve learned. Take that money watch it b—_ “

Shooting her head up Rose paused, ears catching the faint sound of banging over the sound of the water stream. Sounded like it was coming from outside. Did Dave lock himself out? Sounded a bit violent for Dave, though. What the hell?

Giving her hair a lazy rinse from conditioner Rose turned off the tap, picking up her towel and quickly wrapping it around herself. She took off for the door, hugging cotton against her breasts with a simple arm crossed over them. The banging was insistent, definitely coming from the front door.

“Give me a damn minute,” she snapped, slipping a bit on her own shorts before managing to make it to the door. She flipped the lock and pulled it open, ready to roll her eyes at Dave. Talk about disappointing.

“Finally you answer. I was beginning to think you were ignorin’ me, Rosey. I could hear you singing so I knew you were home!”

The voice grated against Rose’s ears like a sorority sister. But unfortunately despite even the embarrassed flush currently across her cheeks from getting caught singing, this was much, much worse.

“Mom, what are you _doing_ here?"

The tone wasn’t welcoming. And Mom’s face didn’t waver or fall- she knew what to expect coming here. Rose wasn’t going to accommodate her.

“A mother can’t visit?” She sung, coming inside without invitation. Thankfully she wasn’t dragging in anything more than a purse so she wasn’t planning on staying more than a day.

“I’m surprised you could stay sober long enough to make the flight,” Rose groaned, accepting with disdain the hug she was promptly pulled into. Out of all the interruptions she could have had today, this had to be it? Pressed against her mother soaking wet wasn’t the best of feelings and her nose scrunched up in disgust.

“Your boobs are bigger,” Mom noted when she let go, patting in vain at the wet spots now dotting her jacket. “You aren’t pregnant, are you?”

“For God’s sake, Mom,” Rose grunted, face flushing all over again as she tugged her towel up further on her chest. “Of course I’m not pregnant. I’ve been on the patch since I was 15.”

“You can’t expect me to know where you are in your life,” Mom argued, dumping her purse on the kitchen table as she started to discard her coat. “You don’t call; you didn’t even come home last Christmas.”

So that got a minor rise out of Rose. She felt her chest heat up in anger, but there was a small blossom of guilt mixed in that made her swallow and glance away.

“I don’t feel welcome at home,” she snapped, padding down the hall to snatch up her clothing before storming back in the direction of her room. “You damn well know that.”

Mom chose not to respond to that, letting Rose make a quick exit to her room. Infuriating. Nosy. Total mood killer. Guess today wouldn’t be the day she finally said anything to Dave. Thanks, Mom. Thank you for thinking you would ever be welcome here.

When Rose returned from her room she scrubbed her towel at her wet hair, now at least _dressed_ for this stupid meet and greet. Mom had started to help herself to the contents of the fridge- of course- but Rose was quick to move over and snatch up the vodka bottle she’d gotten out.

“Don’t even think about it,” Rose snarled, moving to put it back above the fridge where it belonged. “You are not going to come to my home and drink so you can’t leave. I’m not having it. It’s disrespectful enough to come here unannounced.”

Her resolve held even as Mom groaned and whined, popping an olive in her mouth before closing the jar back up. “Is there a reason you’re perpetually angry at me, Rosey?” She asked so genuinely, and God, it didn’t succeed in anything but making Rose even angrier.

“Who knows,” she scoffed, throwing her towel over the back of a chair before sitting in another. Even if she couldn’t fill up the entire table to discourage her mother from joining her, the least she could do was set off a firm message of ‘not fucking welcome.’ “After I get my degree maybe I’ll be able to shrink myself and we’ll find out.”

“I offered you therapy all your life, Rose,” Mom argued, sighing into her fist. Despite Rose’s completely closed off body language her mother was ready and willing to waltz right over, pulling out the chair directly next to Rose and taking a seat in it.

“Yeah, I know. More money to throw around instead of just talking to me. I get it. But I didn’t need a therapist. I already knew what was wrong.”

“So why can’t you tell me?”

Because you wouldn’t understand? Because you wouldn’t care? Because you wouldn’t change anyway? Because it wouldn’t stop your drinking, it wouldn’t stop your partying, it wouldn’t make Dad magically reveal himself as to who or where he was, or why he wasn’t with them. It wouldn’t matter. Rose stayed silent.

“Your place is a lot cleaner than last time I came by,” Mom said eventually, breaking a long silence. “I can’t imagine you cleaning much.”

At least she didn’t push for an answer. Rose nodded in agreement, taking a look around. Dave really did keep up with them both. It was impressive. “Jade had a family emergency so I got a new roommate for the summer,” she answered, her voice a lot quieter compared to before. It was a lot easier to be her mom’s friend as opposed to daughter. It always had been. “He cleans, I cook.”

“Always nice to work as a team with your roommate instead of two separate units.” It was a neutral comment before Mom was smirking, reaching over to pinch Rose affectionately on the shoulder. “Is he cute?”

So Rose should be mad at the childish mocking but. She did smile a little back, shying away from the touch and shrugging her shoulders. “I really like him. I don’t think it matters if he’s cute or not. Though Jade said he was.”

“So where is the mystery hunk,” Mom cooed, leaning in her seat to peer down in the direction of the hallway. Rose stiffened as she put up her guard. Not out of jealousy of course, but there still was the possibility of Roxanne “Certified Cougar” Lalonde trying to pull a fast one. Mom didn’t have shame when it came to who Rose wanted to date. She pretended it disgusted her.

She actually admired it a lot. But _not_ in the case of Dave. If she was going to lose Dave to someone, she refused to let it be her mother.

“He’s at work,” Rose answered, getting up from her seat. “He should be home soon.” Making her way to the counter, she took a deep breath and exhaled, getting herself back down to calm. There was no use acting up. She was growing out of it. Starting to. Slowly. _Fuck..._

“Guess I’ll hang around a little longer then,” was Mom’s answer. Obviously. Of course. Why wouldn’t she want to stay? Nosing around in Rose’s life was her favorite pastime. No fighting it. Just let her have her way.

“Guess so,” Rose said flatly, barely a whisper. Pulling open the cupboards she started her rummaging, a bit rough with the packages she swatted aside. “Do you want any tea, Mom?”

“Of _course_ ,” was the high-pitched reply. By the tone of voice one would think Rose had never offered her mother tea before. She was ecstatic. Rose heard the creak of the chair as Mom sat back in it and shifted. She must have literally thrown herself back in her seat. God, everything had to be an event with her, didn’t it. “Thank you, Rose.”

Tea wasn’t painful, thankfully. Rose caught her mother up with her writing news, told her about work and school, the usual. Mom had apparently started a garden out on their country land, but nothing was living long. That didn’t surprise Rose much. Can’t really thoroughly water a line of plants when you can’t even walk a line on its own.

Still, Rose was enjoying herself when Dave finally came home. She greeted him (probably a little too eagerly, admittedly) but his back was to her, and judging by the bob in his head, his headphones were in.

“Sh—Sorry,” he stammered, scrambling to pull his headphones out once he was turned around and realized they had a guest. “Hey.”

“Welcome back,” Rose said, making sure the teasing was evident in her tone (in case the eyes didn’t give enough of an impression). Dave predictably flushed, but still stayed relatively cool as he threw his backpack next to the kitchen counter. “Mom, this is my new roommate.”

Rose was holding out a hand to present him, but when she turned to look at her mother, she was gone. A quick glance around found Mom already up on her feet, a hand gripping Rose’s chair tight enough to make her knuckles go white. Was Mom... Nervous? Oh come on, he wasn’t that good looking.

“Dave, right?” She asked, her tone uncharacteristically soft. Rose turned her head a bit toward the table. Did she even tell Mom his name?

“Yes ma’am,” he replied politely, slightly rubbing at his nose. Rose was watching in mostly curiosity at the slow way Mom was approaching him, as if he'd startle like a deer if she didn't. But the look turned to horror when Mom promptly moved both of her hands to either side of his face.

“Look at you. You’re so tall.”

“Yeah,” Dave answered, standing still despite the grabby hands. What the hell had gotten into her? Rose was mortified. “Been like this for a couple years now."

If it wouldn’t look overly invested, Rose would probably be moving to inspect Mom’s face right about now. This was just bizarre. She’d never acted this way around anyone before. Anyone.

“Mom,” she said instead, her tone begging. Please stop acting like a weirdo. Please. It took a moment but Mom did let go, backing off with a clearing of her throat and a forced chuckle.

“Sorry, sorry,” she offered, though she didn’t offer an explanation. She was now extending a hand like a normal human, which Dave took with a forgiving smile. “I’m Rose’s mother. You can just call me Mom.”

“ _Mom._ "

“It’s cool,” Dave answered. “I can dig Mom.”

Well that was a relief at least. Mom apparently thought so too, from the way she exhaled. It wasn’t however enough to snap her out of whatever trance Dave had put her in. She was still perfectly stationary, and she was still shaking his poor hand. Rose and Dave exchanged glances, and she flashed him the most apologetic frown she could muster. But Dave was smiling. He had such a sweet smile. Too bad he usually only switched between stoic and cartoon screaming.

“God,” Mom said suddenly, her arm jerking back and shooting to her hair. She pulled it back before patting her thighs, turning right around and scrambling around the kitchen table. “I should go!”

“What?"

Not that Rose particularly wanted her there, but this was just... Bizarre. This entire act.

“Nice to see you, Rose,” was her only response, already heading for the door. She didn’t turn around when she left, either. She should be rejoicing. Apparently Dave was the secret to keeping Mom out of her life for good. She should be glad and laughing but instead...

It just hurt. Nothing was different. Things weren't better. It always hurt.

“I am so sorry,” she breathed, forcing a laugh as she reached to wipe her eyes. “I have never seen her act like that. That was just--”

“She was crying,” he interrupted, moving over to pull a chair from the table and taking a seat. Rose almost missed what he said, distracted with the way his sleeves pulled tight around his biceps- what happened to how scrawny he was at the start of the summer?- and the little notch of fabric where his shoulders just weren’t quite full enough.

“She what?”

Snatching up a sugar cube from the bowl Dave popped it in his mouth, picking up another before he was even finished crunching the first between his teeth.

“She was crying. Or about to, at least.” He smacked his lips a few times, sucking on the sugar. “What were you guys talking about before I got here?”

“Gardening,” Rose answered. This was effectively... Way weirder than she expected this day to go when she woke up this morning.

“Hm.” Dave paused, swallowing down another sugar cube before he sat back. “What about you? Are you okay? I know you got some tension with your mom going on.”

Rose exhaled. Was she holding her breath? Just waiting for him to bring it up so she could break down? That’s sure how it felt. She could definitely feel the pressure of tears on her eyes. But she managed a smile, avoiding his gaze.

“Yeah, I’m fine. It’s just inconvenient mostly. Annoying to have her interruptions. As soon as she got here she was trying to get drunk. Unbelievable.”

Her voice fell into a whisper, avoiding a crack in her throat. Dave was silent, and the sound of her gulping down her nerves was way too loud in her ears.

“C’mon,” Dave finally said, getting up from his seat. He shucked off his jacket, unceremoniously draping it over the back of the chair. “I need a nap. Been up since five and I was up late last night talking to girls who are way out of my league.”

Rose could only answer that by breathing out a laugh, quick to wipe away the single tear that escaped. Now that he was mentioning sleep, yeah, she could go for that. She did still have the throbbing hangover going on. Not the worst one she’d ever had obviously, but enough to warrant a nap by far. She nodded when she stood up, easily falling under the arm Dave outstretched for her.

It was kind of strange, crawling back into Dave’s bed not two hours after she had stumbled out of it. But here she was. He threw himself on, she rolled next to him, pressing herself close and resting her head on his chest at the perfect angle to hear the thrum of his heartbeat. Cheesy. But perfect.

Except timing her breathing with his made her heart feel heavy. Listening to the silence made her eyes sting. She could feel her fingers curling, nails biting into the fabric of his shirt. One quake of her body and his hand on her shoulder pulled her closer to him. And she broke down.

God, she was a fucking disaster. She couldn’t even have a normal visit with her mother. Why would she want to drag someone into this mess with her? That would just be selfish. Her ears were ringing in the silence, but then she heard Dave telling her it was okay and she realized she was apologizing.

_“I’m so sorry.”_


	25. Chapter 25

In the grand scheme of things, Dave probably should have been thankful that Rose’s mom had made an impromptu visit. Not that meeting her meant much to him, but it seemed to have Rose completely distracted. So much so she didn’t even notice how  _fucking exhausted_  he was when he got home. He was dead inside, half asleep, with scene changes and dialogue tags floating across his vision.

Sleeping last night was enough of an event, with how much his brain was turning and mulling over all the circumstances of Rose’s escapades. And that was before work shot him down with an AK and an hour of script revisions kicked him in the groin. By the time he was home he felt like an empty shell. Without a doubt one that Rose would have worried about, if not for more pressing matters.

After the nap though, he felt back to himself. His hand was curled over Rose’s shoulder to keep her against him, her hair crisp from being wet without being brushed. He woke up with an instinctive pull of a breath in his nose but otherwise stayed silent, figuring it best to let her recharge after the unexpected visit.

Dave wasn’t exactly certain why Rose’s mother seemed so sentimental towards him. She looked at him like she knew him, but Dave certainly didn’t recognize her. The only thought he could even humor was the off chance she was some long lost friend of his brother’s, which after some consideration, sounded like something Dave would rather  _not_  know about. That just had way too much potential to go downhill. That had “Surprise, Bro fucked your life up again” written all over it.

Keeping one arm on Rose Dave used the other to pull out his phone, thumbing across the screen to screw around with Bubble Shooter. His toes were rhythmically rocking back and forth while he beatboxed in his head, doing his best to stay still enough not to wake Rose.

Eventually though she did wake up, inhaling much like he did and tightening her grip on him. She pressed closer as she stretched out her legs, a pleased moan cracking and whimpering in her throat.

“Afternoon,” Dave greeted, dropping his phone aside as soon as he saw her eyes. They were glossy and her eyelids were droopy and she had a red mark across her cheek from resting against a fold over in his shirt, but at the very least, she looked better. Better than emotional compromise and anxiety.

“I barely remember falling asleep,” she mused, pulling her hand off of his chest long enough to brush the length of her finger up along the underside of her eyelashes. “I’m so sorry about my mother.”

The minor panic that swelled in Dave’s chest subsided when he saw the way she was smiling, and he gave a small shrug in response.

“You got literally nothing to apologize for. You’ve also apologized like 600 times, so even you did, you’re covered.”

Rose rolled away onto her back with a yawn, staying cozied up next to him under his arm. One of her feet tipped toward his, and her head tilted as she observed them.

“I know my issues with her are something I’m going to have to deal with eventually, but somehow I feel better about it since this morning.”

Dave stayed quiet while he listened, engaging in the minor footsies she had started.

“Things are fine when I stop trying to expect her to be a mother, if that makes sense. Getting along with her is seemingly as easy as treating her as a friend, or maybe a sister. I know that isn’t okay perse, but it is something. And I think that’s about as much as I need to survive until such a time as we can work everything out together.”

“I’m so willing to admit she probably had me young and wasn’t- perhaps still isn’t- prepared to handle it. But I haven’t been willing to recognize the likelihood of that being something unintentional. And most certainly not done with malice.”

Sounded like Rose had everything figured out. He wanted to say something- maybe about him being proud of her, but it seemed out of place. His feelings about this were irrelevant, weren’t they? Unless she needed the validation? Shit, which was the right choice here?

“Don’t think I forgot about last night, by the way.”

“Wait, what?” What about last night? What happened that wasn’t to be forgotten?

The grin that crossed her face was absolutely mischievous, and only got more intimidating when she swung over a leg and rolled herself on top of him. Her arms crossed over his chest as she pillowed her head in them, feet popping up behind her.

“You agreed to let me peg you, remember?”

“Oh, right.”

He did agree to that. He sort of assumed she would have long forgotten about it, though. Especially considering how drunk she was. Guess she wasn’t black out drunk like he had assumed.

“I am kind enough to give you some leeway however, if you were only trying to shut my intoxicated self up. I’d accept going out for milkshakes as a trade off if you’re unwilling to follow through.”

“I’m not unwilling.”

That caught Rose off guard. Her teasing smirk faded the slightest bit, and her gaze moved from pointedly avoidant to straight on him. Luckily he hadn’t put his sunglasses back on yet. Though he would soon, if that harsh light kept spilling into his window.

“I thought it over a lot actually,” he continued, idly brushing his fingertips along her shoulder and watching the goosebumps appear. “Like the only reason it doesn’t happen is ‘cause it’s supposed to be unmasculine or whatever, right? Like, guy doing the girl is the whole normal thing just ‘cause heterosexuals run the world. But I figured, like…”

How did he explain this in a way that wasn’t going to end up being offensive?

“If you’re bi,” he started, swallowing back any hesitation that was threatening his tone, “Then you feel equal about guys and girls. So it’s like why would any masculinity standards be applicable? We’re on a level playing field, right? So it’s only fair we’d take fair turns, or whatever. I don’t know.”

Did that sound as stupid out loud as it did in his head? Maybe it did. He couldn’t quite tell from the blank stare Rose was shooting him. Was she angry? Flattered? Shocked and amazed at his amazing insight into her not-straight psyche?

Maybe while they were on the topic, he should maybe figure out exactly… What direction their relationship was going? If there was any way more than sex could be between them? Maybe? Possibly?

“You’re a remarkable person, you know that?”

Dave looked up a bit in surprise, transitioning easily into a smile when he started to recognize the sincerity on Rose’s face.

“Alright, I’ll take it.”

A shift of weight later and he was laughing against her lips, sinking himself under her and letting her take her lead.

Her hands were feather light as they moved up along his chest and over his shoulders. Fingertips traced back down his arms and to his sides, pushing up his shirt so he could take it off. Nerves bubbled up in the form of a laugh when his collar hooked on his ear, and Rose responded in kind before gently taking his wrists and moving them above his head.

“I’ll be right back,” she whispered, pecking him once more before climbing out of bed and disappearing into the hallway.

Dave was left to slink under his sheets, feeling almost self conscious. Everything sure did feel awkward, from the thought of watching Rose walk in with some no doubt brightly colored absurdly huge dick on her, to the paranoia about the state of his hygiene. It’s not like he had time to prepare for this. He slipped off his pants and boxers to kick aside and off the mattress, taking in a deep breath.

When she walked in though, he found it easy to relax. There were no weird colors or unimaginable lengths or girths. Just Rose, short and timid in an oversized white t-shirt that needed to be ironed. She was admiring the small bottle in her hand, uncapping it and squeezing a dollop onto her fingers. He could see the obvious jut in the fabric from where it was hanging over her- What did they call it? _Harness?_  Oh, God.

She climbed up on her knees, lifting up the sheet he had hid under. He managed to shoot her a lopsided smile as he sat up on his forearms, head dipping back as her hand disappeared between his legs.

He wasn’t about to call it an unpleasant experience. Rose was careful and caring, as much as he had expected. She was even nice enough to take care of him afterwards, bringing in a couple glasses of lemonade and setting up a movie to watch on his laptop to waste the rest of the afternoon away.

The summer heat was still beating into the room even with the curtain pulled, and both of them had resigned to sitting together completely naked across his bed. Dave had pulled a sheet across his lap for modesty’s sake, but Rose was unconcerned, doing nothing more than keeping her knees pulled up to her chest.

She was painting her toenails when the movie was over, and Dave was just now starting to feel brave enough to sit up.

“What do you suppose happens next?” Rose asked suddenly, head tilting back and forth as she admired her handy work. Dave was caught off guard, heart beginning to thrum in his chest.

“What do you mean, exactly?”

“We’re all sort of in limbo, you know? I’m waiting on word from a publisher, you’re waiting on school, Jade’s… In the aftermath.”

He let his gaze fall a bit out of respect, curling his sheets around his fingers.

“It’s like none of us have anything to be working on anymore. It feels weird.”

“Don’t get too melancholy on me,” he teased, reaching an arm up to wipe sweat from the back of his neck. “We got plenty to deal with. You’ll have an editor soon and you’ll be back to editing and preparing for publishing. I’m back into revisions, and you know… John’s probably got to finish his fucking. Bible.”

Rose let out a distinct snort before she slumped against him to laugh, promptly reaching over and running her wet polish brush across his chest with a streak of black.

“Don’t be rude, I love his stories. I’m sure everyone doubts prophets at first.”

Prophet. Right. He wasn’t going to say anything rude to anyone’s face or anything, but that was just absurd. Surely Rose knew that, she was just being nice.

“You’re right though. I shouldn’t get too comfortable.”

When she turned to him it was quickly interrupted by a bit of a snicker, and a hand reached over to start thumbing at his neck.

“You’re going to need some cover-up for work.”

He slumped back a bit to move his own hand over the bruise he knew was there, pointedly avoiding her gaze with a small huff. “Pretty proud of yourself, aren’t you?”

“Oh, absolutely.”

Dave went to work the next day in the same fashion he always did. Aside from the make up he was currently wearing on his neck, which Rose was nice enough to donate. He had to ask where she got some that was dark enough for his skin, and all she did was noncommittally shrug her shoulders. Left over from an ex was his first assumption, but he wasn’t going to push the issue. No use upsetting her when she was probably still so volatile.

Things were pretty normal, too, and his shift went without incident.

Until about 15 minutes before he got off, and the jingle of the door chime went. In came Rose with John in tow, both of them red in the face and a little out of breath. They seemed to be spiritedly talking as they waited in Dave’s line up, Rose’s hand finding itself on John’s shoulder about every second  _fucking_  word.

He swallowed down the bitterness that was rising up his throat as they approached, slouching a bit now that he was in familiar company instead of his usual customers.

“Earl Grey I’m guessing,” he greeted, giving a snap toward Rose. “I don’t know what you drink, though.” His gaze turned to John while he waited, ringing in Rose’s drink by muscle memory.

“Nothing for me,” John answered, stepping back a little. His voice cracked a bit when he spoke, and he held up a fist as he cleared his throat. Sounded like he was going through puberty.

Rose leaned forward as she interrupted, both hands on the counter. His eyes darted down as she managed to squeeze her chest between her arms, but he quickly refocused on her eyes.

“You’re never going to guess what happened,” she exclaimed, lipstick cracking as her smile stretched wider than her dark goth soul could have ever anticipated.

“It’s amazing,” John interjected, excitedly outstretching his arms.

Dave moved over to the left as he started to make Rose’s drink, leaning past the machines so he could still see them. “Well don’t leave me hanging, what’s gone down?”

Oddly enough Rose stayed silent as Dave finished the frap, bouncing a little on her toes. Eventually though he rounded the counter to bring her the drink, and she threw herself at him so quickly he almost slipped on the wet floor. After a tight hug she stepped back, keeping her hands on his shoulders.

“They said  _yes_!”

For the first moment, Dave had no idea what she was talking about. John threw up a fist from behind her, but it wasn’t clicking. Then she continued.

“I’m getting published!”

A weight dropped through Dave’s entire body as John spiritedly starting clapping. Dave’s bottom lip hung open, and he kept looking between them. Was this real?

“No fucking way,” he finally sputtered, pulling her back in for another hug, if only to keep his face out of her view.

As his stomach swirled, he desperately tried to decide if he was jealous of her success, or just jealous that she told John before she told him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lets just all pretend it didnt take me a year to finish this. (y) we're moving into the climax now, so hopefully the next time i disappear for months it'll be because the fics actually over


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BEFORE YOU READ THIS CHAPTER: I want to let you all know that the first 25 chapters of this fic have been edited, some just for grammar, and some plot points have been changed to follow my original vision, and restore some continuity. Nothing MAJOR has changed, but if you HAVE been planning a reread, or are interested in a refresher, now's the perfect time!
> 
> Thanks everyone!

The “you’re getting published” high wore off unexpectedly fast. When Rose had first received the revisions from her editor, she had been excited to start. Sleeves rolled up, hair pulled into a messy bun. She even came to the coffee shop daily to work, her knees pulled up under her and a pen slipped between her teeth for taking notes.

But that only lasted a week.

She had been warned about sending in a first draft. Maybe she had been cocky, or maybe some part of her wanted to fail. She had done it despite her better judgement. And here she was, every single page with an error. By the time the first week was coming to a close, she had barely made it into the third act. Her cute bun aesthetic had turned into three days of built up grease, the bags under her eyes were atrocious, and she couldn’t remember the last time she had slept for a solid seven hours.

She stopped bothering going to Dave’s work. She quit her job and stopped going to class. She set up camp on the couch with a blanket and an assorted collection of empty Earl Grey teas that Dave had been bringing back for her whenever his shift ended.

With her absorption into edits, Dave had taken over all of the household responsibilities, plus the added bonus of babysitting her. And from what she could tell according to her few observations, he was- very rapidly- losing his patience.

He didn’t talk when he cooked anymore. Just dropped a plate in front of her without so much as telling her it was there. His movements were loud and harsh and grumpy. She could feel the strain it was causing on their relationship. They hadn’t hung out, made out, made love, in days. She barely had time to answer John’s texts.

She had been keeping track of the days. But at this point, she didn’t know how many it had been. Only that she had 64 pages left.

When Dave came in, she managed to miss the sound of the door coming open and shutting, and only noticed thanks to the blowout of his headphones being on full blast. For the first time in what must have been hours she pulled her eyes from the screen of her laptop, meagerly smiling as he set down yet another Earl Grey. He was quick to turn around to head toward his room, but she had already noticed his headphones hanging from his hand.

“How was work?” She asked, her voice hoarse from underuse. She tilted her laptop screen downward to reach for her drink, the smoothness of it refreshing on her throat. She hadn’t even noticed how dehydrated she had gotten.

“Holy fuck,” he replied, turning around to gaze around the apartment, apparently playing stupefied that he still had a roommate. “Is someone there? I don’t have anything worth stealing. Just this squatter with a laptop.”

She rolled her eyes, but her smile betrayed her. She missed his humor. Which was so stupid; it wasn’t like they had been apart.

“I’m sorry I’ve been so absorbed in this,” she said, giving her laptop a pat without looking at it. If she looked, she might get sucked back in. “I’m going to take a break tonight. We should do something.”

He seemed unenthused, twirling his headphones around absentmindedly and keeping his gaze pointedly away from her. The way his tongue was pressing to his cheek and the closed off body language he was putting forward… He really was upset.

“I could make it up to you,” she bargained, though she was damn sure she didn’t look remotely sexy after being glued to this couch for almost four days straight. “You’ve got to have something shameful in your repertoire that I could make a reality for you.”

“No thanks,” he said finally, turning on his heel and disappearing into the hall. “Wouldn’t want to keep you from your work.”

She felt guilty. Turning back to her document, her fingers twitched and ached to keep working, to just do one, two, three more changes and then finally finish for the night. Just get to the end of the page. The end of the chapter. Just push to page 100. End off somewhere clean.

But she managed to stop herself, shutting her laptop firmly. It was time for a break. And she was prepared to take drastic measures. She slipped the computer under her arm, marching down the hallway and giving Dave’s door a firm knock. His darkroom sign wasn’t up, but there was a weirdly panicked “hold on” that sounded like it should be.

But the light was on when he opened the door, window uncovered. Maybe something would be suspect in his eyes, but all she could see was her own reflection staring back at her.

“Here,” she said, handing her laptop over to him. “I want you to know I’m serious about this. And I also trust you more than myself to keep me in line.”

Despite the frown, despite the knitted eyebrows and stern expression and cold attitude, his lips turned up into a smirk and he took the laptop from her.

“I know just the place,” he announced, opening the door wider in invitation and moving toward his bookshelf- not really stacked with books so much as weird junk and photography paraphernalia, including what looked to be an album.

Her hands slid to cover her eyes, so she didn’t have to watch him slide her precious computer to the very top shelf and far beyond out of her reach.

“That’s just cruel,” she whined, laughing into her palms. “I don’t appreciate this mockery. This is prejudice.”

“Yeah, sure,” he said sarcastically, crossing his arms over his chest. “Go have a shower, first of all. You’ll feel better.”

“Oh, so you aren’t just asking me to because I look awful? Regretting sleeping with the unmasked troll?”

From the expression he shot her, he wasn’t even going to humor her self-deprecating. He continued.

“Second of all, you need to take your coffee cup collection to the trash. I’d have done it myself, but I’m worried you’ll pounce like a whip scorpion if I get too close.” Alright, that made her laugh. “And lastly, you’re cooking. Do you have any idea how much I miss your food? I can’t believe you could even stand the crap I’ve been serving you.”

“Don’t say that,” she argued, fighting off the urge to hug him, at least until she was clean. “I am so thankful to have had you here taking care of me the past few days and being so understanding about this.”

He was smiling, but something still felt off. Maybe it was how unclean she still was throwing her perception off balance. She could reassess after her shower.

“I’m just happy for you,” he said. Rose watched herself in his sunglasses. “I want to help out. Even if that includes forcing you to laze around for a night. I need to finish something in here for now, so I won’t distract you from your chores.”

His last word had a distinct tone to it, dripping with sarcasm.

“Alright, alright.”

She didn’t realize how much she needed the wash until she was stepping out of the shower. Maybe it was all the time without one, but suddenly she felt hypersensitive to the very feeling of hygiene.

The flush in her cheeks from the water’s heat burned, she could feel every drop of water that dripped from her hair rolling over every pore, and the softness of the towel wrapped around her felt like a dress made of clouds. Her only thought was that she had become numb to the sense of touch as her sweat turned into a crystallized layer of salt on her skin as the days passed, and only now was she readjusting.

Her eyes were half lidded as she wandered back to her room, enjoying the squish of carpet between her toes. Her thoughts had been so preoccupied with grammar and continuity and witches and knights that she could see the outline of her editor’s comment boxes flash over her vision even as she desperately tried to shake them out.

She slipped into a pair of pajamas to clean up her work area, fresh from the drawer and still smelling like fabric softener. They really had never felt softer on her skin. She probably still looked dazed as she rounded up her empty cups into a trash bag, leaving it by the door. It was only half full (somehow) so she figured it best to leave it until the book was completely edited. Maybe she could turn it into an art piece.

Now Dave wanted dinner. She really wanted to make something nice for him, but she couldn’t remember the last time she got groceries.

Thankfully, growing up under the roof of a seasoned alcoholic had made her resourceful. With a couple of chicken breasts she dug out from the bottom of the freezer and the almost-stale bread ends in the cupboard she managed to throw something edible onto a plate, which she promptly delivered to Dave’s door with a careful rap of her knuckles.

He’d managed to lose his pants in the time it took her to get her life back together, and around his neck were the clunky headphones from his turntables. She stood on her toes to try and peer past him, curious as to what secretive thing he could be up to. He defensively pulled the door against himself to keep her from peeking.

“You look better,” he noted, his head nodding slowly as he surveyed her head to toe.

“I needed the time off. I appreciate your iron fist.” She held up the plate for him in one hand, another safely balanced behind her back. “Can I come in?”

“Uh.”

He shut the door quickly and rummaged through something behind it. That certainly wasn’t suspect at all. Once the room was silent again, he gently turned the knob to unlatch the door.

“Sure.”

She used her shoulder to push the door open, bringing their meals with her and somehow managing to navigate the junk in his room to put the plates down on what little space was left on his desk. He seemed to be getting a lot of use out of his photo equipment. There were drops of solution everywhere and clothes pins dotted the string he had tied up across the room. But, surprisingly, there wasn’t a photo in sight.

His headphones seemed to just be connected to his iPhone, both of which he set aside to smooth out a spot on his bed for her to sit. She drank in his room as she moved next to him. The chaos, the scent. It was homey despite being completely unrelated to her; like another dimension. It wasn’t until her eyes caught a glimpse of Jade’s old photograph stuffed in the corner of his bulletin board that her bliss fell apart.

She didn’t even break into her chicken before she turned to him.

“Remember earlier on in the summer, you and I were discussing how you had rubbed off on me, and one of us suggested that I would rub off on you, too?”

His mouth was full but he grunted. Rose tried not to laugh at just how much chicken was hanging out of his mouth.

“I think you’re upset about something. And I think you don’t want to tell me. This isn’t the first time you’ve done this either, and I think you may have picked it up from me.”

He didn’t deny anything, even after he swallowed his bite and started prodding at what was left on his plate with the prongs of his fork.

“You taught me to bring things to you instead of letting my bad assumptions fester. And I have felt so much better since. Will you please tell me what’s bothering you?”

He sighed through his nose while Rose slipped a bite of chicken into her mouth.

“I don’t know,” he finally muttered after letting a few moments of silence pass.

“Is it about shirking on my chores? Because I really am sorry, and I promise I’ll start taking breaks to cook.”

“It’s not that.”

“Do you want me to pay you back for the drinks? I can.”

“No.”

She turned away, mulling over some other possibilities.

“I just miss you, I guess,” he said, his head turned away. “Even before you started with editing…

She stayed quiet to let him finish, but he didn’t say anything more. His brain was working- she could tell that much without seeing the look in his eyes. He had more to say. More conclusions he was coming to. But, she couldn’t very well force him to talk about it. So, she didn’t.

“Let’s play together tonight.”

Dave lit up.

It was like he had done a complete 180. He was back to his talkative self, finishing his meal, telling her about his current photo project, (including how private it was), complaining about work. He apparently even ran into Victoria at the shop, though he had no idea the girl with the weirdly (amazing) long fingers from their building was the same girl Rose had slept with; the same girl that had texted him about it.

For the first time in days they washed up together. Jammed to the radio, knocked hips, laughed about awful impressions.

And when the apartment started to get dark, enough for Dave’s shades to finally come off and be discarded, they got comfortable around his tables. Jade’s plants were growing abnormally well behind them, aside from the one they had to throw out. One was even reaching out, trying to wrap itself around its neighbor. Dave tried to discourage the behavior by wrapping it around a pencil instead, and so far, it was working.

“You start this time,” Rose said, idly fingering at the strings of her violin. She was still a little stage shy. But knowing that he was too was all the confidence she needed.

“Alright,” he agreed, mulling over his soundboard as he started to press buttons. An 8-bit tune started, and after a few bars Rose joined in with a riff of her own. Dave mixed around her the way he so flawlessly did, turning their simple jam into real music. He added drums and harmonies.

It felt weird playing in her pajamas. But she liked it, because as long as she was playing with him, nothing else really mattered.

She paused so he could throw together a hook on his own, joining in again when she started to get restless. She played a few bars past him before coming to an abrupt stop, and Dave unplugged both of their headphones.

[He let the song play](https://homestuck.bandcamp.com/track/core-of-darkness) and the music filled the room. She went from a gentle tapping of her foot to dragging him out from behind the table, dancing around him, feeling his hands slide along her arms and off hers, catching glimpses of his smile every time she spun around.

It wasn’t until the song ended that she started laughing, letting her body slump against his. Had she been this tired the entire time?

“I’ve missed you,” she mumbled, her eyes fluttering closed as his arms moved around her. She could feel his face pressed against the top of her head, one of his hands cradling the back of it.

“I’ve always been here,” he assured her, fingers weaving through her hair. “I’m not leaving.”

Except he was. In a little over a month.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to extend my deepest thanks and gratitude to my friend http://archiveofourown.org/users/dirkharley for pulling an all nighter in order to beta all 87000 words of this fic for me. They are amazing and one of the best friends I have had in a long ass time, please show your appreciation for them and their work by giving their fics a read! x o x o x o


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